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How to seduce her? (she is my landlord)

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Hi everyone,

It's been a month and a half since I moved into an apartment with the idea of staying there on the short term (a few months). I’m 32 years old and I live in this 2-bedroom apartment with my landlord, who has her separate bedroom. Over time I realize that I am more and more attracted to her. She is 7 years older than me but on my side that is not important because I find in her other attractive qualities. Until now she has been gradually open to me (she introduced me to her group of friends, as well as her sister, who have been to the apartment before). We've been doing some activities together so far (picnicking in the park, etc.) and recently I suggested that we go for a run, to exercise a bit, which was super cool! In the evening we have dinners together, and we have also done some shopping (for gardening and home repairs) together twice already. The ideas of the picnic and the shopping are hers. For dinner she often offers to share with me, but I am the one who proposed the jogging. From time to time we also watch movies in the living room and recently we have had quite a few aperitifs together. We both love beer and I even managed to get her to drink some of my cocktails, although by nature she doesn’t like cocktails. As I like her and she is gradually opening to me (through the activities we do together), I’m thinking that now is the time for me to go into action ...

However, I am afraid of her reaction if ever she is not interested in me. When I get close to her it doesn't bother her; when I physically touch her (jokingly) on the arm or shoulder she doesn't say anything. But hey, I don't know if that's enough for a clue.

Another detail:

She mentioned a girl whom one of her male friends is attracted to and said she could introduce her to this girl; but I didn't say anything. At that time, we were talking about her male friend who fell in love with this girl. But hey I think her friend is dating this girl, and then I'm not interested in this girl anyway.

Another time she said that her big sister is a good and kind woman and knows how to treat men well. She continued by saying "Do you realize that? I am giving you plans there…”. While ignoring that it is her who interests me ... But she was a little drunk when she spoke about her sister and there were other people present at that time.

She doesn't have a boyfriend right now; she split with her ex and said they broke up on good terms and she speaks with him but rarely.

My questions:

What to do to seduce her more? How to proceed? How do I know if she is interested in me?

Thanks in advance!

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1 hour ago, smackie9 said:

Invite her over for dinner.

They live in the same apartment.

6 hours ago, ChrysChrys said:

I live in this 2-bedroom apartment with my landlord, who has her separate bedroom.

OP, do you want a date or do you want sex? You said "seduce" which implies you want sex.

Edited by boltnrun
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I find that word, seduce a little much - from your thinking, I feel you are maybe mid 20's?  Kinda new to all of this.. lol. ( But I see you've reached your 30's).

I don't see any need for you to 'try and seduce' her.

You two seem to be getting along fine. 

You are saying you plan to stay there short term.. then what?

You've really gotten into her within 1.5 months.. so she has grown on you... why not continue to let it bloom as it is.

You two have done a few decent things together.. but, as of yet, she has not shown a real interest in you.. other than 'friend-wise'.

As someone mentioned above- maybe during a meal, ask her if she'd ever date a tenant- That'll break the ice, for sure.

Give her some time to think on it ... but no expectations, in case she does not see you that way.

And should things end up that way, do expect your time around her to be a bit awkward, if she isn't seeing you that way...

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Well as the old saying goes... don't poop where you eat. 

I think your use of seduce is creepy. There is the art of seduction.  but like many artful things, subtlety is the key. 

Unless you do intend to have sex with her and then leave town.  in that case, upfront is the way to go.

But from what you wrote, sounds like she is not thinking of you as a paramour. Maybe she will if you ask her if she has ever gotten involved with a tenant.

it is close quarters... so I think back to my original comment.... maybe wait till you're ready to move out. 

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Firstly, be prepared to find another place if she's not interested.

That alone should be a huge thing to consider. Because if she doesn't feel the same way back, she will feel very awkward with you there.

But if you're determined to attempt this, do something special for her, as above mentioned, flowers and make her dinner.

During or after your dinner, let her know that you're interested in her and see what she has to say.

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I think she's friendly, nothing else. Passing you off or trying to introduce you to a friend or sister is a passive way of saying you're hot but not really my cup of tea. Enjoy the great convos and fun times you're having. They seem like warm and kind people. 

If anything happens, I'm sure it'll come about more naturally rather than you having to wreck your brain thinking of how to seduce her. See how things unfold. Don't force anything.



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I read your other threads.  Looks like you are early 30's and get a little caught up in the intricacies of women and their interest level in you.

