I suck at breaking the ice.

[KrosBone]

I need some advice. I don't feel right doing this but I don't know what else to do. I know there's no one thing that fixes all. I have no idea how to approach and I would hate to pay for a dating coach when that probably won't work. I just don't know what to do or say to get what I want in a relationship. I don't have any friends and I don't have a place to myself. This has been the hardest thing for me to get around. I've tried online speed dating and online dating. No luck.

[Batya33]

Please be more specific.  Also are you interested in people -what makes them tick, their stories, what they like to do, dislike? What kinds of questions do you ask when you're trying to get to know someone?

[waffle]

On 12/22/2021 at 11:13 PM, KrosBone said:

I just don't know what to do or say to get what I want in a relationship.

You seem to have a handle (at least internally) on what you want someone else to provide for you, but what do you have to offer?

[smackie9]

Have to ask yourself...would you date someone like you?

For one thing you need self improvement with your attitude, your out look on life, and self love/confidence. If you feel awkward and negative, that is the impression these potential dates have of you. I would suggest a life coach, not a dating coach. I hope you are working with a therapist because you have a lot of anxiety, which is preventing you from having proper interactions with people. You need that in order to develop friendships and romantic relationships. There is definitely no quick fixes here.

[Jane67]

Try learning more about what makes you tick... 

Being happy in your own company and knowing who you are internally is the best way to find a partner. 

 

Our biggest challenge in life is relating to other people and making that connection happen. 

 

But most of the time we can seek connections outside of ourselves to try and fix the issues which we have to deal with from the past or previous relationship experience. 

 

Know what you want from a partner and what type of person you are attracted to... 

Is it someone with similar interests? Or cultural background? Would you be open to dating people who are the opposite of you? 

 

Like an introvert and a chatty extrovert? 🙂

 

THEN as you work out who you are everything will hopefully fall into place. 

 

Good luck! 

 

Some useful resources:

David Snyder videos on attraction.

https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/