Well that was embarrassing… 🙈

[MsAin1st]

Last night the guy I’ve been getting to know    invited me over to hang at his house to watch a Halloween movie. We were sitting together and I snuggled into him and fell asleep (embarrassing part #1). He woke me up when the movie was over and I said “Oh God Frank, I’m sorry I fell asleep!” So embarrassing part #2 is I called him the wrong name. I felt crappy as soon as it happened and apologized, but he brushed it off and was like “well that’ll probably happen every now and again.” 
 

I am super embarrassed by these things.

I don’t want him to feel like I was bored… in fact I was just comfortable and felt really relaxed with him. And secondly, do I need to say anything about calling him the wrong name or just let it go? 

[Rose Mosse]

It's ok. Not a big deal. If you're tired, you might want to excuse yourself and head home instead of staying up and watching a movie in future. I doubt he thinks you were bored. It's not a crime to doze off. 

What did he mean by "that'll probably happen every now and again"? It seems a bit rude for an honest mistake. Let it go and don't bring it up again. Try to remember his name.

[melancholy123]

Let it go!

[lostandhurt]

Right now the falling asleep thing is not that big of a deal.  Calling him by the wrong name shows him you are not that into him even if you are.

Don't bring any of these things up but it is time for you to step up and go the extra mile with him.  Invite him to dinner and make sure he knows it is your treat.  Show interest in what he feels is important and listen when he talks don't just wait for your turn to talk.

  He may ask who Frank is so be prepared.  I was once dating a woman named Tonya and had dated a woman named Tasha very recently.  My nephew told me "Uncle Lost, you are totally going to call Tonya Tasha one day" He was right and it happened at an outdoor concert when I was introducing her to some friends we ran into. I immediately corrected myself but on the way home I got the "Who the hell is Tasha?"  I simply answered "a friend" and that was the end of it.  I didn't make a big deal out of it and she let it go. 

 Stuff happens and everyone makes mistakes, you are human right?

 Reach out to him and ask him to dinner, just don't let it go to long before you do.

  Lost

[Jibralta]

6 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

Right now the falling asleep thing is not that big of a deal.  Calling him by the wrong name shows him you are not that into him even if you are.

I agree. I don't think that falling asleep is a big deal. I think it's actually kind of nice. It shows that you're comfortable.

The name error is a bigger deal, but I agree that you can probably minimize/negate that slip-up by demonstrating your genuine interest in him (e.g., chatting him up, asking him out again in the very near future, etc). Calling someone by the wrong name is usually a forgivable error in the very beginning of things. 

6 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

I was once dating a woman named Tonya and had dated a woman named Tasha very recently.  My nephew told me "Uncle Lost, you are totally going to call Tonya Tasha one day" He was right and it happened at an outdoor concert when I was introducing her to some friends we ran into. I immediately corrected myself but on the way home I got the "Who the hell is Tasha?"  I simply answered "a friend" and that was the end of it.  I didn't make a big deal out of it and she let it go.

I was part of something like this once. But it was me running into an old ex boyfriend and his new girlfriend. He introduced his girlfriend to me as "Jibralta," and I said, "Wow, Jay, you sure like Jibraltas." He said, "Oh my god, Stephanie. This is Stephanie." His girlfriend did not look very pleased lol. 

[catfeeder]

On 10/21/2021 at 6:39 PM, Rose Mosse said:

What did he mean by "that'll probably happen every now and again"? It seems a bit rude for an honest mistake. Let it go and don't bring it up again. Try to remember his name.

That comment doesn't come off as rude to me, but rather forgiving. He's normalizing the thing so you won't feel lousy, AND he sounds predictive as though he intends to keep seeing you.

I wouldn't sweat this. 

[Wiseman2]

On 10/21/2021 at 6:36 PM, MsAin1st said:

he brushed it off and was like “well that’ll probably happen every now and again.” 

He's the one who you met through mutual friends and knows about your late fiancé? 

He sounds like a keeper. He handled it with humor and graciousness. Don't apologize again. Just carry on as usual.

