boltnrun Posted April 4, 2022 Author Share Posted April 4, 2022 The convenience store across the street closed down and therefore the homeless population dropped considerably in the immediate area. They seem to congregate around 7-11 stores and liquor stores. Another heat wave coming. A three day heat wave. Temps rising 25 degrees, then three days later dropping 25 degrees. It's totally nuts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 6, 2022 Author Share Posted April 6, 2022 Insomnia came back with a vengeance. I slept from 10 pm to 1 am. That's it. Apparently I'm so freaked out over the possibility of catching coronavirus at my hair appointment that I couldn't sleep. And the night before, apparently I was so freaked out over the possibility of catching coronavirus at my doctor appointment that I couldn't sleep. This is so effing stupid. I'm doing all the things I was too afraid to do before but apparently my anxiety hasn't gotten the message that I don't want to be afraid anymore. I think my psych appointment is next week. We're going to have to discuss how I can stop letting my anxiety ruin my life because I can't take this anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 6, 2022 Share Posted April 6, 2022 I think you said you went off your meds. Maybe reconsider going back on? My husband and I accept we are on them for life. He is completely non functional without them. There is no shame in helping yourself to enjoy life . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 6, 2022 Author Share Posted April 6, 2022 3 minutes ago, Seraphim said: I think you said you went off your meds. Maybe reconsider going back on? My husband and I accept we are on them for life. He is completely non functional without them. There is no shame in helping yourself to enjoy life . My doctor wrote me a new prescription for Ativan to use as needed. I just need to go pick it up. I'm not always like this, it seems to be whenever I have some kind of appointment. What's strange is the hair appointment was originally supposed to be last Friday. And I slept just fine the night before that one. I'm actually unsure if it's the anxiety or the fact that the temperature went up by about 25 degrees. I always struggle to sleep when I'm too hot. But definitely something to discuss during my psych appointment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reinventmyself Posted April 6, 2022 Share Posted April 6, 2022 Sorry, this has all come back to visit you. Anxiety is a beast. My therapist told me once, while I was bemoaning the fact that I couldn't conquer it. He told me to embrace it and not fight it. That I needed to accept that it was part of me and that *everybody has something. This just happens to be my something. Not sure it helps much but embracing might help you look at it a little differently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 6, 2022 Author Share Posted April 6, 2022 4 minutes ago, reinventmyself said: Sorry, this has all come back to visit you. Anxiety is a beast. My therapist told me once, while I was bemoaning the fact that I couldn't conquer it. He told me to embrace it and not fight it. That I needed to accept that it was part of me and that *everybody has something. This just happens to be my something. Not sure it helps much but embracing might help you look at it a little differently. That's probably true. I just hate feeling like such a ninny. And it makes no sense. Firstly, I already had Covid and thankfully didn't have a severe case. Additionally, I have been seriously ill before, more than once. My colon ruptured open a few years ago, and my kidneys began to fail while I was pregnant. Twice. I've been told I was going to die THREE times. And I sailed through all of that. So why is this pandemic hitting me so hard? Definitely need to continue with my psych doctor to get to the root cause. I feel like if I figure out why I can learn better ways to deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted April 7, 2022 Share Posted April 7, 2022 Bolt, It's not just you - the pandemic has hit millions hard in ways that I don't think we fully understand yet. It is fraying the last of our nerves and it continues on, with cases going up. Just when you think it's done, it's not. Practically everyone I know, myself included, has had to either go up on their current psychiatric medications and/or add another medication in order to manage their symptoms. You're not alone. I went up on one of my antidepressants in Spring 2020. It was just starting to hit the US and at that time, I wouldn't see my family again for many months so I asked my doctor for a boost. I doubt I'll go back to the dose I was on before. Too much has changed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 7, 2022 Author Share Posted April 7, 2022 I'm sorry, Fudgie. I hate how so many peoples mental health has been affected. And it seems like it's never going to