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I feel like a girl I’ve been dating may be ghosting me, possibly because of a sex issue


Trevor
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Hello I’m new here! I could really use some advice. 
I’m a 24 year old male and have been dating a 24 year old female for the last month and a half. The dates are always fun and the chemistry is great, with her saying how much she likes hanging with me almost after every date. After almost every date, she asks me if I want to hang out at her place longer. However, I have PE and have not made her climax. I am also not very experienced in bed. I feel like she may be ghosting me because of this issue. 

The text above shows that she hasn’t responded to me asking her to come over yesterday. Also, normally she texts a lot more than I do. And after I texted her that, she blocked me from seeing her Instagram stories and I randomly saw from a friend’s account (he told me) that she went out to a bar with her friends. She was the one who made the plans to come over and swim because my parents are out of town this weekend, and also made plans to go to the circus in town on the same day, but cancelled saying she didn’t want to spend more money this weekend (on Friday we got food and went to a brewery, Saturday she was out w/ friends) but is still down to come swim and hangout. 

She’s never not responded, especially when I ask her to go and do something, so I’m kinda freaking out a little. I know we haven’t been dating very long and she is obliged to leave whenever she wants at this point, but I honestly really like her, just about everything was going really well and would hate to just give up on this, I am not sure what to do. Should I text her again in the coming days? Normally we text every day, and make plans to hangout through the week. Any advice helps please! 

Also some things to note: 
- I tore a ligament in my upper back a few months ago from work and honestly it makes sex a little difficult, she says she’s satisfied but I feel like maybe she isn’t. Also I have PE 
- I live at my parents at the moment, I can’t support myself alone rn because of my back injury. Currently on DI and will be getting a temp desk job in a week until I fully recover. Also I just recently graduated college. 
- she lives with a bunch of roommates that she doesn’t like. 
- She has social anxiety, as do a I. 
- she said she has anxiety meeting parents and that will take some time before she meets mine.

Edited by Trevor
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I dunno if its about PE(it might be), but what I do know from the messages is that, I am sorry to say, you sound very clingy which may be very off putting. If you ask her to hang out and she doesnt respond (from whatever reason), you just make other plans. Makes you less clingy and makes them see you are not just their "coat hangar" to be available at any time and that they need to respect your time. That is the rule for any girl, or even just friends. OK, you did make other plans, but you also shot 2 messages after she didnt respond to ask her again and after she responded and mentioned nothing about wanting to hang out with you, you asked again. That is the definition of "clingy", dont do that. She is not without sin, if she made another plans she could have just told you. Instead she chose to ignore you and even hide from you that she went out. That is not how somebody in relationship should act. She doesnt respect your time, straight up ignores you and hides from you. I think this relationship has run its course, at least from her side. And that she is already out.

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1 hour ago, Kwothe28 said:

I dunno if its about PE(it might be), but what I do know from the messages is that, I am sorry to say, you sound very clingy which may be very off putting. If you ask her to hang out and she doesnt respond (from whatever reason), you just make other plans. Makes you less clingy and makes them see you are not just their "coat hangar" to be available at any time and that they need to respect your time. That is the rule for any girl, or even just friends. OK, you did make other plans, but you also shot 2 messages after she didnt respond to ask her again and after she responded and mentioned nothing about wanting to hang out with you, you asked again. That is the definition of "clingy", dont do that. She is not without sin, if she made another plans she could have just told you. Instead she chose to ignore you and even hide from you that she went out. That is not how somebody in relationship should act. She doesnt respect your time, straight up ignores you and hides from you. I think this relationship has run its course, at least from her side. And that she is already out.

Hey thank you very much for your input. Yea, now that I look at it, it definitely looks clingy. With that being said, the first two texts in the picture were not sent because she wasn’t responding. We usually take about 2 hours to get back to each other due to the amount that we send in each text, with me usually taking longer as I don’t like to text all day long. I was just adding on to the last text, and I’m sure she took it that way. The last text I definitely should have left out. You think that this one situation could have completely ended the relationship? 

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You’re both only seeing each other and it sounds very casual and spontaneous. Plan dates ahead a day or two at least in advance. If she won’t confirm with you at least the night before, make other plans. 

You also seem anxious about sex. Slow it down and get to know the person before going over or having them over each time. 

I don’t know if you’re clingy but things seem hectic, not fun. I wouldn’t make a big deal about her not making it that day. She blocked you from seeing her social media and wouldn’t let you know in advance if she was coming over. She’s a waste of time frankly. 

I hope your back gets better. I’d focus more on getting back on your feet, recovery and the new job coming soon. Make a good impression as there may be permanent opportunities.

Edited by Rose Mosse
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Ghosting, as much as it hurts, is not about you. It's a passive-aggressive way of 'confronting' an uncomfortable situation. The 'ghoster' doesn't even care about you or your feelings; because if they did, they wouldn't behave like this towards you.

Do you really want to be with someone who's going to react like that every time a situation gets uncomfortable?

Now, she may or may not be going through something, therefore she hasn't replied yet. IDK. What I do know, someone who's very interested in you would have suggested an alternative, like "Hey, I couldn't make it today but how about doing something on the weekend." They certainly wouldn't have blocked you from their social media and if something like PE was bothering them, they'd talk about it.

Honestly, you deserve to be treated with respect, even if feelings aren't mutual.

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2 hours ago, Trevor said:

The last text I definitely should have left out. You think that this one situation could have completely ended the relationship? 

Woman here, and no. 

If we're into a guy, we're going to be happy he invited us over. My instinct is that she is indeed backing out, unfortunately. I say that because she offered no sort of follow-up to the plan she flaked on, hasn't responded to you last invitation and clearly dodged plans with you to go and hang out with her friends. 

And it might have absolutely zero with do with sexual issues. There could be any number of other reasons so I would try not to get hung up on that. I would not text her again, though.  She knows she's being flakey, and the last message from you was an invitation. It's up to her to respond. 

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