[MsAin1st]

Yes, Wiseman. It’s him. We’ve been very slowly getting to know each other. That was the first time we’ve seen each other somewhere not public or without mutual friends present. 
We've only talked on the phone or texted since Wednesday night because he works weekend night shifts, but you’re right, he was so gentle with what he said. Guess I’m silly to be worried. I like him a lot and don’t want to mess things up. 
 

I was 18 when I met Frank, so this will basically be my first real “adult” relationship. Honestly, it’s kind of scary! I just want it to go well. 

Thanks 😊 

[tattoobunnie]

I have fallen asleep to couch and in the theater movies on dates a plenty...they won't care!

[Batya33]

Just don't watch Young Frank-enstein next time!

[Batya33]

2 minutes ago, MsAin1st said:

I didn’t bother changing his name or using an initial since he’s not alive. I had posted previously and I think that’s where others knew that he’d passed away. 
Honestly,  I read your comment after a long & crummy work day and it made me laugh. I knew there was no I’ll intent behind it. 

Thanks for standing up for me! That’s one of the reasons I like coming on here to read things! Most of the commenters seem respectful, helpful and honest! 
 

💙 O

I had no idea and I am very sorry for your loss. I’m so glad you took the comment on the spirit in which it was intended. Pun intended

! I too really appreciate those who are supportive and I love how the moderators have set up specific procedure so that people can feel comfortable reporting all sorts of inappropriate posts in a way that is efficient and also factors in the need for discretion and treating all with respect.  

Again thanks so much for taking my comment as intended.  What you described is really not a big deal. Embarrassing for sure but not a big deal.  Have a good evening. 

[lostandhurt]

So did you contact him?  Have you done anything to let him know you are interested and excited to see him again?

If you want something don't just wait for others to decide for you, you have to make things happen in your life.

  There is a huge learning curve when you haven't dated in a long time so trust you gut and do what is right for you but don't just let things happen.  Strong smart women are super sexy so don't let old society thinking slow you down.

  Have you talked to him since that evening?

Lost

[MsAin1st]

6 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

So did you contact him?  Have you done anything to let him know you are interested and excited to see him again?

If you want something don't just wait for others to decide for you, you have to make things happen in your life.

  There is a huge learning curve when you haven't dated in a long time so trust you gut and do what is right for you but don't just let things happen.  Strong smart women are super sexy so don't let old society thinking slow you down.

  Have you talked to him since that evening?

Lost

I have talked to him!
We went for a run together Sunday morning when he was finished working. I asked him to food trucks & mini-golf for Tuesday evening. We had a lot of fun. He did mention me falling asleep, but it was in a fun, teasing manner. He was playful but caring the whole time and kissed my cheek when he dropped me off at home. 

I am going to his house on Sunday for trick-or-treating. His street makes a big deal of it so it should be fun! 

[Batya33]

45 minutes ago, MsAin1st said:

I have talked to him!
We went for a run together Sunday morning when he was finished working. I asked him to food trucks & mini-golf for Tuesday evening. We had a lot of fun. He did mention me falling asleep, but it was in a fun, teasing manner. He was playful but caring the whole time and kissed my cheek when he dropped me off at home. 

I am going to his house on Sunday for trick-or-treating. His street makes a big deal of it so it should be fun! 

Oh nice !! Make sure he’s fair about divvying up the candy !!  I’m glad it all worked out. You can dress as Sleeping Beauty.  😉

[MsAin1st]

😂😂 I’m going costume shopping today. Not sure I want to be a crayon (which is what I dressed up as for work) on a date. LOL. 

[Batya33]

13 minutes ago, MsAin1st said:

😂😂 I’m going costume shopping today. Not sure I want to be a crayon (which is what I dressed up as for work) on a date. LOL. 

I like that - maybe you two can do a couples costume?

[MsAin1st]

52 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I like that - maybe you two can do a couples costume?

Thanks for that idea! He thought it would be fun to do & wants to come pick out my costume with me. 🤗