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My girlfriend has been acting weird since we got back together


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So long story. So my girlfriend and I have known each other for 3 months and have been together for a little over month. We worked together, which is how we met. When we first stated dating things were great, but things quickly took a turn after only a couple of weeks. My girlfriend has had a lot of bad relationship history and is the jealous type. Which is the thing we fought about most at work. I eventually quit after realizing that if I wanted us to work I had to go somewhere. I thought is having time apart will do us some good. And things were good again however my girlfriend mood swings eventually got in the way. Things didn’t get better, she made me feel under appreciative and bad about myself. And she was bit manipulative. So I broke things off. She acted like she didn’t care at first, but later stated texting me. We texted for bit and asked if we can meet after the gym which i agreed to meet. She came over and nothing was solved, she shuts down emotionally. So I walked her out. After only a minute, my phone started blowing up with messages I don’t want her to text and dive so I called her and she was crying a lot and hysterical. I went over to her house and we talked. I told her I’m willing to give this another try, but I was done with jealousy and to make me feel appreciative every now and again. That was 2 days ago, but she has been acting weird she didn’t pick up her phone when I called her and her messages are very dry. My friend says she probably still recovering but my other friend says she’s trying to get me to chase her and trying to  manipulate me again.

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You said it yourself - she hasn't changed.

In fact, the only reason you agreed to give it another go is because she once again manipulated you with tears and hysterics and yes, she is now continuing more of the same games.

Know when to quit and learn how to block and delete toxic people, unless you enjoy the games. Understand that toxic people will not leave you alone and will keep coming back to suck more life out of you over and over for as long as you allow it. It's on you to put a hard full stop and block them permanently. Their behavior has nothing to do with caring about you, btw. Manipulating you is like them putting gas in their tank at your expense. They enjoy it, you get drained.

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She hasn't changed. She is definitely manipulative as said by Dancing Fool.

She sounds toxic, you did the right thing by breaking up with her at first.  

If I were you I would cut her off and never come back to her again. 

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You fought at work about your relationship? Were you flirting with other women at the workplace? What was she jealous about? Why on earth did you feel it was necessary to leave your work place for one person? Or were multiple people involved?

And what exactly is she recovering from? 

It sounds like this started off badly and it's still bad. You both aren't getting along but you're painting her in a bad light. If you can't tolerate her stop texting her and reaching out to her or responding to her. You don't owe her anything. Be clear you're not compatible and move on.

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She's recovering from the loss of the relationship; alternating between trying to move on and attempting to reconcile. She likely wants you back, but she is not sure of your feelings for her, so she is guarded at times. 

The relationship ran into problems very quickly. You did not like that she was often jealous, manipulative, and underappreciative of you. You left your job to find space away from her. You started feeling badly about yourself, so you broke up. Those facts indicate to me that you made the right decision. Now you are deciding whether you want to reconcile.

Given the facts above, reconciliation does not seem appropriate. If you still think it is a decision worth considering, then okay. Ask yourself this: have the problems you mentioned been resolved? If the problems have not been resolved, then they would likely again end any subsequent relationship you have with her.

Edited by Pleasedonot5
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1 hour ago, Danny said:

have been together for a little over month.  things quickly took a turn after only a couple of weeks.  my girlfriend mood swings eventually got in the way. That was 2 days ago, but she has been acting weird she didn’t pick up her phone when I called her and her messages are very dry. 

This is an inordinate amount of drama, fights, conflicts and on/off nonsense for dating 30 days, no?

End your suffering and cut the cord once and for all. End it politely, then permanently delete and block her from all your social media and messaging apps. 

This has "keyed my car" written all over it. Run👟👟

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2 hours ago, Rose Mosse said:

You fought at work about your relationship? Were you flirting with other women at the workplace? What was she jealous about? Why on earth did you feel it was necessary to leave your work place for one person? Or were multiple people involved?

And what exactly is she recovering from? 

It sounds like this started off badly and it's still bad. You both aren't getting along but you're painting her in a bad light. If you can't tolerate her stop texting her and reaching out to her or responding to her. You don't owe her anything. Be clear you're not compatible and move on.

I didn’t flirt with other girls, she says she would see me stare at other girls sometimes. She’s the jealous type, she gets mad when I even mention another girls name even if she’s just a friend. I left because I got tired of us fighting 

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11 minutes ago, Danny said:

I didn’t flirt with other girls, she says she would see me stare at other girls sometimes. She’s the jealous type, she gets mad when I even mention another girls name even if she’s just a friend. I left because I got tired of us fighting 

Is the sex fantastic or something? Is she supremely hot?

Why are you willing to put yourself into a jail of sorts for her?

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13 minutes ago, Danny said:

I didn’t flirt with other girls, she says she would see me stare at other girls sometimes. She’s the jealous type, she gets mad when I even mention another girls name even if she’s just a friend. I left because I got tired of us fighting 

Her reactions are over the top but it takes two to tango. Continuously calling an upset person jealous is also invalidating what they're seeing/interpreting/feeling. Both of you keep undermining each other - she's insecure and you disagree with her interpretation of events.

Be the bigger person here and just cut your losses. You're not getting along. 

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