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My boyfriend thinks I look like his sister and has a hard time getting turned on when we’re together.


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So my boyfriend and I have been together a copy of months. In the beginning everything was fine good chemistry , good sex but in February I had a surgery and couldn’t have sex for like 4 weeks. After that he kept putting me off and I thought he must be sleeping with someone else. So yesterday we sat down and had a long talk and he told me the reason he’s been weitd is because I look like his sister and when he thinks of that he has a hard time getting it up. We’re trying to work things out but he tells me the spark just isn’t there don’t know why,.. he thinks it’s the sister thing..he even suggested therapy. I don’t know what to do. I feel insulted, almost and I’m like ready to break up with him.

I feel like I’m wasting my time. I’m good looking and I feel offended to hear I don’t turn him on..should I stick out and just do therapy together?

 

 

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The only reason I haven’t broken up with him is because I know he’s s good man. But at this stage we shouldn’t be having these issues 😪 I’m loss for words 

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 It is funny that he did not have this issue initially, I think it is a bunch of nonsense.  No one should get counseling 2  months in.   Move on.

Edited by Hollyj
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6 hours ago, Pcuevas said:

 February I had a surgery and couldn’t have sex for like 4 weeks. After that he kept putting me off and I thought he must be sleeping with someone else. 

Just curious why you are posting under 2 usernames?

End it. You're dating 8 weeks and half the time you were laid up.

The sister excuse is nonsense. He checked out because at a few weeks dating there's no real investment.

If you personally want therapy, go for it.  Dating a few weeks and most of it conflicted, is a good reason to cut your losses.

Edited by Wiseman2
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8 hours ago, Hollyj said:

 It is funny that he did not have this issue initially, I think it is a bunch of nonsense.  No one should get counseling 2  months in.   Move on.

This^^^ I say the sister thing is nonsense too. I agree, after two months, it ain't worth it. I also agree he checked out and lost interest after your surgery.

Edited by smackie9
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Your feelings are valid and spot on. 

Dump him. There is no solution to this problem he created. 

And the freaking nerve to blame you for something that obviously can't be changed.  

He knew what you looked like when you met.

This guy is a weirdo and a total waste of your time. 

NEXT!

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I think he doesn't know how to tell you that he has lost interest or is not attracted for some other reason, so he's making things up. Otherwise, this would've been an issue from the beginning. You didn't just suddenly start to look like his sister. 

No couple should even be thinking about therapy only a couple of months in. 

It's time to just break up. 

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15 minutes ago, MissCanuck said:

I think he doesn't know how to tell you that he has lost interest or is not attracted for some other reason, so he's making things up. Otherwise, this would've been an issue from the beginning. You didn't just suddenly start to look like his sister. 

No couple should even be thinking about therapy only a couple of months in. 

It's time to just break up. 

Totally agree.  He would have noticed you looked like his sister when you first met him, not 2 months in.  I think it's a bunch of BS.  Move on.  

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I think deep down inside I know it’s time to go. I’m just having s hard time doing because he keeps telling me he wants to work on us, which is weird because if you’re really not there then why even bother? I guess I gotta have the balls im this situation.

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It's two months, it isn't like you have a long-term investment.  If you continue, I can guarantee that you be back here shortly regarding a break up.

Edited by Hollyj
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12 minutes ago, Tris22 said:

I’m just having s hard time doing because he keeps telling me he wants to work on us, which is weird because if you’re really not there then why even bother? 

You two have hardly even eastablished a foundation yet, if you've only been dating a couple months. 

When you need to "work on" the relationship at this phase, there's really no hope. 

 

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23 minutes ago, Tris22 said:

I think deep down inside I know it’s time to go. I’m just having s hard time doing because he keeps telling me he wants to work on us, which is weird because if you’re really not there then why even bother? I guess I gotta have the balls im this situation.

I think in some bizarro world way.... this guy is a total coward.  He not only can't break up with you, but he's making it hard for you to break up with him.  If he really wanted to work on things, he WOULD HAVE NEVER TOLD YOU THIS.

It's like when the guy you date has bad breath.  You don't want to hurt his feelings, make him feel bad, make him think you are rejecting him in some way.

So you carry mints.  You start influencing him to brush more or whatever.  

But in your case, this guy is like creating the problem, it can't change and then making all this drama, like let's get therapy after 8 weeks of dating.

If you don't end it, in two years when you are sexually frustrated and your man can't get it up, you are going to think about to this and be like, why was I so dug with this guy.

And you know, I just realized something... maybe he erectile dysfunction and making excuses.....  But even that is messed up.  I am sure you are a lovely woman and many men will find you attractive.  Don't let him blame you for his obvious short comings-- physical or mental.

You can do better

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No, don't change your hair color!  Only do something like that if you want to, not to try to keep this guy.

I think the "you look like my sister so I can't have sex with you" is an excuse.  

What exactly is there to "work on"?

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