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Married man attraction


Catsclaws00
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2 minutes ago, Catsclaws00 said:

Thanks for all the comments . He emailed on Friday asking if we could discuss a recent thing I’m dealing with at work he said can we meet tomorrow to discuss.. clearly I want to see him and last time I wore something really low cut to see where he looked

I’m feeling like you’re just trying to egg people on. Most human beings don’t behave like you at work and mess around with revealing clothing for a work meeting. Clearly you want to see how much you can play with fire without getting burned. Of course he might look.  I’m a woman and I notice if someone is dressed inappropriately.  When I had my baby bump at the office of course I noticed people noticing my adorable pregnant belly. It’s obvious just like you dressing like an escort in a professional office will stick out and be noticed for the shock value. 
did you see our new Supreme Court Justice in the United States give her speech?  About how her confirmation gives hope to young girls all over that they too can become a Justice ?  By contrast you flaunting your breasts to a married man at an office wil show your younger female colleagues the opposite - women have to flaunt their bodies to succeed.  Do you really want to make that impression as a human being and woman???

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You obviously have no care at all for how showing him your cleavage is inappropriate and how having sexual contact with him would affect his wife and family.

If you're fine with being the butt of office gossip jokes and interfering in someone's marriage, then go ahead and continue down this destructive path.

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1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

I’m feeling like you’re just trying to egg people on. 

 Agree - compounded by the fact that this exact same scenario has been posted elsewhere.  Pretty much word for word, and all the identical advice has been given.  

OP - you are on track to wreck your career, and already seem to have thrown your self respect out the window.  

I don't think it will prove to be worthwhile.   Even if you manage to get him to have some kind of sexual contact with you, it won't go anywhere.  

Your descriptions of prolonged eye contact, touching body parts and remaining completely still, etc.  come off as very cringeworthy.   If I were that man I would never be in the same room with you no matter how hot you might be.  

 

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You guys were right- I met him today and he said how he told another one of our colleagues that he was mentoring me. He clearly sees himself as a mentor /professionally and nothing else. I have a crush and totally missed judged his motives 

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20 minutes ago, Catsclaws00 said:

You guys were right- I met him today and he said how he told another one of our colleagues that he was mentoring me. He clearly sees himself as a mentor /professionally and nothing else. I have a crush and totally missed judged his motives 

But that's a good thing! You won't end up being the mistress of a married man and you won't be risking your career.

Please stop doing things like showing him your cleavage and trying to get him alone in rooms. Keep everything strictly professional.

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I’m not trying to get him alone in rooms, I met him today and he pretty much whisked me straight in to a room and we sat for around 45 mins talking. We still had a few little moments where I felt something was quite flirty, but tried to ignore and he is helping me with work issues so that is a positive. He said I am learning loads and doing great job etc 

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2 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

Now just be professional. 

I will try… not trying to be a terrible person I just find him ready attractive. His wife has covid at the moment so I wished her well etc , I am trying my best to be a good person 

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6 minutes ago, Catsclaws00 said:

I will try… not trying to be a terrible person I just find him ready attractive. His wife has covid at the moment so I wished her well etc , I am trying my best to be a good person 

What's there to "try"? He's married and not interested in an affair. So what if you find him attractive? That's irrelevant. You don't need to dress provocatively or act flirtatiously.

Have you joined any groups or gone to any events? How about creating a profile on a dating site so you can meet single, available men?

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34 minutes ago, Catsclaws00 said:

I will try… not trying to be a terrible person I just find him ready attractive. His wife has covid at the moment so I wished her well etc , I am trying my best to be a good person 

Think if you were married and some other woman was chasing your husband around. How would that make you feel? 

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1 hour ago, Catsclaws00 said:

He clearly sees himself as a mentor /professionally and nothing else. 

Ok. Now. Get a good profile and pics on some quality dating apps and start talking to and meeting single, interested men.

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2 hours ago, Catsclaws00 said:

I will try… not trying to be a terrible person I just find him ready attractive. His wife has covid at the moment so I wished her well etc , I am trying my best to be a good person 

It's fine to find married men attractive.  It's not fine to react by flirting or pursuing in any romantic way.  Just like I was so tempted to buy this chocolate peanut butter bundt cake yesterday when we were away -and I convinced myself not to for health reasons.  Make good choices in reaction to feelings and do the right thing even when it is hard.

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9 hours ago, Catsclaws00 said:

I am trying my best to be a good person 

It's not hard to do this. 

Just don't engage inappropriately or find ways to draw inappropriate attention to yourself. You will wind up embarrassing yourself in front of him and all your colleagues. 

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