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boltnrun
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My clothes smelled like Lysol lol.  Fortunately I wasn't around anyone because I smelled like a freshly disinfected OR.

I threw out a bunch of trash both at the old place and the new place.  So much trash!

I need to go back to the old place today to get my plants and a few misc. items.  I am leaving a pile of donation items hoping they donate them and don't just throw them away.  I simply don't have the bandwidth to find a donation center and take them.  I am leaving a couple of pillows in the alley for the homeless to use, however.  Those are not eligible for donations but they're in great condition and the homeless can use them.

Today and next week I can focus on putting things away and hanging my art and decor.

I am living on my dream street.  I always (well, since I moved to this city and got to know it better) wanted to live on this exact street in this exact neighborhood.  It's like a dream come true.

My only concern is I have a cut on my hand that isn't healing.  It's been a week and it's still infected and itching and hurting.  I know a cut that won't heal is a potential sign of cancer so if it doesn't heal in the next few days I'll have to go to urgent care.

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Ugh...

My cousin's husband who sent me a "D" pic a few months ago just tried to video call me. I don't even want to imagine what he wanted to show me over video. My cousin had told me he was doing pretty good as long as he took his meds. I wonder if he stopped taking them. For her sake I hope not. But he has zero reason to video call me. 

Now I'm upset.

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We're getting rain off and on. My arthritis was just awful over the weekend. I tried to go for a walk but my feet were in terrible pain. I forced myself to walk for a half hour and then gave up. Also have a headache. BUT...I am sleeping really well. I'm even sleeping all the way through to my alarm.

I put up some of my decor on the walls and on my shelves. Still have some work to do but it's starting to look homey.

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I'm a BIG believer in voting. In fact, I basically want nothing to do with anyone who says (and believes) "Aw, I don't bother voting. It's just one vote, it won't make a difference! All politicians are a-holes anyway." And then they complain about things like crime, poorly maintained streets, the police or lack thereof, low wages or the prices of rent and goods. 

I don't worship politicians (and an bemused by anyone who does) but I do have those I think would do a better job than others. Regardless of party affiliation.

So yes, I absolutely voted. You betcha!

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1 hour ago, boltnrun said:

I'm a BIG believer in voting. In fact, I basically want nothing to do with anyone who says (and believes) "Aw, I don't bother voting. It's just one vote, it won't make a difference! All politicians are a-holes anyway." And then they complain about things like crime, poorly maintained streets, the police or lack thereof, low wages or the prices of rent and goods. 

I don't worship politicians (and an bemused by anyone who does) but I do have those I think would do a better job than others. Regardless of party affiliation.

So yes, I absolutely voted. You betcha!

I believe voting matters as well . People died for us to have that right . 

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I am truly thankful to be living in this state. There are a few states where I would never live and won't even visit.

My cousins relocated to a certain state about 12 years ago. They low key tried to talk me into moving there. There's no way. Never. Uh uh. Big time NOPE.

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My son once again has to quarantine and test for Covid. He's been at his new job for less than three months and they've had three Covid outbreaks. They keep demanding they work in the office full time. And every time they return there's another outbreak.

He's had to test so many times he ran out of home tests. I gave him some of mine. But he didn't want to possibly expose me so I had to leave them on my doorstep for him. We had plans for a family brunch tomorrow and now he can't come.

There's zero reason why his department can't work remotely. But another department complained so they're making them come in.

I hope he finds another job soon because this place needs to either protect them or let them work remotely and they're doing neither.

My company has some people working in person yet...no Covid outbreaks. And that's because we're under strict orders to stay the hell home if we have any symptoms.

The county both of our offices is in has declared a health state of emergency because their ERs and hospitals are overloaded with Covid, flu and RSV patients. I seem to be the only one who's not surprised there's another outbreak. Holiday season means outbreaks. It's happened the past two years and this year will be no different. Except it might be worse this year with no safety requirements in place.

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People who want to get into arguments on Twitter or other forms of social media 🙄  I understand that for a lot of people Twitter is literally their only form of social interaction.  But these people need to go outside once in a while.  There's a guy who tried to argue with me on Twitter early last week.  I declined and left the conversation on Tuesday.  He's still posting replies to that same thread.  I guess he's hoping I'll agree to be his online girlfriend or something.  Jeez...

A lot of discussion about dating and what people are looking for in a potential partner has been happening lately.  So I thought I'd make my list of what I'd be looking for if I was wanting to date (which I'm currently not).  Some of these things are musts even though some are in fact superficial.

-MUST like sports.  American football is mandatory.  Other sports can be included but if he's not into NFL he's a nope.  And he cannot try to make plans on a Sunday during football season unless it's to come over to watch the games or to go to a sports bar together.

-Be competitive, but not overly.  I want someone who wants to win but not at any and all costs.  One of my friends says he doesn't care if he wins at sports as long as he's having fun.  I don't want him on my team because I play to win.  HOWEVER, don't be a baby if you lose.  You can be disappointed and even a bit angry, but don't be a "d*ck" about it. No fights!

-Be gainfully employed full time unless you're receiving some kind of pension or are on disability.  I don't care what job you have, just be making an honest living.

-Don't be locked into gender roles.  Don't sit in a lazy boy chair with the remote in your hand expecting me to bring you your sandwich and beer.  Or if I offer to do so, offer to clean up after.  And don't expect me to collect your trash and dirty dishes.  You can do that yourself.  I can fix the toilet and you can wash dishes.  Don't get weird about it.

