My gf and I just broke up and I really want to message her wanting to get back together

[soggybread93]

My gf and I broke up just a few days ago after nearly a 2 year relationship. We ended on really good terms and agreed to stay good friends and perhaps even get back together if it feels right in the future. For context on why we broke up, we pretty much both felt that we had lost our spark and kind of felt like we had become more like best friends than a couple so we figured we each needed some time alone. However, the past couple days for me have been terrible, I can't stop thinking about messaging her or getting her back and I barely have any motivation to do the things I love despite the fact that we ended on such good terms. I really do feel that if we got back together and really talked about what we want from each other we can absolutely make it work because this girl is extremely important to me. So, I'm really just asking for advice on what the right thing to do is. I know I will be able to get over her with due time but my life just feels so empty without her right now so should I message her telling her how I feel or just try to push through the pain? I also understand that my want to tell her how I feel may be due to the fact that I am just desperate for happiness and reassurance right now but nonetheless I still do really love her and want to be with her. Any advice is truly helpful. Thanks

[Rose Mosse]

Post here. Talk to the forum. Do not contact her. The break up happened a few days ago so give yourself more time to work through the emotions and sort out your thoughts. 

"Lost the spark" is a cop out excuse. You should know exactly why it didn't work based on disagreements between the both of you in the past. If you don't want to share those reasons, that's fine but keep in mind that the forum can't help you without the details of the break up or agree/disagree with the idea of reconciliation. 

Keeping in touch with each other while you heal is unrealistic and prevents any actual healing. You'll both be stuck in eternal limbo and unable to move forward or nurture new relationships. Those types of proposals to stay in touch or remain friendly or "take things slow" shouldn't be acceptable to you if what you're looking for is a relationship where two individuals are just as invested and interested in the other person. Don't hang around waiting for someone to come back to you. You have the rest of your life to live and make the most of. You only get one. 

[Wiseman2]

54 minutes ago, soggybread93 said:

My gf and I broke up just a few days ago .we pretty much both felt that we had lost our spark and kind of felt like we had become more like best friends than a couple.

Sorry this happened. How old is she? Give her some space and time to reflect and miss you. It seems you two were in a rut.

Why not wait until she reaches out?

 Is it possible either of you had an eye on someone esle?

[SooSad33]

2 hours ago, soggybread93 said:

We ended on really good terms and agreed to stay good friends and perhaps even get back together if it feels right in the future. For context on why we broke up, we pretty much both felt that we had lost our spark and kind of felt like we had become more like best friends than a couple so we figured we each needed some time alone. However, the past couple days for me have been terrible, I can't stop thinking about messaging her or getting her back and I barely have any motivation to do the things I love despite the fact that we ended on such good terms.

Is good you two did end on good terms, but don't reach out.

If the spark is gone and this all ended, then leave it be.

It is a change for BOTH of you.  To work on accepting.

Often, to work on getting over someone is best to NOT be 'friends', as you cannot move on properly.  You need time to heal & accept.

So, break the strings and distance yourself so you can do this.

Has been only a few days, so is very fresh.  Keep moving ahead.

Keep yourself busy... take care of YOU now. - Get out for some air, keep active, hang with friends, etc.