end. Well, my haircut kind of went the way I feared on one hand. Hair stylist didn't clean her station between her previous client and me. No masks on anyone. She coughed while she was applying a mask to my hair. She kept licking her fingers and rubbing her nose while she was cutting my hair. She picked a cushion up off the floor for me to sit on. BUT...she gave me an absolutely fantastic haircut. It's exactly what I was hoping for and more. I look fabulous. So I guess a little potential Covid exposure is worth a terrific haircut lol. I tipped her $25 because I loved the cut so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 7, 2022 Author Share Posted April 7, 2022 Finally slept last night. I took an Ativan at 8 pm because I felt I couldn't make it through another day with almost no sleep. I think I slept for 7 hours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 7, 2022 Share Posted April 7, 2022 Lack of sleep can definitely make anxiety a lot worse. Glad you got some sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reinventmyself Posted April 8, 2022 Share Posted April 8, 2022 On 4/6/2022 at 6:47 PM, boltnrun said: She kept licking her fingers and rubbing her nose while she was cutting my hair. ex cosmetologist here - for a minute - in another life. Licking her fingers??? lol Don't mean to laugh but the visual is priceless. Sorry it added to your discomfort. Glad you got a good haircut out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 8, 2022 Author Share Posted April 8, 2022 24 minutes ago, reinventmyself said: ex cosmetologist here - for a minute - in another life. Licking her fingers??? lol Don't mean to laugh but the visual is priceless. Sorry it added to your discomfort. Glad you got a good haircut out of it. IKR?? I have never had anyone do that before. I can't imagine why she would even want to. Her fingers were full of the mask she'd put on my hair. I immediately walked home and shampooed. I always do that anyway because I can't stand the little bits of cut hair all over myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 9, 2022 Author Share Posted April 9, 2022 Hot Hot Heat! Thursday and Friday were miserable. Fortunately it's supposed to cool down quite a bit starting today. Big event taking place in my area this weekend. The biggest event of the year. I'm sitting in my window watching all the people walking to the event. I went for one day last year but I have a family road trip planned for next month so I decided to skip this event and save up for the family trip. Really looking forward to this trip! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 9, 2022 Share Posted April 9, 2022 I don’t know how people live with the heat. In the summer here I about die because it is humid heat. But lucky for central air in this house. The last one we had window air conditioning for 11 years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 9, 2022 Author Share Posted April 9, 2022 3 minutes ago, Seraphim said: I don’t know how people live with the heat. In the summer here I about die because it is humid heat. But lucky for central air in this house. The last one we had window air conditioning for 11 years. No AC in my apartment. These older "vintage" buildings tend not to have it. A window unit won't work because I'd have to do some disallowed alterations to the window. I do have a small personal cooling unit that I can set down on a table and point in my direction lol. I'll probably need that in the summertime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 9, 2022 Share Posted April 9, 2022 1 minute ago, boltnrun said: No AC in my apartment. These older "vintage" buildings tend not to have it. A window unit won't work because I'd have to do some disallowed alterations to the window. I do have a small personal cooling unit that I can set down on a table and point in my direction lol. I'll probably need that in the summertime. I would absolutely die for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 9, 2022 Author Share Posted April 9, 2022 1 minute ago, Seraphim said: I would absolutely die for sure. People find a way to adjust. It's actually very surprising and amazing. Where I used to live it was over 100 degrees Fahrenheit three months out of each year and often longer. I would look at the forecast and think "Oh, only 103 today! Not so bad!" Of course, out there we all had AC. It was actually written in the tenant's rights that AC had to be provided in all rental units. But now that I've moved back here I got wimpy lol. I just saw the cutest thing, there's a big automotive event taking place in my area and two ladies just walked by with their little dog. They had dressed him or her in a checkered flag shirt. How adorable! