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A bit of a long one


BobertBrown
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Hello everyone.

So this story could be a long one, but im going to try to sum it up.

I was just in an online relationship with this girl. It started because we played the same game and we were in the same faction. We complained about the same guy in the faction. As time went on we got closer and closer. I didnt think it would get like that. We would message each other about 2 minutes apart max. Always about nothing, just having fun. Eventually that 2 minutes turned to 5, then 15 then an hour. Which is fine, im not saying i need instant replies. 

Eventually I made the move to make us official. She said the L word first. The magic was still there and it was still super fun. We talked on the phone every day too. It started fizzling when we joined a new faction ( thats a whole other story, ill get into it if people want). We started chatting less and less. Again, not that alarming considering we all have stuff going on. 

Fast forward a few months and the ex gf (my childs mom) finds out. She ended up finding out the gfs email and found her FB and stuff. Which freaked out the GF and so after they exchanged a few emails, and both yelling at me. Eventually after a couple days the GF breaks up with me her last words on discord were "**** YOU!" and then im blocked. The ex says she found out the new GF was married.  Im not sure. Ive also made sure to change all my paasswords to

 

Fast forward another week (today) a mutual friend messages me saying (lets call her Girl)

Friend: "Girl is sorry for everything" 

Me: "Huh?"

Friend" Yes"

Me: "What do you mean?"

Friend: "She is saying that she is sorry for everything that happened"

Me: "Oh, to you?"

Friend: "No to you mr"

Then I told him she blocked me and he told me he tried getting her to unblock me. 

Friend:" She isnt unblocking you, but shes sorry"

That confused me

so I replied "Tell her I dont wanna hear it then, Makes no sense, shes obviously not sorry if im still blocked" and i told him to tell her i said that. Then he showed a screenshot of her reply 

Girl :" Hes not blocked. He has alot of heart"

 

So i re added her and I told her I just want to be her friend again. Im not asking for more than that, just friends. Shes been mad at me the whole time and I kind of get it. Shes also being super specific about things I have to do if i wanna be friends

No messages after 4 (we both finish work then)

Close my side of the convo too

Only good morning after she says it

She keeps saying we shouldnt be talking so i asked her "Well if thats how you feel then say the word and ill go away forever" ive done that a few times and each time she changes the subject

"TTYL"

"I need to get some work done"

"We can start new tomorrow"

but she always responds

 

Now my question is, Should i continue to try to stay friends?

Are these demands like a test to see if ill listen?

Is it all even worth it?

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Try to round out your life a bit more away from the screen and get involved in real-life, real people, in-person groups, friends, interests and dating.

 Have you read 1984? Going down the cyber-relationship black hole  is like a dystopian warp of newspeak and doublethink.

Read it, it may give you insight into the artificial and inbred world of cyber-fantasies and relationships. 

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She doesn't want to talk to you and you appear needy. Don't contact her anymore, respect her space. If you still want to play the game with the same people including her, keep it civil and lighthearted. This is no way to treat your game-mates. Leave the L word out of it as it was likely said in jest or in the moment (not meaningfully). 

The question of whether she's married or not still hangs. Your ex went crazy - why? She's your ex or is she? Both of you are leaving a trail of destruction or more questions that are left unanswered. The whole thing sounds shady. 

Have fun with the game but keep things superficial and light. Forget the thing you both had. Hope this blows over.

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59 minutes ago, BobertBrown said:

No messages after 4 (we both finish work then)

Close my side of the convo too

Only good morning after she says it

Wow, just wow. 

Does demands really seem like something friend does? If she is a friend(or even SO) you should be able to call or text whenever and whatever you want. That is not something that is limited. If they cant answer, they can call back or text later when they can. Point is, people that you call friends or SO dont do that. So she seem to not be either hence you have no obligations toward her at all. She wants your attention. So I would suggest to not give her that satisfaction and move on. 

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30 minutes ago, Rose Mosse said:

Don't contact her anymore, respect her space.  Leave the L word out of it as it was likely said in jest or in the moment (not meaningfully). 

 

This is here I offered many times to stop contacting her if thats what she wanted. I said "Just say the word and ill leave" but then she says something like a question to get a response. And the L word was said meaningfully she made sure to tell me

 

4 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

She wants your attention. So I would suggest to not give her that satisfaction and move on

Thats what i was confused about. She says she doesnt fully trust me yet. Not sure if we can go back to friends. I miss that friendship. I was just curious if this seems like a trust game or just too much

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2 hours ago, BobertBrown said:

Now my question is, Should i continue to try to stay friends?

Are these demands like a test to see if ill listen?

Is it all even worth it?

"Stay friends", no   "Worth it", no.

You're better off stepping away from this circus.  Cyber relationships are not real...JMO.  I'm assuming you've never met in person?

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2 minutes ago, HeartGoesOn said:

"Stay friends", no   "Worth it", no.

You're better off stepping away from this circus.  Cyber relationships are not real...JMO.  I'm assuming you've never met in person?

^ I second this. Cut your losses, you'll be better off.

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