Should I go on a trip

[makavelii]

This first part was writen more than a month ago.

Hello everybody.

Lets begin by saying that last 3 weeks were happiest but also saddest in my life. 

Everything started when I met this girl at the party, we chated on instagram before and had an opportunity to meet up. At that party we vibed a lot and she told me that really she likes me. I said the same and we basically were extremely  happy for the rest of the party which ended in 3 days. The problem was that she had a boyfriend and their relationship wasn’t that good. We decided to meet next day and talk sober. 

The next day I woke up and thought about it a lot and realized that what she was doing wasn’t right and againts my ideals ( when I think about it now, *** ideals). When we met I talked a lot about how it was not right what we were doing and pushed her a lot (which I regret now). She seemed really genuine but I refused to listen. After that day I talked a lot with many different people and started really regreting my words. I am not sure if it happened to any of you, but over time when I was thinking about her I started to miss her. Shen was that one perfect girl but I was too stupid to notice and now I think about her all day everyday. I occupied myself with many different activities but It’s not helping. 

After a week or so I couldn’t stand it and called her. I was going to say that I really liked her and wanted to ask her out on a date. When we started talking she mentioned that after our talk she went to her boyfriend to brake up, but they both got really emotional and they restarted their relationship. After those words my heart droped and I ended up wishing her good luck and saying goodbyes. Since that day I’m feeling extremely depressed ( started drinking more, but stoped now ). I basically can’t look at other girls anymore because they don’t look good enough. This feeling has been folowing me for weeks even until now.

Few days ago, I got invited to this birthday party and I found out that she is attending it too. When I found I got really mixed emotions. No matter how hard I don’t want to go and forget her, somehow I can’t fight my heart which wants to see her on every possible opportunity. I’m extremely lost and still fighting depression which might get even stronger after that party. If she comes with boyfriend it will be even harder, I’m afraid that I might get aggressive and say too much. 

Also recently she told me that she found a job in different country and is soon leaving. 

What should I do? Should I ignore her? confess to her? Maybe not even go. It’s really hard to think and decide at this state. I will probably get drunk there and leave deppresed but I still want to know what you think. 

Update:

Basically I didn’t go to that party where she was and we haven’t met since. Recently we got into argument and blocked each other, but yesterday was my birthday and she called me. We talked a little bit and are cool now. Today out of nowhere she messeged me and asked me to go with her on a trip around Europe. Should I go? Does this mean that she still likes me? I tried really hard to forget her but now this happend.

[Rose Mosse]

3 hours ago, makavelii said:

Basically I didn’t go to that party where she was and we haven’t met since. Recently we got into argument and blocked each other, but yesterday was my birthday and she called me. We talked a little bit and are cool now. Today out of nowhere she messeged me and asked me to go with her on a trip around Europe. Should I go? Does this mean that she still likes me? I tried really hard to forget her but now this happend.

What was the argument about? Is she still with her boyfriend? Ask her what her boyfriend thinks. If she's asking you to travel with her and just broke up again with her bf, she may be on the rebound again and that's not a great place for you to be in. This yo-yo or back and forth continues. 

I don't think she likes you as a person if you are arguing, haven't even met since the argument and then her proposing to travel with you. She seems unpredictable. 

[Wiseman2]

4 hours ago, makavelii said:

 I’m extremely lost and still fighting depression 

Today out of nowhere she messeged me and asked me to go with her on a trip around Europe. 

Sorry this happened. First go to a physician for an evaluation of your physical and mental health and get a referral to a qualified therapist for ongoing support.

Delete and block her and all her people from ALL your social media and messaging apps.

Do not go on a trip with her. It would be disastrous. She's bad news.

Spend more time focusing on yourself. Spend time with trusted friends and family.

Is this the same girl?:

 

[makavelii]

9 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Sorry this happened. First go to a physician for an evaluation of your physical and mental health and get a referral to a qualified therapist for ongoing support.

Delete and block her and all her people from ALL your social media and messaging apps.

Do not go on a trip with her. It would be disastrous. She's bad news.

Spend more time focusing on yourself. Spend time with trusted friends and family.

Is this the same girl?:

 

It is and I decided to go. She broke up.

