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She left with our kid. The kid was only 2 months old. We started after like 2 weeks to hang out. Sleepovers,dinners,presents,breakfasts and so on. She did not want sex with me but we did all other things…

This we did for 1,5 years!! I got hopes. She even gave me a key to her flat(?). We had and have every week with the kid. On my week i usually surprised my ex with the kid,my ex was happy about that. She invited me to stay over and i did. She had planned wine and stuff and we saw a movie togheter before bed. She wanted me to stay over.


Time passed and we did this a lot but she refused sex. Det Said “its not gonna be so good for our kid if we had sex”(!!??). I helped her a lot with stuff in her flat. I helped her with her car. I showed her What i wanted with her,kisses,cuddling in bed,hugs and so on. She never protested,but did not want sex.


As usuall i wanted to surprise her at my week with the kid so we went to her place. The kid and i went in her flat. She was ******* another dude!!

We talked in the kitchen. She said it was only sex. She also Said that she did not want me to meet another women(!?). She said she was single and ****** What she wanted to ****. What did she do with me for 1,5 years????


I stoped talking to her and blocked her everywhere. A couple of weeks went and she contacted social securites because she wanted to have a relationship with me because if our kid. 2 weeks later she had another guy but now she wanted a serious relationship with this new guy. She told me both her fwb and the new guy had met our kid(?!)

Why did she showed ME feelings and gave me presents and time? 

Just playing me?


Im confused. Now in december her new guy and her went “official” on facebook and i guess our child meets the new guy a lot. She still want us to talk with social services about our kid and our relationship with our kid.

Wich parent introduce a kid to a fwb? Wich parent introduce a kid to a “serious” boyfriend after just 2 or 3 weeks?? How does the new guy treat our kid? How much does she introduce him to our kid? Is he having our kid when she works? Does our kid like him?

Before me her longest relationship was only 5 months. We Where togheter for almost 4 years. The kid is soon 2 years old. 

Tips and advice please...

Edited by Bolond76
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  • Bolond76 changed the title to Ex girlfriend and one kid
51 minutes ago, Bolond76 said:

My ex was reported by social services for very poor boundyries with the kid AND she was reported by preeschool due to not having our kid there so much on her weeks with the kid. 

Who reported her? Are your kids in foster care? Does she have family they can stay with?

Who has primary custody? Do you have visitation? Do you pay child support?

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Social services reported her and a investigation began. Its closed now because they did not find anything suspicious. We have every week with our child and we have shared custody. No child support. 

She left me one time before the "real breakup" but came to me after 2-3 weeks telling me she was pregnant. Im not 100% Sure the kid is mine. Dnt know What to do about that. Ive signed a paper it was mine when he was born but due to my ex behavior with multiple guys,fwb and "serious" relationships after the breakup tells me that she is not trustwhorty. 

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2 minutes ago, Bolond76 said:

Im not 100% Sure the kid is mine. . Ive signed a paper it was mine when he was born 

 Using this child as a tool and weapon in your break-up is awful.

Now it's not yours? Why? Then why have visitation? If you don't start paying child support they'll garish your wages and suspend your license.

Social services does not report cases to itself. You know this.

Take care of your kids, leave her alone and if you don't think it's your child, get a paternity test. Not that it matters since you're not supporting it anyway.

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