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Is she interested or not?


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Went on a date with this girl on Tuesday. It lasted about 3.5 hours and we both were very engaging in the conversation, good eye contact ,laughing..I noticed she turned herself towards me from her bar chair. And then I walked her to her car and asked for her number. She took my number and then I got in her car cause she wanted to drive over to my car since it was raining. We talked for a few more minutes then I gave her a hug and then we started kissing. She told me she would text me when she got home, which she did. She said she made it home and thanks again for tonight with a smiling emoji. I told her I had a great time and lets do it again soon. She said "I'd like that" and then asked her what day she was free next week. She said Monday and then I told her awesome and said I'll let you pick where you want to go this time since I picked out the first time and to just let me know. Haven't heard from her since then. Did I *** up by saying she can pick? I just didn't want it to seem like I kept picking places and not give her a choice, ya know? Any advice helps. Thanks.

 

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22 minutes ago, SirIssacNutin said:

Went on a date with this girl on Tuesday. It lasted about 3.5 hours and we both were very engaging in the conversation, good eye contact ,laughing..I noticed she turned herself towards me from her bar chair. And then I walked her to her car and asked for her number. She took my number and then I got in her car cause she wanted to drive over to my car since it was raining. We talked for a few more minutes then I gave her a hug and then we started kissing. She told me she would text me when she got home, which she did. She said she made it home and thanks again for tonight with a smiling emoji. I told her I had a great time and lets do it again soon. She said "I'd like that" and then asked her what day she was free next week. She said Monday and then I told her awesome and said I'll let you pick where you want to go this time since I picked out the first time and to just let me know. Haven't heard from her since then. Did I *** up by saying she can pick? I just didn't want it to seem like I kept picking places and not give her a choice, ya know? Any advice helps. Thanks.

 

No, I don't think you messed anything up, but she may just be "unsure" about you. It was only one date so maybe she wasn't really feeling it? Although it has also been  only a couple of days. You could text her again and ask her out and see what she says? Some people don't feel the need to text all the time in the early stages of dating.

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3 hours ago, SirIssacNutin said:

Did I *** up by saying she can pick?

No, why would you assume that?

There might be several other reasons she hasn't yet replied. I highly doubt she is offended that you suggest she pick the place. Relax. 

See if she reponds in the next day or so. 

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You didnt do anything wrong. However, some are "one and done" sometimes. You maybe liked her but she didnt like you from some reason, it happens.

The reason I am saying this is because she didnt confirmed or messaged further. So it doesnt seem like she is interested in furthering it. 

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From the date she seems interested enough.

Maybe you came on a bit too strong trying to agree a second date the same night as the first date and it put her on the spot a bit as well as making you seem a bit over eager.

Also as the expression goes a lot of women like "a man with a plan" and you seem a bit wishy washy by wanting to see her again but not having any idea what you want to do. And again by leaving up to her to "let you know" you are again making her have to take the lead. So you are coming across as quite passive and if she likes you but isn't sure about her she isn't going to be inclined to chase or take the lead to make the next date happen. 

On the plus side she did say she is free on Monday. She could have easily said something like "I'm not sure yet" or "Let me check my schedule and get back to you". So I think you can give her the benefit of the doubt and text her suggesting dinner on Monday and pick the place.

Something along the lines of "So for our date on Monday night I was wondering if you fancied Italian food. I know a great place in (neighborhood/location)".  By assuming the date is still on you show confidence and by picking a place you take the pressure of her if she doesn't want to make a decision while still showing you want to take her somewhere she will like (which I assume was the original intention when you wanted her to pick). 

 

 

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It's possible...some women like a man to take the lead at least in the beginning. She might have interpreted as her having to pay for the next date or just you laying back. You see some women measure their value to a man by his efforts. Next time pick a place but also say "Unless you have something else in mind..." 

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13 hours ago, SirIssacNutin said:

Haven't heard from her since then. Did I *** up by saying she can pick? I just didn't want it to seem like I kept picking places and not give her a choice, ya know? Any advice helps. Thanks.

 

Have you heard from her now? If not, text or call her and ask her if she’d like to go out and if she has any places in mind she’d like to go to. 

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Call her today and, or leave a message (NO TEXTING) with an idea of where to go; museum, cafe, bowling, hit some baseballs, sporty stuff, go for a hike, picnic at sunset...too early for you to just put your feet up like your old friends.  Don't be that guy.  Woo her for at least six dates.

It may be old fashioned, but I would be super turned off by that uninventive passiveness.

Edited by tattoobunnie
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14 hours ago, SirIssacNutin said:

. . . then I told her awesome and said I'll let you pick where you want to go this time since I picked out the first time and to just let me know. 

Is that how you worded it?

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5 hours ago, tattoobunnie said:

Don't be that guy.  Woo her for at least six dates.

Today is Friday(well, somewhere even Saturday). If she hasnt even checked in 3 days I dont believe him wooing her would do anything. Also, he didnt do anything wrong. Its OK for her to choose date venue, its not like he asked her hand in marriage.

I do agree that he should check. "Are we still on for Monday?" wouldnt hurt and he would at least know where it stands instead of questioning the crystal ball.

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