No idea which forum - he has thick saliva

[stacey89]

I have no idea which topic to put this under and it's just tricky.

I have dated someone in the past and when I kissed him (it was dark so I couldn't see) he had thick saliva and it was just awful. I could taste it and I didn't kiss him again so it went nowhere.

I met him again, years later and we got extremely well. We stayed out all day and it was great. However, again he had thick saliva that is white in the corner of his mouth when he talks between his teeth.

It grossed me out. 

He has started talking to me again and I would love to see him, but this is just in the back of my mind and I don't know how to bring it up without being extremely rude or blunt. Shall I just not even bother? I know a couple of people that do this and they are in relationships. I have no idea how the topic is brought up.

[Wiseman2]

22 minutes ago, stacey89 said:

However, again he had thick saliva that is white in the corner of his mouth when he talks between his teeth. It grossed me out. 

How is his breath? How is his dental health? Unfortunately he may have gum or other oral disease (which could be contagious). 

If it's a deal breaker/red flag you'll have to pass if you can't get past it. 

[DancingFool]

There is no point in telling him anything because he can't fix it.

What you are experiencing is lack of chemistry/sexual attraction on a deep genetic level. You feel grossed out because your very essence is screaming nope nope nope not this guy heck noooo, not compatible.

You can't force this or make yourself change or get him to change. It's not possible.

Of course you know other people with his kind of "issues" who are in relationships - that's because they are with compatible partners. When they kiss....it's fireworks rather than eeeewwww.

You were right to let him go the first time and you should leave this be this time around as well. Never ever try to force sexual/physical attraction. It's a no go.

[reinventmyself]

Not sure one can change the consistency of ones saliva.  Can't imagine how to approach asking someone to change something they have no control over.

Probably not a good way to start a relationship.  Your friends who made mention were probably in a relationship for quite some time before they asked for change. 

 To go as far as to be grossed out by this is a sign to not continue.

[stacey89]

Thanks everyone. I think that it's probably best if I don't see him again then. I'll have to figure out a reason. (He lives in another city anyway, but messages me every now and then). 

 

It's a shame, because we do get on, and there was chemistry last time we met up, but I can't get past the saliva thing. 

[Rose Mosse]

Dehydration. That was my first thought. Anyway, if he's in a different city and this is long distance, pass. Date local men or someone whom you can see regularly and get to know. 

[catfeeder]

Speaking only for myself, there's no way that I'd want to see someone if I was physically repulsed by him. It makes no sense to me.

You can just tell him that you don't see a distance thing working out for you.