Trigger sensitive topic. Update on where I’m at since the incident.

limichelle · December 11, 2021

Hello everyone,

I wanted to update everyone on how I’m doing five months since being raped.

I used to not understand the term survivor fully. I know now I’m indeed a survivor not only alive but a survivor mentally. I went to therapy for three intense months every week. I wasn’t going to let this destroy me.

Im doing a lot better and all I care about is what happens to myself not to him.

He may or may never get punished but that’s out of my hands. What I focus on is my well being. The case is still ongoing I recently found out as the rape kit was tested and is now under new investigation by the local police.

Im finding that I feel safe completely again. I’m going to the gym, out in public more.
I put up with less crap then I did before in the dating world. For a week I was back on the dating sites but I then decided to come off and approach it when I’m In a better place. But my interactions online were brief as I delete and blocked guys that were not being nice. I even told some of them I won’t tolerate anything anymore if we talked for a couple days and they got sexual. I know my boundaries.

Im still having weight loss surgery and I’m having it in April. So I don’t even want to think about dating until way after the surgery and I’m adjusting to my new lifestyle.

My resilience shocks me. I still don’t give up on finding love. I’m the eternal optimist my guy is out there.

Thank you all for your support on this forum it means so much.

Lambert · December 11, 2021

@limichelle

Thank you for sharing. Although not a journey you chose to undertake. I admire your strength and the compassion you've shown yourself.

True self love. Something I and many others strive to do, too. I love that you're pushing yourself but also redefining as needed.

I know your posts and story helps others.

Would you like to tell us about the surgery and the prep? I'd be interested in knowing more but up to you.

Share what feels right for you.

❤

Seraphim · December 11, 2021

❤️

limichelle · December 11, 2021

Hi Lambert!

I don’t mind sharing!

I have to stop my old eating habits starting now and that means a drastic diet change. I’ve cut out soda, bad carbs, I focus only on eating protein, vegetables and some fruit. I can have milk, cheese and yogurt still and healthy fats. I will have to start drinking protein shakes after the surgery.
I will stop drinking my water with meals so I get used to not being able too after surgery. I can have Crystal light so that makes me happy, it’s replaced soda.

So the surgeon does two procedures before the Gastric sleeve. The first is an endoscopy to see if my stomach can tolerate it and to see my liver. The second is to get rid of the hiatal hernia causing my GERD.

Then two weeks before surgery I eat a bland diet and that shrinks the liver to normal size.

I will loose estimate of 40-50 pounds in the first three months after the procedure. Then it tapers off.

it’s because I’ll be on a liquid diet for six weeks and then purée for one week and then solid liquids for one week. Then try solid food.

Im prepared and I’m ready. I’m anxious but I’m ready to sacrifice my unhealthy eating habits and food like pizza for life, so I can be healthy.

I work out with a personal trainer twice a week. Then I go to the gym twice on my own to do the workout she gives me on an app.

my goal is to loose twenty pounds by April. Im making it realistic.

Jibralta · December 11, 2021

12 hours ago, limichelle said:

Im finding that I feel safe completely again.

I'm so happy to hear this :)

reinventmyself · December 11, 2021

I am so sorry L. I was taking a bit of a break from here during the summer months and I missed your news. I admire your strength and sound really good in spite of that terrible experience. Stay strong!

Much admiration . . .

catfeeder · December 11, 2021

Dear Limichelle,
Yay, YOU!!!

Just as nobody deserves assault, nobody deserves the degree of suffering that they don't know how to avoid inflicting on themselves afterward.

You ARE resilient, and you are finding--and working--your own path, and you are inspiring.

Whenever you have a not-so-great day, remind yourself that we ALL have not-so-great times, and you are allowed to view any such moments as 'stuff' you will navigate in your own time.

It's never 'backsliding,' as nothing can take your progress away from you. It's always just unhealed places speaking their truth, and it's okay to not be perfect all of the time.

Healing is a process, and each and every stage of it matters--and not just to you. Every step you take in the right direction gives you the strength of experience to help the next person.

Every time you post here, you have no idea how many people you help.

Thank you for thinking of us!
Cat

Lambert · December 12, 2021

20 hours ago, limichelle said:

Hi Lambert!

I don’t mind sharing!

I have to stop my old eating habits starting now and that means a drastic diet change. I’ve cut out soda, bad carbs, I focus only on eating protein, vegetables and some fruit. I can have milk, cheese and yogurt still and healthy fats. I will have to start drinking protein shakes after the surgery.
I will stop drinking my water with meals so I get used to not being able too after surgery. I can have Crystal light so that makes me happy, it’s replaced soda.

So the surgeon does two procedures before the Gastric sleeve. The first is an endoscopy to see if my stomach can tolerate it and to see my liver. The second is to get rid of the hiatal hernia causing my GERD.

Then two weeks before surgery I eat a bland diet and that shrinks the liver to normal size.

I will loose estimate of 40-50 pounds in the first three months after the procedure. Then it tapers off.

it’s because I’ll be on a liquid diet for six weeks and then purée for one week and then solid liquids for one week. Then try solid food.

Im prepared and I’m ready. I’m anxious but I’m ready to sacrifice my unhealthy eating habits and food like pizza for life, so I can be healthy.

I work out with a personal trainer twice a week. Then I go to the gym twice on my own to do the workout she gives me on an app.

my goal is to loose twenty pounds by April. Im making it realistic.