Its finally over...............!

[fIIsion]

For those new to my story, I shall be brief.

 

Girlfriend of past 6 years broke up with me 6 weeks ago. She told me that she no longer loves me in that way, wants to break up and remain friends.

 

These past 6 weeks have been a living hell, the girl that I loved so much, gave all my attention...etc, dumped me.

 

She has not given an full explanation as to why her feelings changed, but has told me crap about not showing her that I loved her enough.

 

I remained friends for 6 weeks because she meant so much to me. She had been giving out some mixed signals since, which led me to believe that we may possibly get back together, but today she told me that to go live my life and getting back together may not happen.

 

This girl has been quite heartless since our break, she phoned me after one week, to ask if I could e-mail a cv for her as she has no computer, week 2, she came to my work place to ask help for an application form for a job. I have tried so hard to be just friends, but it is killing me, tonight I went round to her house and told her that I did not want to see her again or for there to be any contact. She just said o.k. and closed the door on me.

10 minutes later she sent me a text message, to ask for some of her things back, but not to give them to her but a mutual friend.

 

It feels like my feelings in this whole affair has been totally ignored, she decided to end the relationship, blames it on me, wants to remain friends but on her terms, now is only concerned about her belongings.

 

I'm in total shock of how cold she has become, its like she is a completely different person. Will she ever miss me? will she ever want to get back?, we she realise that i was the best thing in her life?...........WHO CARES I'm moving on.

[overtheedge]

Sounds a bit like my situation. She said that she was no longer in love with me but wanted to remain friends. Her reasons were pretty vague as well, although she mentioned like 5 of them. We were together for 4 1/2 years. She has been cold every time I've talked to her since and seems like a completely different person. Not seeing her definitely helps me a lot and it will make things better for you too. I would assume that the coldness is a defence mechanism for her because she is so used to the romantic relationship that it would be so easy to slip back into it if you both acted "normal". At least that's what I keep telling myself. I didn't do anything to make her hate me so why would she?

[chai714]

Fiision,

Sorry to hear about your situation. There is no easy way of breaking up, especially when you're the dumpee. Anyhow, the best thing for you to do right now is to take care of yourself, emotionally. You begin to help yourself by staying away from her - No Contact. Allow her to fully experience her decision, while at the same time you begin to heal up.

[UGH1607307217]

Hey FIIsion and overtheedge,

 

Both of your stories are like mine as well, I dont know why exs feel they have to act the way they do, Mine was really crappy to me even before I moved out of the house...(feel free to find my posts of you like) But ever since I have adhered to a strict NC with him, my life has been great! It took eight months of him wanting to stay friends and me fighting against it but it finally happened and for two months now, I am a new person.

 

Bottom line is...it will get better when you are ready to let it get better, dont try and figure out what they are thinking or what their actions mean, its too tiring and ya know what? I got sick and tired of being sick and tired from worrying about all of the whats and whys (I already knew the who ) So just hang in there, dont let her play with your mind, and heal yourself.

 

Have a great day!