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Unexpected date ?? What the heck happened ?


Jessie_ay
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10 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

Really we’re both college age so I would think he would have women ? 

But look at his behaviour around you... made you uncomfortable. So, if there's something really off about this guy, is possible he can't keep a woman around.  

You'll meet all kinds in this great big world 😉 .

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51 minutes ago, SooSad33 said:

But look at his behaviour around you... made you uncomfortable. So, if there's something really off about this guy, is possible he can't keep a woman around.  

You'll meet all kinds in this great big world 😉 .

On the way back to my car he kept rubbing my legs asking if I was okay . As he drove off he waved and gave me a weird stare lol

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20 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

On the way back to my car he kept rubbing my legs asking if I was okay . As he drove off he waved and gave me a weird stare lol

I wouldn't agonize over why or what happened.  I would just be relieved to be rid of this creep and hopefully never see or hear from him again.

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39 minutes ago, melancholy123 said:

Something weird and wrong with this guy.  I hope you block and delete him from all forms of contacting you.  He sounds creepy.

Well yeah he never contacted me ! Maybe he got the hint 

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2 hours ago, Capricorn3 said:

I wouldn't agonize over why or what happened.  I would just be relieved to be rid of this creep and hopefully never see or hear from him again.

Everyone keeps saying creep ? You guys are all probably right 

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5 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

Nope cause I wouldn’t pay attention to him. 
over the last 6 months we started to get know each other by phone. He would beg me for dates but I was busy with other guys . Plus he would block me if I didn’t answer fast enough and etc. I knew I was relocating far from him , and I got tired of him telling me I was leading him on plus I started to like him so I went on the date.

So what about him begging you and blocking you turned into you "liking" him -what about that sort of behavior turned you on? 

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14 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

So what about him begging you and blocking you turned into you "liking" him -what about that sort of behavior turned you on? 

 Definitely not. I wanted to see what he was about in person 

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24 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

 Definitely not. I wanted to see what he was about in person 

Again - why would you want to meet someone in person who had behaved in these ways towards you and over a long period of time "chased" you even though you ignored him.  What would meeting in person change about how he treated you?  Were you curious as to whether you'd be physically attracted to him even though - I assume you recognized this -it was in your face so to speak- he treated you in an inappropriate and disrespectful way?

Also why the surprise that he acted inappropriately in person when for months he acted inappropriately over text and you showed him you tolerated it -he was pushy, he blocked you -you came back for more and more and more.

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27 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Again - why would you want to meet someone in person who had behaved in these ways towards you and over a long period of time "chased" you even though you ignored him.  What would meeting in person change about how he treated you?  Were you curious as to whether you'd be physically attracted to him even though - I assume you recognized this -it was in your face so to speak- he treated you in an inappropriate and disrespectful way?

Also why the surprise that he acted inappropriately in person when for months he acted inappropriately over text and you showed him you tolerated it -he was pushy, he blocked you -you came back for more and more and more.

Your correct! Again I don’t want to blame my age on anything but I am fairly young . I want to just get it over with and leave it at that, I figured hey I’m moving anyways so why not meet him since it’s over. It was dumb  I agree , but it was definitely a learning experience. Now I know what to look out for ! I felt bad like hey this guy has been begging me for a date and I haven’t went out with him despite talking to him. 

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11 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

Your correct! Again I don’t want to blame my age on anything but I am fairly young . I want to just get it over with and leave it at that, I figured hey I’m moving anyways so why not meet him since it’s over. It was dumb  I agree , but it was definitely a learning experience. Now I know what to look out for ! I felt bad like hey this guy has been begging me for a date and I haven’t went out with him despite talking to him. 

I hope you learn that pity dates are never a good idea -and that's not what the other person is looking for.  Next time someone is chasing you like that ask yourself honestly whether you're partly flattered by the attention.  Figure out what motivates you to interact with a person like that.  You're lucky you weren't harmed by him.

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Yikes! 
 

Next time don’t entertain guys that ask for a date out of pity. If the guy seems off, it’s because  he is. I’m glad this guy is gone and it’s odd he pursues you to just ghost but thank the stars he did vanish. 
 

Remember you’re first gut instinct is always right. 

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1 hour ago, limichelle said:

Yikes! 
 

Next time don’t entertain guys that ask for a date out of pity. If the guy seems off, it’s because  he is. I’m glad this guy is gone and it’s odd he pursues you to just ghost but thank the stars he did vanish. 
 

