She left to another province to get her perm. residency

[Quebecer1974]

Hi I met this woman on a dating app.... I'm 47 her 39. Basically when we met on  this app she had told me she would be in my province for 6 months only and would have to move to another province given she has a goal to be a Canadian. Given the pandemic I said ok and we started seeing each other quite frequently. Well we clicked really well and the relationship just got better and better. She then extended her stay because she was able to study only in another province. During our time she hinted a few times that if I marry her she would stay but I told her there must be another way ....although this is the province she really wants to stay in, it is also the hardest given more language requirements. she ended up staying almost 11 months. During that time time both of us developed feelings for each other and only had 4 days that were ackward with the rest of the time being a breeze and fun. She left in sept 2021 and we have chatted, exchanged racy pictures, talked and had virtual sex until the calls started to be more distant both ways because the idea is that we had to move on.  Now In january she told me she had been approached by a guy and she says she will meet him. It has been a week since then and I have been feeling very sad almost asking myself if I should have just married her. However, I'm sad because had she said I'll stay in this province with you....I would have probably married her. But she did seem to have that option open given the restrictions and best option in getting her papers. She said I was exactly her type, that the sex was amazing and she found we really clicked together... so if love trumps all I did not see it here UNLESS I missing something.

Just writting this in case someone has some input on the situation.

 

[SooSad33]

She admitted she'd only be in your province only about half a  year, then it was extended a bit longer.

Should you have agreed to marry? No.

Less than a year involved is not enough time to see how they really are.  A couple needs more time than that to see IF they are truly compatible. ( Usually honeymoon phase lasts at least 6 + months).

I suggest you count your blessings that she's moved on and you did not have to give in like that!

I am sorry if you got caught up in her.. and now she's moving on 😕 .

But see this as an experience.  Be cautious with those who have travelled for studying, etc.

 

[Rose Mosse]

1 hour ago, Quebecer1974 said:

Now In january she told me she had been approached by a guy and she says she will meet him. It has been a week since then and I have been feeling very sad almost asking myself if I should have just married her.

 

You know what to do. This is where the road forks off and you start taking better care of yourself. You are now going separate ways. Bid her well and remove any contact with her. 

You still have feelings for her so the play by play updates about how she's meeting other guys is going to hurt you.

What you're wrestling with are what ifs but this was never meant to last without some very unreasonable and unrealistic commitments like marriage way before you both were ever ready for it.