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Unexpected date ?? What the heck happened ?


Jessie_ay
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2 hours ago, smackie9 said:

You rejected him/blew him off for about 3 years...he got a date, ended the date early to rub rejection in your face...like he finally got back at you. Guy has creep factor all over him.

Your right ! I honestly don’t think it was rejection though. He probably wasn’t interested. How can someone want to meet up with you just to get payback ? After all of this . 

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39 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

Your right ! I honestly don’t think it was rejection though. He probably wasn’t interested. How can someone want to meet up with you just to get payback ? After all of this . 

Just like how can someone decide to meet up with someone who has blocked them and been pushy out of curiosity and pity? Same general concept.

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Posted (edited)
17 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Just like how can someone decide to meet up with someone who has blocked them and been pushy out of curiosity and pity? Same general concept.

Why do you think he asked me do I get a lot of compliments? 

Edited by Jessie_ay
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1 minute ago, Jessie_ay said:

I’ve blocked him for months at a time he’s always found a way to contact me. 

No no.  I mean you think it's shocking he'd meet you for pay back.  But I think it's shocking that you met him at all.  That's why I wrote the scenario because just like you are shocked that perhaps he met you for "pay back" -isn't it shocking that you chose to meet this person in the same way?

He didn't find a way to contact you.  You allowed it.  Sure he might have found a way for the first time.  It takes two.  You could have blocked him.  You weren't passive in this.  There's great value to you in figuring out why you kept letting this person into your life.

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6 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

No no.  I mean you think it's shocking he'd meet you for pay back.  But I think it's shocking that you met him at all.  That's why I wrote the scenario because just like you are shocked that perhaps he met you for "pay back" -isn't it shocking that you chose to meet this person in the same way?

He didn't find a way to contact you.  You allowed it.  Sure he might have found a way for the first time.  It takes two.  You could have blocked him.  You weren't passive in this.  There's great value to you in figuring out why you kept letting this person into your 

Nope he would be blocked ! He would leave me alone for like a month or two then text me from a different number. 

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1 hour ago, Jessie_ay said:

Nope he would be blocked ! He would leave me alone for like a month or two then text me from a different number. 

Did you respond when he exhibited this strange and frankly concerning behavior?

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17 minutes ago, waffle said:

He's looking for someone with low self-esteem that he can manipulate and control.

So he asked me that cause he thinks I get a lot of compliments? 
 

or he’s hoping I didn’t? 
 

 

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1 hour ago, Jessie_ay said:

Nope not until recently… 

So you did respond. 

You also said you "like" him. So his strange tactics to get your attention and to get you to date him succeeded.

It seems like you're hurt or upset that he abruptly ended your date with him. 

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4 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

So you did respond. 

You also said you "like" him. So his strange tactics to get your attention and to get you to date him succeeded.

It seems like you're hurt or upset that he abruptly ended your date with him. 

Nope I said I kinda started to like him ! This was before I met him….. when I met him I was uninterested, I was on my phone a lot and barely made eye contact with him . 

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8 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

Nope I said I kinda started to like him ! This was before I met him….. when I met him I was uninterested, I was on my phone a lot and barely made eye contact with him . 

Why would you be on your phone when you meet someone in person (other than for an emergency).  Don't you think that's a bit rude? What do you mean by "like" - as in you were intrigued because he was so full of drama and acting a bit like a train wreck? What did you like about him as a person -what qualities about him did you like?  What did you have in common so that you wanted to meet him in person . Above you wrote you met him because you were curious.  Not because you liked things about him.

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54 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Why would you be on your phone when you meet someone in person (other than for an emergency).  Don't you think that's a bit rude? What do you mean by "like" - as in you were intrigued because he was so full of drama and acting a bit like a train wreck? What did you like about him as a person -what qualities about him did you like?  What did you have in common so that you wanted to meet him in person . Above you wrote you met him because you were curious.  Not because you liked things about him.

Exactly I was curious!

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So he was normal in one way, leaving early when the person he was on a date with was being rude, paying attention to her phone and showing no interest in him. And now you're perplexed he left early and think of it as some huge mystery?

If you're having such a dry spell that you start be curious about stalkers, who sneak in through the back door after you've blocked, maybe look at your own behavior in why you're not attracting mentally healthy men, or why maybe those men have asked you out but then made a quick exit. Even if you're not interested in a person, it's crappy to be rude about it. Get through a date showing a person respect regardless, and then be gentle but firm about not accepting another date.

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10 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

I met him I was uninterested, I was on my phone a lot and barely made eye contact with him . 

This poor guy chases you for 3 years, finally gets on a date with you. You were on your phone a lot, barely looked at him, and you were uninterested. And yet you wonder why he cut the date short.

Seriously??

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16 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

Your right ! I honestly don’t think it was rejection though. He probably wasn’t interested. How can someone want to meet up with you just to get payback ? After all of this . 

Because he's a weirdo.

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1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

Right. So it's not because you liked him as a person.  And then when you met him you ignored him in favor of your phone.

No I was on my phone for a little bit he was on his too and we were laughing at funny videos. 

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24 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

No I was on my phone for a little bit he was on his too and we were laughing at funny videos. 

 

15 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

when I met him I was uninterested, I was on my phone a lot and barely made eye contact with him . 

Which is it?

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On 1/6/2022 at 10:18 PM, Jessie_ay said:

So he asked me that cause he thinks I get a lot of compliments? 
 

or he’s hoping I didn’t? 
 

 

I would think the latter.  So that he can be the one to build up your self-esteem.

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18 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

I don’t have low self esteem. I’m very beautiful and get loads of attention 

Then what this guy did shouldn't bother you.

I know, you're "just wondering".  My conclusion is this guy is weird.  Keep dating him if you want but don't be surprised when he continues to act weird.

Also, you didn't answer my previous question.  I'm curious to know which version is the correct one.

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