I wish I was pretty

[sara.aa]

I wish I was pretty.

At school all my friends are drop dead gorgeous. Everyone has changed their look coming back prettier than ever, while I have looked the same for basically all my life. Sometimes my friends say that I'm pretty when I self-doubt myself. But I don't think it's true. Every morning I look into the mirror and see all the things wrong with my face. My face is too long, my nose has a huge bump on it, my eyes are to far apart, I have too much acne. I hate everything about it. My cousin is extremely pretty and I always wish I looked like her. My sister is so pretty and always gets compliments. I'm a person who always preaches self love and confidence when I actually have none. I'm always wearing a sweater even on the hottest summer days because I dislike the way my arms look. I want to pretty like the others. I wish I had enough confidence to post on instagram. I wish I didn't always delete every photo I took of myself.

 

[Capricorn3]

I understand it must be hard to have a low self-esteem, but always remember, not every pretty girl is "pretty" on the inside.  Not much substance, sincerity, integrity etc. 

In general, have you ever tried to have a mini make-over?  Get a haircut/style, play around with a little make-up, different style of clothes, join a gym, go hiking, do some volunteer work etc etc?  Sometimes all it takes is little changes to lift your self-esteem.

[Wiseman2]

Research "Body Dysmorphic Disorder". When obsessions with perceived imperfections get this out of control, it's time to see a doctor.

[Batya33]

4 hours ago, Capricorn3 said:

I understand it must be hard to have a low self-esteem, but always remember, not every pretty girl is "pretty" on the inside.  Not much substance, sincerity, integrity etc. 

In general, have you ever tried to have a mini make-over?  Get a haircut/style, play around with a little make-up, different style of clothes, join a gym, go hiking, do some volunteer work etc etc?  Sometimes all it takes is little changes to lift your self-esteem.

I agree.  Also up your plain water intake to 11 glasses a day and if possible cut out all sodas including diet sodas -I'm 55 and when I did this over the last 5-10 years it made my skin look a lot better/more glowy.  I think it's fine to cover your arms and even more fine not to be a copycat of your peers fashion-wise.  I had a near eating disorder as a teen and it really messed up my body for a couple of years so I'd take Capricorn's suggestions and also talk to someone if you continue to feel this badly.  All the best to you.

[SooSad33]

We are always our worst critic 😕 .

No one is perfect and with ALL they're doing & have done, I'm pretty sure they will still NOT be completely happy with themselves.

As for acne, that's normal part of 'hitting maturity' and that will pass ( been there 😉 ) . And I was much the same as you re: myself,, my looks.. my body - an insecurity.

Try not to be so hard on yourself.. and give yourself time.

The way YOU see yourself does not mean that's all that you are! ❤️ .

eg. I did cake decorating.. and I can always point out my little mistakes.  BUT, no one else saw it UNLESS I showed it to them. 😉 .

So, unless you point out what you do not like about your arms to others, they will not even notice!

Just give it time... time to accept & realize you're not that bad .

Maybe try to change something small.. like your hair.  Have you had a nice haircut at all in last cpl years? I didn't realize it, but, going thru my HS year books a few yrs ago, I realized, every year I had a diff colour, lol ( brown to black.. to blond (highllights).  Nowadays, back to med brown & longer.

We all go thru changes... but, yeah, no one is perfect 😉 .

[Mona Lisa]

On 6/16/2021 at 1:29 AM, suha.a said:

I wish I was pretty.

At school all my friends are drop dead gorgeous. Everyone has changed their look coming back prettier than ever, while I have looked the same for basically all my life. Sometimes my friends say that I'm pretty when I self-doubt myself. But I don't think it's true. Every morning I look into the mirror and see all the things wrong with my face. My face is too long, my nose has a huge bump on it, my eyes are to far apart, I have too much acne. I hate everything about it. My cousin is extremely pretty and I always wish I looked like her. My sister is so pretty and always gets compliments. I'm a person who always preaches self love and confidence when I actually have none. I'm always wearing a sweater even on the hottest summer days because I dislike the way my arms look. I want to pretty like the others. I wish I had enough confidence to post on instagram. I wish I didn't always delete every photo I took of myself.

