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How to stop a relationship feeling like a friendship


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Hey, this is my first time doing this so bare with me.

I've gotten in to this new-ish relationship with a friend and it felt great at first and thankfully she helped me get over some barriers regarding sex that my ex left me with but ever since then it feels like she's become distant or more friend like. Unfortunately we have conflicting schedules with work and personal life. To make things worse an old friend that I used to have some intense feelings about has come back into my home town and from time to time I think about them. I feel like I need some sort of advice or just someone to tell me that everything is gonna be great.

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8 hours ago, Ozzy said:

 she helped me get over some barriers regarding sex that my ex left me with but ever since then it feels like she's become distant or more friend like. 

How long were you dating your ex? How long ago did you end things? What do you mean by "sexual barriers"?

Do you mean things ended because of sexual incompatibility?

As far as these friends, keep them as friends. 

Get a good profile and pics on quality dating apps and start talking to and meeting women for a coffee .

Start fresh. Don't mess up friendships by trying to get sexual with them.

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This is part of trying to change from friend to lover. There is no infatuation period, because you two know each other and already comfortable. Distance can make the heart grow fonder, but it also can cause a disconnect emotionally. To keep the home fires burning is to be spontaneous. Like a 5 minute date, sending a romantic card, order lunch for her, etc. Think outside the box.

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What is it.. the you want 'great'?

To be fully over an ex?  To get involved with your past interest?  Or to be able to progress with this new (ish) one?

Maybe YOU need to actually step back and take a breath.  Take some down time, on your own and heal a bit more, in order to feel 'okay' again, before you jump into something again & end up hurt again.

IMO, this new one sounds like your emotional pillow & sounding board.  People can only take so much of that.. so maybe this is what's happened with her? Could she be pulling away a bit because of this... or maybe you are seeing her in a different light, when she isn't seeing you that way at all.

I feel you should just see & accept her as is.  A friend & nothing more.

As I said, don't make any rash decisions at this time re: any further involvements, but get yourself back up to par. ( or you can end up with some deep regrets).  Focus on you for a while.  * Relationships have expectations and your mental & emotional stability is tested*.  Is possible you don't have all of that in a line yet.. correct?

 

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