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 10, 2022 Author Share Posted April 10, 2022 I really don't like it when people use their faith as a weapon or to denigrate others. A man standing on a street corner with a loudspeaker was saying everyone who attended the event this weekend was worshipping the devil (yes, he said this). He also denigrated the women who he claimed were dressed immodestly (nothing about the men). I saw women wearing t-shirts and shorts. What are they supposed to wear when it's 72 degrees, sweatpants and hoodies? So me being who I am, I noticed that he had shaved and I told him there's a scripture that forbids men from cutting their beards (paraphrasing, it's in Leviticus). And he stopped for a few seconds and then just said "Oh, oh, oh..." He didn't have an answer for that one! If he's going to refer to the Old Testament and use it to call people names, well, two can play that game! I believe faith is for everyone who believes, and I don't believe I have the right to tell anyone how to worship their higher being or that they must worship a higher being. How about being good people? And if you choose to be a person of faith and practice your faith, that's fantastic! Do what you feel is right for you. But no need to be calling people devil worshippers or giving women a hard time for dressing appropriately for the weather. I wanted to do something to help someone because we need to practice what we preach, right? There was a homeless couple a couple blocks away who were holding signs asking for cash, clothing and food. So I went home and got a bag of women's clothing I had planned to give away and put four cereal bars in the bag and brought it to them. Hopefully it helps a little. Thankfully it cooled down a LOT from Thursday and Friday, both of which were in the high 90s. It's supposed to be in the high 60s for the next few days. Whew! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 10, 2022 Share Posted April 10, 2022 It remind me I went into Walmart one time and this woman says to me do you believe in Jesus ? I said , yes. She says to me then you should not be wearing pants or jewelry. That is immodest. I shrugged and said my religion doesn’t say so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 10, 2022 Author Share Posted April 10, 2022 Just now, Seraphim said: It remind me I went into Walmart one time and this woman says to me do you believe in Jesus ? I said , yes. She says to me then you should not be wearing pants or jewelry. That is immodest. I shrugged and said my religion doesn’t say so. WHY do some people who claim to be Christian always quote the Old Testament? How about actually quoting Jesus, who told us to love one another? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 10, 2022 Share Posted April 10, 2022 10 minutes ago, boltnrun said: WHY do some people who claim to be Christian always quote the Old Testament? How about actually quoting Jesus, who told us to love one another? I don’t understand because the Old Testament is not the entirety of the Bible . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 10, 2022 Author Share Posted April 10, 2022 Just now, Seraphim said: I don’t understand because the Old Testament is not the entirety of the Bible . Exactly! The New Testament tells the story of Jesus which is why it's called "Christianity". But let's quote the Old Testament which was written in a completely different time. You can be moral, modest AND wear pants. Trust me, if you saw what I'm wearing today (oversized T-shirt and knee length denim shorts) I do not look sexy at all. But homeboy says I'm dressed immodestly. Hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 10, 2022 Share Posted April 10, 2022 I wear a lot of leggings ,because ,well it is comfortable to work with kids. But apparently I am supposed to wear long skirts according to this woman . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted April 10, 2022 Author Share Posted April 10, 2022 19 minutes ago, Seraphim said: I wear a lot of leggings ,because ,well it is comfortable to work with kids. But apparently I am supposed to wear long skirts according to this woman . She can wear all the long skirts she wants. But no need to be judgmental of others. That to me is not a Christian attitude. I wonder how unhappy these people are. To always be looking for others' wrongdoing. I imagine they're miserable. And I'm happy in my T-shirt and shorts, enjoying the sunshine. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 10, 2022 Share Posted April 10, 2022 23 minutes ago, boltnrun said: She can wear all the long skirts she wants. But no need to be judgmental of others. That to me is not a Christian attitude. I wonder how unhappy these people are. To always be looking for others' wrongdoing. I imagine they're miserable. And I'm happy in my T-shirt and shorts, enjoying the sunshine. I agree, as a Catholic I don’t bring my own religious beliefs into other people’s lives. That is our little family’s belief and we keep it there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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