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My brother-in-law is stealing my meds


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I believe my brother-in-law has been stealing my medication. Long story short, he is 2 years older than me (36), dropped out of high school, and has never held a job. Unfortunately me, my wife, and kids live with him in their mother's old house (My wife doesn't want to move). I suspect him of stealing my prescription medications over the years. There were multiple times where he broke in my safes (I had 3 different ones) and either took handfuls of pills or even full bottles at times. This last time was the last straw. I had 3 months supply of Zoloft (for my anxiety issues), I just finished my first months worth and was going for my next bottle and couldn't find either of the 2 remaining bottles. I believe he took my *** again! I am so frustrated and upset it's been bothering me for days. I feel like calling his ass out and/or calling the cops on him. I don't know what to do. I don't have any evidence. My wife has asked him if he took them, and he said no (obviously). This happened last time too when I was missing Ambien pills. I'm going crazy here.  

 

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Can you keep the meds elsewhere, not in the house, where you can access them easily as you need them but he doesn't know where they are?  Maybe keep them at work?  Put a day's worth in a container and keep it in your pocket?

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Well, I'm pretty sure you are sure.  So, you need to confront him as this has been going on for way too long.

A person is not allowed to take other ppl's scripts. Simple. Plus this is a form of theft.  it is yours, not his.

If he needs some, he has to go see a Dr for his own meds, he knows this, so tell him enough and to go do that.

Because if it;s not him, who else would it be? ( did this happen before you moved with him? Likely not).

I suggest you have a good talk with him.. not lose it on him, just have a stern confrontation on this. - So that he does not feel cornered and overwhelmed.

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5 hours ago, jpham009 said:

This happened last time too when I was missing Ambien pills.

Lock them where he has no access, such as in your car.

Ambien has a significant amnesic component and is a controlled substance with a street value.

It's your responsibility to make sure they are locked up and safe.

If they are missing, make out a police report.

 

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5 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Lock them where he has no access, such as in your car.

Ambien has a significant amnesic component and is a controlled substance with a street value.

It's your responsibility to make sure they are locked up and safe.

If they are missing, make out a police report.

 

Medication has to stay in a controlled environment or it will go bad.  

OP, I suggest you move out.  

What does you wife say about this?

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14 hours ago, jpham009 said:

I believe my brother-in-law has been stealing my medication. Long story short, he is 2 years older than me (36), dropped out of high school, and has never held a job. Unfortunately me, my wife, and kids live with him in their mother's old house (My wife doesn't want to move). I suspect him of stealing my prescription medications over the years. There were multiple times where he broke in my safes (I had 3 different ones) and either took handfuls of pills or even full bottles at times. This last time was the last straw. I had 3 months supply of Zoloft (for my anxiety issues), I just finished my first months worth and was going for my next bottle and couldn't find either of the 2 remaining bottles. I believe he took my *** again! I am so frustrated and upset it's been bothering me for days. I feel like calling his ass out and/or calling the cops on him. I don't know what to do. I don't have any evidence. My wife has asked him if he took them, and he said no (obviously). This happened last time too when I was missing Ambien pills. I'm going crazy here.  

 

If he's breaking into your safe, there is no way he's going to admit to any wrongdoing. Catching someone out in a lie or outright theft is cornering that person and he has addictions issues or embroiled in some other black market selling of those drugs if he's selling them on the street for ie.

Both of you are better off leaving this house but my first concern would be him breaking and entering anyway to steal or being let into the home on visits when you're not home or he's not supervised and stealing those drugs anyway. 

Keep them safe in an unknown area and report the theft to the police. Your wife doesn't know what to do so she's not going to know how to handle this either. It's not likely she's going to want to get involved especially with someone who's an addict or is unpredictable and committing illegal acts. Talk to the authorities or police on what to do if this keeps happening and follow their advice if you need to keep reporting the thefts. This is so frustrating and I'm sorry to hear this.

 

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This is what you can do.....have him arrested. What he is doing is illegal. Set up a camera, video it for evidence.

Maybe this will enforce the idea that he needs to get help.

If he overdoses and dies, you could be held liable in a civil suit because you knew for 3 years he has been stealing drugs from you and you never reported it to the authorities. ,

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Either the guy is really talented to break into 3 safes, or your safes or your passwords are lousy.

There's no way that I'd start a fight with anyone in my own household, but it's also not likely that I'd allow myself to be pressured into living in a household with people I could not trust.

So I'd make this less about the guy (he's a symptom, not the problem) and more about my relationship with my wife.

Either she's willing to move with you, or she's not. If not, why not? 

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On 5/7/2021 at 1:15 PM, jpham009 said:

I suspect him of stealing my prescription medications over the years. There were multiple times where he broke in my safes (I had 3 different ones) and either took handfuls of pills or even full bottles at times. 

I feel like calling his ass out and/or calling the cops on him.

This intrigues me. What kind of safes are these?  Clearly they are not "real" safes in which things can be kept securely.  Were they all simply locked with a key which he used to open them?  I mean, three safes?  How's that even possible? 😕

That said, yes, you are responsible for keeping your medication in a safe place and clearly that is not happening. What he's doing is plain and simple theft, which means you should report it to the authorities.  If you need proof, then set up cameras.  Either that, or you move out and find a place of your own.  This needs to be sorted out between you and your wife.  You both confront him about it, or you both start making plans in finding a place of your own.

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I agree with others.  Find another hiding place and make sure you hide your new safe as well.  Or, don't get a new safe and hide your meds in a different, secret location.  I agree with others, if you can hide them at work and you have to commute to work daily, this is a good idea.  Make sure you have extra somewhere at the home front in another hiding place.  For your current safe and pill bottles, replace them with tiny candies such as Skittles. 

I agree with others, don't live together anymore.  Find another place and move if your BIL (brother-in-law) doesn't move out. 

 

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Posted (edited)

The safes are easy to break into. Probably those home safes that have the fire proof casing. I break into them for my job. You can drop them on the ground and they bust open.

Edited by smackie9
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