I've entered the anger stage of grief....how to deal with being angry!?

[takewhatuwant]

Mostly just a rant here.. I'm angry!

I met someone who had a new born baby. ( me 40m, him 39m )

I was hesitant to get involved with this person for this exact reason.

He assured me to just give it a chance. Neither one of us realized how much work it would be. I take responsibility for my decision to enter the relationship, with all the risks involved.

However, I broke it off because I was not getting my needs met from him.  It would be very understandable with a  newborn baby, that his time and attention were primarily given to the baby. I got the memo loud and clear...But 6 months in, it was as if my needs were not on the table anymore. I didn't need much..( basic romance, basic communication while we were away from each other, basic quality time and attention, a date night here and there. ) But it is as if once he knew he had me, he stopped making an effort.

So, after a few times of chatting about this, I decided to break it off.

However, now I find myself feeling angry for walking down this path with him. I feel like he did the old bait and switch. I feel duped!

I miss the baby!! (I don't miss him, I don't feel attached to him). I feel a longing for the connection I had with the baby.

So, my anger towards him, for walking me down this path. For reassuring me that this is what he wanted to share with me. That he was willing to go the distance to maintain a relationship together and make it a priority. 

I'm angry that he lied!

Now that its done, I have no access to this child I fell in love with..

It really just sucks. I am so angry that I let myself get attached.

That's all..

just venting I guess.

 

[Cherylyn]

Anger is very natural.

I transform my anger into gratitude.  I feel thankful and grateful to rid certain people from my life because due to personality and character differences, the relationship (or in other cases, friendship) wasn't meant to be.  Or, if that person wasn't good for making my life feel rewarding and joyous, again, I feel grateful for that person no longer causing my unnecessary stress and angst.

Change the way you think and your anger will decrease significantly.

 

[SooSad33]

Is normal to figure out with that amt of time IF  you are truly compatible with someone.

And it is okay that you are angry/upset/emotional etc.

In time you will feel better, once this all eases.. and it will.  You will see things clearer for why they didn't work and accept it.

Diff ways to try 'vent' out is journal - get it out a diff way.

Exercise.. work out.. go for walks, etc.

Get lost in your movies/ music... and just go through the emotions.  Things can take time.

You both had this experience and it didn't work... but in time, you may find someone who is much more compatible.