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so my ex boyfriend which whom we i was trying to get back together a few weeks back, but because i was being stubborn and taking baby steps and being a little unconsiderate at the moment he decided i was being toxic and not giving him peace, so  he told me to give him some space and not call him back till he got over how i treated him. 

 

Now he has a new girlfriend and i texted him asked him is he was happy and he told me  "i am in peace which is the most important to him" my respose was the next: i am not going to lie to you it hurts a lot and i dont know when its gonna stop hurting since i was the one that pushed him away, but if that is what he wants i am going to try my best to be happy for him. He than just thanked me and said " same for you"

 

Was it wrong of me to text him when he knew i already knew he had a new girlfriend? like did i pushed him further away showing how hurt i was?

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33 minutes ago, limichelle said:

It depends on your intentions. Did you text hoping to win him back? If so you’re not being honest with yourself that you were just seeing how he is. I think at this point you have to move on as he has. 

Unconscously i wanted to let him know i care and that hes on mi mind, since is so soon im still a little selfish wanting him for myself only but ultimatley if he is happy then i know once it dosemt hurt anymore i will be happy as well. im just hurr that i took him for granted and pushed him to someone else that pf course is treating him as he deserves and should be treated.

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You were just double checking to see if he still cared and if there was any hope.  Now you know so you can learn from this and make sure you don't make the same mistake the next time.

 Lose his number, learn from your mistakes and grow as a person.  Soon enough you will be ready to date again and when you meet someone new he will benefit from all of your new found relationship maturity.

Lost

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1 hour ago, Lexi99 said:

Now he has a new girlfriend and i texted him asked him is he was happy and he told me  "i am in peace which is the most important to him" 

Talk to a trusted adult about this. Your obsession with him since age 15 is not good for your health.

 

Edited by Wiseman2
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3 hours ago, Lexi99 said:

Was it wrong of me to text him when he knew i already knew he had a new girlfriend? 

Yes, it was wrong. 

You need to stop, take a deep breath, and let go of this guy. He has moved on. You don't need to worry about pushing someone away when they're already gone. 

Delete and block his number. 

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9 hours ago, Lexi99 said:

Unconscously i wanted to let him know i care and that hes on mi mind, since is so soon im still a little selfish wanting him for myself only but ultimatley if he is happy then i know once it dosemt hurt anymore i will be happy as well. im just hurr that i took him for granted and pushed him to someone else that pf course is treating him as he deserves and should be treated.

It's probably better to work out those feelings on your own, talking in therapy with a professional or moving on with your life and your hobbies. It's not his problem that you're hurt (you are no longer together) so dumping that type of negative emotion on someone is quite toxic and unhealthy for you and others around you.

At the same time, I don't think you should keep it in. Be open with yourself about what you're feeling whether it's acknowledging it mentally or writing it down or talking it out but don't dump it on the ex or someone inappropriate who is not part of your life anymore. 

What your text reads is that you're struggling and you are looking for help. You can learn to help yourself. Or, find better resources (professionals) to help you work through that pain. Find ways to cope and process those feelings like guilt, sadness and pain. Step by step and one day at a time.

 

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You reached out.. again. Now stop!

You said your piece.. you know he is not into you. That is done.

You said a few things as did he (saying same for you).

Now let it be.. before you do something you regret.

You can NOT work on recovery if you do not stop this... only way to work on healing & moving on is to not contact him.

Respect him , as you'd wish him the same for you.. leave him alone.

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You didn't want him when he wanted you (you just wanted him around for "support" and attention). Now that you can't have him because he's with someone else you suddenly "love" him.

It looks like you only want him because you can't have him. I would guess it looks that way to him too.

Take this as a life lesson. And don't contact him anymore. Respect his relationship. 

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