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Hi! I recently got into a relationship with a man whom is in the army. We met online and he wants me to come to where he is stationed currently. He is only my 2nd relationship, my first only had lasted a month as he wasn't the greatest person. I really do want to as it has been two weeks and we are officially a couple now. But I have some hesitation. You hear so many things about crazy things that happen and although I do trust him and believe he is a good hearted genuine guy I just worry that you can never be sure. How should I go about this situation?

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46 minutes ago, AnxietyInduced said:

We met online and he wants me to come to where he is stationed currently.

It's unwise to travel to some stranger you met online. Could be a scammer, prostitution ring, catfish, etc. Talk to a trusted adult about your online activity.

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Let's say you go. You're isolated in an unknown place or city. Have you been there before or know anyone else there? You have your passport and cash. And if you're robbed, do you have anyone to call? Have you traveled before? How well do you do thinking on your feet? You could be kidnapped and taken away for sex trafficking where you're sold, raped and kept in confinement for years. You could also meet someone who is attractive, ok, nothing suspicious but he is in the army and away for long periods. 

How then do you get to know this person and would it always be on you to travel out to see him in these foreign places? 

Weigh the risks properly and be a bit more selective in your prospective dates. There are a lot of risks involved and also barriers getting to know this person. It also begs the question of how desperate is he to get laid or have a partner if he's paying for your airfare. Think carefully.

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Not smart. If someone is not available to meet you locally and in public, then he's not relationship material, anyway.

Skip that, tell him he can contact you in the future if he's ever going to be in your area and wants to meet at (local place) to learn whether the two of you have any chemistry in person.

Then move your focus out of your own head and into the real world. Skip the stuff of creating fantasies about a stranger online, and start setting up quick meets with people who are actually available.

Fantasies will ruin your life, because no real person can live up to them, and that will make you miserable. They're also not safe. They put you into a state of trust where none has been EARNED and that's how lots of people disappear. For Ever.

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12 hours ago, AnxietyInduced said:

Hi! I recently got into a relationship with a man whom is in the army. We met online and he wants me to come to where he is stationed currently. . I really do want to as it has been two weeks and we are officially a couple now. But I have some hesitation. You hear so many things about crazy things that happen . How should I go about this situation?

^ Trust your gut instinct.  You really do not know him at all.  He's a stranger.  Two weeks is nothing.  It is not wise, nor safe to go to him (imo). If you were my daughter I would do everything in my power to keep you home.   If he wants to meet you then let him come to you - whenever he can.  Do not go to him.

May I ask, how old are you?

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Such a bad idea.  You dont know this guy.  He could be anyone, he is a total stranger.  People lie to get what they want and odds are he wants sex.

As others said, tell him to come to you in your area when he has time off.  Do NOT go to where he is for fear of what can go wrong.

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