[boltnrun]

So you want to get involved with a woman who you know shops for her next boyfriend while she's still in a relationship?

What if she does that to you? (Hint...she probably will, whether it's sneaking off to see the ex or a shiny new toy).

[catfeeder]

Are you willing to plunk down money for an expensive trip without at very least meeting up with her first to learn more about her--and how likely she might be to flake on you?

[makavelii]

she left her boyfriend now and is on tinder.

On 10/24/2021 at 8:48 PM, catfeeder said:

Are you willing to plunk down money for an expensive trip without at very least meeting up with her first to learn more about her--and how likely she might be to flake on you?

 

[boltnrun]

3 minutes ago, makavelii said:

she left her boyfriend now and is on tinder.

 

Yep, she's out shopping.

Does she expect you to pay for this trip she wants you to go on with her?

[makavelii]

9 hours ago, boltnrun said:

Yep, she's out shopping.

Does she expect you to pay for this trip she wants you to go on with her?

Not really, or at least I don’t think so. 

[MissCanuck]

On 10/22/2021 at 3:05 AM, makavelii said:

Today out of nowhere she messeged me and asked me to go with her on a trip around Europe. Should I go?

Nope, terrible idea. 

She wants to use you for company and affection since her now-ex-boyfriend is no longer going but she will discard you the moment the trip is over. 

Be smarter about this, OP. 

[Wiseman2]

55 minutes ago, makavelii said:

Not really, or at least I don’t think so. 

Well get organized. Figure out who pays for what exactly. Where you are going, where you are staying, what each of you have in mind about it what to do,etc.

Make sure you are crystal clear whether it's separate rooms/beds.

Sounds like she's not well thought out and just wants someone to split costs with.

If she wanted to have sex with you,it would be happening without this trip.

[makavelii]

5 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Well get organized. Figure out who pays for what exactly. Where you are going, where you are staying, what each of you have in mind about it what to do,etc.

Make sure you are crystal clear whether it's separate rooms/beds.

Sounds like she's not well thought out and just wants someone to split costs with.

If she wanted to have sex with you,it would be happening without this trip.

3 of us ( 1 more friend is coming) are staying in 1 room. It is pretty much a party trip. I already agreed but Its weird how I got invited after everything and we also had arguments and stuff prior. I’m curious if its 

a) she wants to be friends and to travel, party and stuff together.

or

b) she misses me after all this time and still likes me.

I was close to forgeting her until this offer. We did have a nice time at the party we met for the first time. Many of you think that she’s a bad person but its not the case. She’s having her own issues. 

My plan is to end it during this trip. I’ll talk with her and maybe invite her to a date ( if she still sees me this way). If not we’ll stay friends but I will gradually end our relationship. 

[Wiseman2]

2 minutes ago, makavelii said:

3 of us ( 1 more friend is coming) are staying in 1 room.

a) she wants to be friends and to travel, party and stuff together.

Sounds like a)

[makavelii]

1 minute ago, Wiseman2 said:

Sounds like a)

yea I think so too 

[Kwothe28]

I can tell you from the get-go its a terrible idea. You are expecting something to happen. While sinking money into possibly the long trip around Europe with the person you barely know. Which possibly just invited you because she needed somebody to share expenses and she knew you will "bite". If you get dissapointed along the way you will still have to share a room with her. It has "disaster" written all over it. It wouldnt be a terrible idea if you were going just to have fun, maybe even hook up with some other girl on the trip. But you are going specifically because of her. That wont end well.

[makavelii]

2 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

I can tell you from the get-go its a terrible idea. You are expecting something to happen. While sinking money into possibly the long trip around Europe with the person you barely know. Which possibly just invited you because she needed somebody to share expenses and she knew you will "bite". If you get dissapointed along the way you will still have to share a room with her. It has "disaster" written all over it. It wouldnt be a terrible idea if you were going just to have fun, maybe even hook up with some other girl on the trip. But you are going specifically because of her. That wont end well.

Yea I’m going to have fun, party and stuff it’s a great opportunity for me. I ain’t paying for her stuff. But also I’m going to get everything strait with her so it could end. I think this trip will be amazing.

[smackie9]

Dude take a buddy and hit the clubs/have fun. Having her there is going to ruin your trip.