He rejected me

[quipu]

1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

Yes, that's an easy assumption for many to make -and in this context he is not that into you and is trying to come up with an easy enough excuse you'll buy. 

Fortunately, it's been proven time and again that someone doesn't have to have objectively attractive physical features (meaning as compared to whatever trendy/societal standard is in force) to have chemistry -mutual chemistry-with someone else and that someone else might be objectively attractive or not.  Certainly many people seem to "match" in levels of attractiveness but there are so many exceptions I know for sure there is more going on.  For example, height as compared to being short is an objectively attractive feature of straight men.  For me, I preferred shorter men, and married one.  

I'd get off this kick of how much looks matter, and please please never think you're doing someone a favor or it makes you superior in some way just because you happen to be attracted to someone who is not objectively attractive, including to your mother.  

I don't feel that way at all. I already could tell he wasn't interested, he just confirmed it with his words. I told him it's fine we can just be cool. Him not bn interested in me for whatever reason doesn't make me any difference. 

[quipu]

I prob should have added this before but he told me about women turning him down BEFORE I revealed to him my interest verbally. That's the only reason why I said anything bcuz I was just letting him know that there actually is a woman who likes him and that woman is me. And then that's when he said he had basically stopped trying to date which translated to me "I don't like you back" All is well though we are still bn cool with each other. 

[catfeeder]

My heart goes out to you. I hate the idea of anyone internalizing rejection.

Rejection speaks of another's limits rather than of any deficiency in you.

Most people are NOT our match. Hold out for the RIGHT person who will view you through the right lens in order to see and appreciate your unique value.

Whenever someone doesn't own the capacity to do this, it's a knee-jerk reaction to consider this as a reflection on you--but it's not! It only tells you that he is not your person.

YOUR person will 'get you,' and you'll enjoy a simpatico together that will make you wonder why you ever shed a tear over anyone who offered you less than this.

Head high, hang in there, and write more if it helps.

[quipu]

On 4/9/2021 at 9:32 AM, boltnrun said:

Did you think you'd have a better chance with him because he's allegedly unattractive to most women? Do you think because he's unattractive he should want to date you?

Absolutely not. His looks don't have anything to do with anything to me. He either likes me or he doesn't. 

[Wiseman2]

27 minutes ago, quipu said:

 He either likes me or he doesn't. 

Or.... He's being honest and just not into dating or relationships at the moment.