 

You are young. Wanting to be liked and adored on social media is also an expected mindset of the young. This is something that you will learn over time as you continue to grow, and come into a full understanding of who you are. You're young so you're comparing, and figuring out your identity. At some point , if you mature in a healthy way, you'll realize that who you are is the best you could ever be. 

You could work with a counselor or a therapist. However, I feel like simply accepting oneself is the answer to all this. 

I remember that I didn't come into my full self worth until later in life. I was always unsure of things and looking back it's to be expected. 

In the mean time, explore, dress up, dress down, eat healthy, try different hair styles and explore the canvas of your own beauty. 

We don't all need to be conventionally beautiful. I know I'll never be, but I'm beautiful for myself and that's all that matters. And I'm sure it's the same with you. 

[BecxyRex]

Aw, I’m sorry you feel this way about yourself. It’s extremely likely that nobody sees your “flaws” the way you do. As you get older, you’ll see that lots of little things you worry about now are laughable later on. 

Be careful that you don’t consume social media too much. The perfect world you see there is rarely as perfect. If you have to use the platform try to follow things that actually make you feel positive about yourself and life. Most people spend endless time to get the right lighting and pose for their content. There are lots of body positive accounts to follow that don’t show filtered or overly perfected images. 
 

Aside from that, what actually matters is how well you do in school and how kind you are to others. Stay active, stay healthy and don’t sweat the small stuff. I’m sure you’re lovely! 

[Rose Mosse]

On 6/15/2021 at 10:29 PM, suha.a said:

I wish I was pretty.

At school all my friends are drop dead gorgeous. Everyone has changed their look coming back prettier than ever, while I have looked the same for basically all my life. Sometimes my friends say that I'm pretty when I self-doubt myself. But I don't think it's true. Every morning I look into the mirror and see all the things wrong with my face. My face is too long, my nose has a huge bump on it, my eyes are to far apart, I have too much acne. I hate everything about it. My cousin is extremely pretty and I always wish I looked like her. My sister is so pretty and always gets compliments. I'm a person who always preaches self love and confidence when I actually have none. I'm always wearing a sweater even on the hottest summer days because I dislike the way my arms look. I want to pretty like the others. I wish I had enough confidence to post on instagram. I wish I didn't always delete every photo I took of myself.

 

Beauty is skin deep so take it with a grain of salt. It's not going to last and the shape of your face will change as will the rest of your body as you age. The sorry but harsh truth of this. So guess what? The lovely mermaids and swans of your class will change too as time goes on. And in some cases some people do age really well and look nothing like what they did when they were younger. 

I was unhappy with the way I looked too when I was your age in school but things changed. As others have mentioned the way you view yourself changes with time too. Don't let others bring you down or compare yourself too much.

Social media isn't everything by the way. Take time to go out and be around other friends who have joined hobby groups or sports. Take your mind off of looking at yourself and thinking these negative thoughts. Your sense of accomplishment can come from things other than your looks. A slow change or change of mindset but much healthier way to think of yourself.

[Cherylyn]

Concentrate on your health such as eating healthier, have portion control and incorporate daily exercise into your lifestyle.  Take better care of yourself. 

Also, focus on your brain power and get ahead in life such as your education and career. 

I agree with others regarding memberships to various organizations, clubs, hobbies, sports, church if you're faith based and volunteer in your community.  There are so many people who need you. 

Be strong and hang tough.  Change the way you think. 

[Seraphim]

It is very hard to have good body image especially when young before you have a good solid sense of who you are. 
 

I know when I was young due to mental and sexual abuse I had a very bad sense of body image and in some sense still do in my 50’s. 
 

Just remember the top 1% of anything is not reflect of humanity. Find out what you have to give to the world and do that, that is of far more value .