6figurechick Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 So I met a guy a as mutual friend. Always very nice, nothing more than that. Fast forward 2 years later he inboxes me on IG. We talk a couple weeks and then go on a first date to the movies. Everything went perfectly well for about 6 months. There's an unforseen issue in his living space, (mold/***ty landlord) so I agreed to let him stay with me for a couple weeks until he found something else. Goes very well, about a month into him staying he calls one night from work and says I really like coming home to you, it it ok if I stay and pay half of the bills. In love and in the honeymoon stage I agreed. We are in our 30s and are sure of what we want. Fast forward a couple months. I ask to meet his mother we're almost at a year. He's already met mine seeing our living situation. Answer is No, I say why he says they are no longer speaking. We are very social people he won't post me on any platforms but allows me to post him. I'm very attractive and so is he. Says he doesn't like people in his business 🙄 He has a gathering with all his younger family members once a year at a beautiful estate, I'm not invited. He cooks cleans, does laundry, and lots of outdoor housework. Is what still seems to be a good man, but mysterious. He is very stern and straight forward and can sometimes come off as mean. When What the hell is going on? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 19 minutes ago, 6figurechick said: Everything went perfectly well for about 6 months. so I agreed to let him stay with me for a couple weeks until he found something else. Is this the same man?: Link to comment
Andrina Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 After almost a year together, you should feel more secure that you're really special to him and not regularly insecure that he's not welcoming you into the other parts of his life. And who needs someone who seems regularly mean? Yeah, it's best not to make major decisions like moving in together until at least a year of being together. As you can see, it'll be harder to break up when you have to deal with him moving out. But from what you've written, if it were me, I'd end things. There's a reason you're not happy, and those reasons are valid. Link to comment
SooSad33 Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 If Wiseman is correct- YOU have a lot more things to worry about, other than this guy being 'mysterious'. YOU are in a real mess, I think you know this! WHAT about this relationship is GOOD? Get out of it. And get yourself back together & in a better spot. Link to comment
Rose Mosse Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 He has to move out. Why not tell him to leave? It sounds like he can cook, clean and do lawnwork. He'll survive. The odd story about his living conditions before sounds strange. Are you sure that story checks out or did he leave his roommate because the both of them didn't get along and he was abusive and rude to his roommate too? If he's with you he's leeching off of you and your kids. You don't need someone like this. I'm referring now to your first thread about him treating you and the kids badly. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 You are a secret and he is abusive. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 " It got so heated that I asked him to step away from the home (to cool off) he didn't, so I did. When I got back in a couple hours most of his things were packed and he was gone. I called and he said he was never coming back. Next day he says "That was your home, I need my own home", and once I get one and you and the kids can prove you're ready you all can come live with me. 😩 Idk how to take that. He says he wants to continue our relationship while he lives with his bachelor best friend who has a different chick around every time I see him. He also says if I choose not to give him sex during these times he will have to get it elsewhere. Is this a thing, should I move on?" Where is the "good man" part? You left this out of your thread. We all told you to be done with him. Lady, you need to start to think about your kids. Your kids will always remember who you brought into the home and how you allowed them to be treated. Stop choosing men over your children. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 Same thing as in your previous thread. He is still an abusive control freak. He cooks, cleans and does yardwork? Seriously? That's like every guy ever. How low are your standards if this is what you are clinging on to as being a good man. He is barely basic issue model, bare minimum. It's like saying this car is really amazing because it has 4 tires, an engine, and it runs. As for hiding your existence....honestly there is only one reason for that - cheating. He isn't mysterious, he is really being quite blatant about that. The question is what's going on with you that you do not understand this. Even if he isn't actively cheating on you right now, he is perfectly set up for it. He even rubbed that straight into your face - if you won't provide sex, I'll get it elsewhere. After that....I cannot believe you are still talking to him. He is not mysterious at all, he is a creep. You say that you are attractive, you have a job, your own house, etc - whyyyy are you fishing this bottom of barrel trash and think it's a golden nugget? Serious question for you. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 He terrorizes you and your kids. What are you teaching your kids about how relationships work? Would you want one of your kids involved with an abusive control freak? Please think less about your own desire to have a man around and more about what is best for your kids. Link to comment
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