-Be willing to disagree respectfully. Don't try to get me to change my mind or tell me I'm "wrong" about my fundamental beliefs.  A discussion about where to eat is one thing, trying to convince me to change to your political or faith mindset is another.  Don't. 

-Be willing to try new things.   If you really don't want something I won't insist because that's disrespectful, and don't insist I try something if I say no.  But at least be open minded about things you've never done.

-Be polite to wait staff and employees.  Say "please" and "thank you".

-Don't bombard me with texts.  That's so lame.  

-Don't say things like "all people are a-holes".  I don't need that negativity in my life.

-Vote!  Anyone who says they don't bother voting will be summarily dismissed.  

-Greet the day with positivity.  I wake up in the morning and once the sun comes up I like to think to myself "wow, it's so beautiful outside!" or "we really need this rain".  It's not possibly to be Suzy Sunshine 24/7 (and I find that annoying too!) but I prefer to enjoy myself and be happy instead of always finding something negative to complain about.

-Feel free to call me out if I am slipping into excessively complaining and being negative.  I do tend to do this even when I think I'm being positive.  Don't make light of my true issues, but it's OK to say "you've been complaining for an hour.  Maybe we can find something to be thankful for".  

I'm sure there's more, and I could probably go on for hours.  But that's enough for now.

Back to football!  None of the games currently on are all that interesting but I do still enjoy watching, especially when I don't care about the outcome.

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I forgot to add to my list, absolutely no drug use. Alcohol in moderation is fine but no getting sloppy drunk and definitely no aggressive drunks. And I'm not a fan of pot. My brother smokes and I see him change from a articulate, lively man to his chin resting on his chest and unintelligible slurring and mumbling. I don't like it.

Also, anyone who uses offensive slurs to describe groups of people will be removed from my life. Period, end of.

Different topic. If I took a Covid test every time I had flu like symptoms I'd be testing nearly every day. No doctor has ever been able to determine why I feel like I have the flu 75% of the time. 

Short work week! I am alone Thanksgiving day but will be celebrating with family Friday. I will spend the actual holiday doing laundry and watching football. 

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Blech.

I've been feeling sick since Wednesday. Not Covid, I tested.  And I can't imagine where I would have picked it up anyway.

A big event for small business Saturday is taking place downtown.  I'd love to go but number one, I don't feel well, number two, I don't think I should be around crowds when I'm sick.  Even though I don't believe I have anything contagious.  And number three, while I'm glad I moved out of downtown, it was very convenient to attend downtown events when I lived there!  I could just walk. Now I have to drive and try to find a spot to park my car.  Not sure I'm up for that.

Oh!  And the shirt I ordered for my nephew's birthday was the wrong size!  The package had the right size on it but when he opened it, it was two sizes smaller.  Someone effed up.  Now I have to return it and order a new one.

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Finally started feeling better Saturday. Felt OK yesterday. And...then the insomnia returned last night. First it was too hot so I turned off the heater. Then the arthritis in my feet started hurting really bad because it was due to rain today. So maybe got three hours total in 15 minute segments.

I'm still in my pajamas and robe (thank you, work from home!) I have my biweekly 1:1 with my manager today but thankfully I don't have to be on camera.

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Slept lousy last night too. Sigh.

I'm really starting to worry about my brother. He's forgetting long, detailed conversations we have had. He forgets things I just told him. And he says things like he never heard them before when I literally just got done telling him the exact same thing. He doesn't seem to realize it either. He honestly thinks the conversations never happened. If it gets any worse I'm going to have to suggest he see his doctor. Which he'll fight because he hates going to the doctor.

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What a day.

Didn't sleep great. Super busy with work of course on the day I chose to do a load of laundry (not blaming work but rather my poor timing!). Then looked up and saw a trail of ants along the wall close to my ceiling. Spent about two hours trying to kill the filthy creatures and block their entrance. Told my brother and his (not) helpful suggestion was to use a flame (fire) to get them to leave. Well, yeah, burning down the building would probably eliminate the ant problem. Another example of why I have fears about his cognitive abilities. I'll have to go to the hardware store this weekend and buy some putty to seal up the several hundred cracks and holes in the stucco. Also need to search for a nest (probably inside my walls somewhere 🙄 )

Ugh, what a day. And I'm out of beer. I planned to walk today but I am not motivated (yeah, yeah, exercise helps with poor mood and stress and produces endorphins blah blah).

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Ants have left for now. I didn't have any putty so I used toothpaste 😆 I would think ants would like toothpaste but apparently they do not.

It's raining and I feel like drinking hot tea and hot cocoa and just lounging around.

Tomorrow I am going to try to do all my Christmas shopping. Going local to support small businesses. Walmart and Target don't need my money.

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I'm going Christmas shopping today.  Should be fun, right?  Well, I am full of anxiety.  Because of my irrational fears I am frankly pretty terrified. 

I wrote out a long post detailing what it is I'm afraid of but I'm too embarrassed to post it.

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27 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

I'm about to head out.  Anxiety is spiking badly.  But don't they say courage isn't not being afraid, it's being afraid and doing it anyway.

I'm going to be courageous. Even if it kills me.

Bolt!

You'll be more than fine! Nothing is realistically going to happen!

Enjoy your festive shopping! Maybe once you get this busy time out of the way today you'll feel better about doing it more often, and the anxiety will subside the more you face your fear?

Best,

x

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