Remember you’re first gut instinct is always right. 

Weird right ? At first I was thinking if it was because he wasn’t attracted to me ? But he kept staring at me and rubbing my face and calling me pretty. Maybe I was different from what he expected? I’m glad it happened like that though a blessing in disguise! 
 

he also looked really upset that I was moving far away ? He stated “just because your moving doesn’t mean we have to stop this “……. Then he ghosted he was also rude to! 
 

I’m glad it’s over just wanted some advice I felt like I was the only one thinking this whole thing was weird !

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Look, you crossed paths with a total creep. This date wasn't about you, it was about his ego and inability to accept rejection. He hounded you until you gave in and went out with him just to prove to himself that he can manipulate people and succeed. Sadly, he did succeed. He groped you around, was a creep, got what he wanted, and left. Mission accomplished, ego satisfied. In his mind, now he is the winner who "rejected" you when he cut the date short.

I hope he stays away, but don't be shocked if he resurfaces at some point. He now knows that you can be manipulated.

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Oh no! Rubbing your face? That’s just another layer of creepy! 
I’ve had really odd dates as well. I remember going on a date with this guy who burst into tears in the middle of us eating lunch. Then he shouted “ This date sucks!”  He then found me on Facebook four years later sending me a message asking to go on another date. Lol 

 

I think the problem is there’s so much emotional immaturity for people that they’re not ready to date. They need to face whatever problems they may have first. But they don’t,  using dating sites as a band aid. 
 

So us girls or guys get the creepy people crying or touching our face. I just tell you to be aware. 

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56 minutes ago, DancingFool said:

Look, you crossed paths with a total creep. This date wasn't about you, it was about his ego and inability to accept rejection. He hounded you until you gave in and went out with him just to prove to himself that he can manipulate people and succeed. Sadly, he did succeed. He groped you around, was a creep, got what he wanted, and left. Mission accomplished, ego satisfied. In his mind, now he is the winner who "rejected" you when he cut the date short.

I hope he stays away, but don't be shocked if he resurfaces at some point. He now knows that you can be manipulated.

Now that you put it like that your right !!!! 
 

he didn’t ghost because I never texted him after the date. So I guess it was a mutual ghost. 

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1 hour ago, limichelle said:

Oh no! Rubbing your face? That’s just another layer of creepy! 
I’ve had really odd dates as well. I remember going on a date with this guy who burst into tears in the middle of us eating lunch. Then he shouted “ This date sucks!”  He then found me on Facebook four years later sending me a message asking to go on another date. Lol 

 

I think the problem is there’s so much emotional immaturity for people that they’re not ready to date. They need to face whatever problems they may have first. But they don’t,  using dating sites as a band aid. 
 

So us girls or guys get the creepy people crying or touching our face. I just tell you to be aware. 

Yeah he rubbed my face and said “your very pretty you should be more confident”?? 
 

I was like I am ! He kept asking me why I was shy ??

I was like hello it’s are first time meeting 

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36 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

Yeah he rubbed my face and said “your very pretty you should be more confident”?? 

And this didn't creep you out?

I have to be honest, in reading your posts, it sounds like you were flattered by his attention but hurt that he bailed early and didn't contact you again. 

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36 minutes ago, MissCanuck said:

And this didn't creep you out?

I have to be honest, in reading your posts, it sounds like you were flattered by his attention but hurt that he bailed early and didn't contact you again. 

No no no !!!!! I was confused not hurt …. And I was definitely not flattered! I was trying to make sense out of all of this. 

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58 minutes ago, Jessie_ay said:

No no no !!!!! I was confused not hurt …. And I was definitely not flattered! I was trying to make sense out of all of this. 

But how he acted was consistent with how he acted toward you before -disrespectful and pushy.  Makes perfect sense, no?

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This is a reminder to trust your instincts the first time around. No decoding of his behaviour is needed. It was self-explanatory from start to finish.

You were too trusting, hoping for a different outcome. Take care of yourself especially if you’re meeting strangers or dating like this. 

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16 hours ago, Jessie_ay said:

No no no !!!!! I was confused not hurt …. And I was definitely not flattered! I was trying to make sense out of all of this. 

He acted like a total weirdo before you even met (manipulating you by blocking, etc.)

And he continued to act like a weirdo when you met. 

You won't be able to make sense out of it unless you're a weirdo yourself (which you're not) The only take-away is to have better boundaries for yourself so you don't continue to interact with men who behaved this one did before even meeting you. 

 

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