Since you are dependent on her as your landlord don't you think this isn't worth the risk?  If she rejects you and things become uncomfortable you will need to find a new place to live and in a hurry.

  If you really like her and haven't allowed yourself to fall into some fantasy because of the situation then wait until you move out and then ask her on a proper date.  Then if she says yes Great! but if she says "Lets just stay friends" it will only be disappointment you feel...


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Women like men with resources. You need her resource, the apartment. 

What resources can you offer her? You are not in a position of strength here, I think. 

You can try to pursue, put don’t spend a lot of effort in what Is inherently an uphill trek. This is a very steep hill. 

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Thanks for your answers so far. To clarify certains points which were not clear and for which some of you asked questions, by "seducing her" i mean "making her like me too if it's not the case yet".

Since i like her; i would like it to be reciprocal.

I don't just see her as a sex partner; she has the potential for more than that.

Honnestly she is very open as a woman, so i kinda imagine her just dating for the short term too!

The last time we had people at home she was taking pics with her shirt-up and bra visible ..

She also told some stories about her tinder plans back a couple of years ago. Sex-wise she seems open to various types of conversations; she mentioned that it wouldn't bother her to run a brothel ! Hahaha


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Eh. Not funny/bad taste. Brothels seethe with human/sex trafficking and kidnapping/extortion. If you both have a good rapport just enjoy the company and have fun. 

I wouldn't look into this too deeply or get too invested if it's short term. 

Edited by Rose Mosse
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Also she like lifting her shirt often ... maybe to show off her piercing.


I am staying with her, the time to find a job (and maybe longer, who knows?) since i have just graduated and had to come in this town to look for a job. So at the moment i have less resource than her indeed. But i have just graduated from a top school and she seems impressed with that; that's why she like seeking for my help for advices in her career. She also has credibility in me from an intellectual perspective i think. She always ask me advise with regards to her job.

I really don't know how to play this card; the more time passes the more i like her. It's tricky. I will continue the activities with her at normal/natural pace for now. Hopefully she gets interested too.

The funny thing is that when i arrived i was thinking of having a pure landlord/tenant relationship, similar to when i work (i never mix the professional and personal life), but the fact that we been doing quite several stuffs together has really broken that initial state of mind of mine.

I really like her also because of the way she views the world, her points of view w.r.t. different things in the society. We share similar points of views on a lot of stuffs. 

I also heard her saying to a friend of hers that she like a man who has a tough character/attitude. She was talking about the boyfriend of her friend who is kind of weak as man (by weak i mean he doesn't show authority).

She also has a cat, which i go along with perfectly; i take care of him all the time, even when she is at work; she likes me taking care of the cat.

Any other possible advice out there please?

Do not hesitate to shoot proposal for game plans/scenarios.

I am still 50/50 at the moment with regards to my decision (change gear or not), but as time will make me like her more for sure (i cannot fight against this) , there will most likely be a time i will be tempted to shift gear up (i rather want to do it in a structured/tactical way).

Thanks in advance!

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It's good that the both of you get along. Are you expecting her to fall in love with you? 

If you're looking for a relationship, I think you'll have to find a job and move out. Sex and flirting is one thing. Expecting someone to reciprocate feelings for you based on the existing relationship and your current circumstances might not be realistic. 

Are you not happy just enjoying each others' company?

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I don't necessarily expect her to fall in love with me. And i'm not specifically looking for a relationship at this point in time. However i happen to be attracted to her a lot ...

I didn't know this was gonna be the case. In fact all the time i have been looking for a relationship i never found one hahaa ... you get my point, right?

These things are the type of things that happen by surprise.

Just enjoying each others' company, hummm .. i don't know. I would say that this is out of my control.

I had never imagined i would be in this situation but trust me time is power and it can make a lot of things happen. I could well be there and try to just enjoy the company and all of a sudden be crazy in love with her ... I would say it's out of my control. And frankly speaking, if i change my attitude by deciding to force myself to put limits and just enjoy the company, she will most likely notice this and figure out that something strange is going on. She could even interpret it in a completely different/wrong way.

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Oh sorry!

Well if she turns me down it depends how she does it. If it's in a blunt/aggressive way i will be hurt but i am a big enough boy to respect her decision going forward and i will be able to still live with her.

The question is more how would she feel about it?

regarding the date thgouh, since we are doing many things together already (diners, drinks, picnic, shopping, etc.) do i really need to setup a specific date? Or should i just talk to her and see how she react?

But i think making an official date is more respectful towards her and it shows a better image.

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