She broke up with me, and I miss her. Please Help

[dennyfehera]

We started e-dating in late February, she lives in Brazil, I live in the USA. Coincidentally she lives in the same Brazilian city my family and I used to live (prior to coming back to the USA), I have double citizenship (American and Brazilian), so our communication was fine because I know how to speak her language. The possibility of us meeting in real life is totally possible since most of my friends and family lives in that city of Brazil. She is friends with one of my friends that I made back then when I was living in Brazil, so I know for fact that she exists. 

We met on Facebook with the mutual friends thing, and we were internet friends for about a year. I was into her, she was into me, but it took us 1 year to open our hearts completely to one another, so that's when we started e-dating. She was the first to give signs of liking me back. 
As time past by as a couple, we'd text each other everyday, dream about each other, sext, discuss our future, watch movies on discord. It was the first time I ever had a relationship, although it was internet dating, I was so hyped up about her and our relationship, because it was something I never had before. Though she had other (toxic) relationships before, and it wasn't all that great according to her (We're both 20 years old). I bought some teddy bears that resembled us and I ordered a custom frame of a  drawing I made of me and her having a picnic in a sunny afternoon (it's a very cute piece of art), I still have it hanged on my wall. I bought all that, just for the grand day of our encounter. She loved all the presents and the idea.

Weeks later she was going on a field trip with her family for 2 weeks, and where she was travelling had little to no internet connection, so we had only a few minutes of our day to chat, when she was lucky to have internet connection. 
After that field trip and she got back home, things weren't as I much expected. I thought that me and her would talk to each other like it was. But it seems like her anemia attacked and she wasn't eating very well and slept all day. Not only anemia, but anxiety and depression got to her real good. I tried everyday to talk to her and ask if she's okay, and be a very supportive boyfriend. I would see her online status for only a few seconds after I sent those messages, then she'd be offline and respond to me 4 hours later saying "sorry for taking too long, I slept, and no, I'm not doing very well", the reason being her anemia, anxiety and depression.
Days past by, and now I was texting her 2 in 2 days, it was really tiring and stressful for me, because I felt that if I didn't text her at all, she'd probably take a week to text me. Our relationship was getting cold.

We had our first discussion 3 weeks ago, about my trust issues. As I was the only one in the relationship that openly admitted our relationship to friends and families, and she was the one in the relationship who didn't say a thing about us to her friends and family. Her reason being to prefer to tell everyone about our relationship on the day of our encounter. I was "okay" with her decision, but it pretty much bugged me to see some of her real life male friends catcalling her on the comment section of her photos, she told me that they're joking, but I still don't know how to feel about this.

Two days ago she sent me a message. I got surprised, it was always me who would text her first. But her message wasn't all that great, she was breaking up with me. I honestly wasn't surprised because I overthinked the possibility of it happening on the first day of our relationship. She explained the reason of our breakup, she isn't well, she's not been eating or sleeping correctly, and she acknowledges it isn't right for me to be the only one to text her, and she feels awful for that. She says she's gonna try to better herself and treat me the way I deserve. She also said she pretty much plans to come back with me but doesn't want to give me certainty in case someone nice appears in my life, and I don't hold her back. 

I was very respectful and supportive of her decision of breaking up, but deep inside, my heart really aches the breakup. I love her so much despite everything. I want to text her I miss her, but I also want to give her the space. I'm afraid we'll never talk again.

[MissCanuck]

I'm sorry for your pain, OP. It's rough when you're hurt and disappointed. 

But I have to say first and foremost that e-dating is not a real relationship. I don't mean to be dismissive of your feelings, but it's crticial not to get carried away with things when you've never met in real life. There is a reason why she didn't want to tell everyone she was e-dating, and that's because it wasn't a relationship for her the same way it was for you. She may have been excited about the prospect of someday meeting you, but it's clear that she didn't really intend to invest in something so nebulous in the meantime. 

In the future, don't commit yourself to someone you have never met. You have no idea how well you would gel in person, and it's just not realistic to expect someone to give you their heart when you've never so much as been on a date. Especially given the very long distance between you, the odds were stacked against you in almost every way here. 

You will be okay again. Stay off her social media for a long time. You will be hurt if you continue to watch her live her life as you struggle with the pain. But date locally from now on. It's fine to meet girls online, but cyber relationships are not substitute for the real deal and often end exactly like this. You sound like a sweet guy with a lot to offer; save it for a girl you can meet regularly in real life. 

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, dennyfehera said:

. I bought some teddy bears that resembled us . I want to text her I miss her, but I also want to give her the space. I'm afraid we'll never talk again.

Sorry this happened. LDRs are very difficult to sustain.

Break-ups hurt. Take care.