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Often look back to tough life chapter


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I went through an unhappy chapter of life in 2012-2015 (early 30s). I was living in an unfamiliar town, and had little luck forging personal or romantic relationships. To boot, I was in a job that made me miserable. I was happiest when I had the opportunities to leave town, which was as frequently as possible. That period taught me a lot about what I didn't want out of life and really forced me to grow and come out a more mature or stronger person. It prompted me to grapple with my sexuality (I'm gay) and begin the process of coming out.

In 2015 I moved to a new city, which is where I live now. I've fallen in love with life here, met the love of my life in 2018, got engaged, and am getting married in the fall. I'm moving up in my job here, and really feel completely at home in this city. While I'm far from my beloved hometown and most of my family, I never feel homesick. I'm in a very happy spot in life. 

All that said, in quiet moments to myself, I may stumble upon updates from that old town I lived in- maybe on social media- maybe while thumbing through old photos on my phone. And sometimes I LOVE looking back at that time, remembering what it was like, and mostly being happy that that time ended and I came out on the other side of it. 

I just find it strange that I am sometimes drawn to thinking about that time of my life. Does anyone else ever experience this? Nostalgia doesn't quite fit but I was wondering if a word for this sentiment exists. 

Thanks all. 

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It happens sometimes more often the older you get and it's normal reminiscing. It sounds like you're reflecting and content with your life the way it is now. Congrats on the engagement and work success. 😊

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1 hour ago, jnr586 said:

And sometimes I LOVE looking back at that time, remembering what it was like, and mostly being happy that that time ended and I came out on the other side of it. 

I can relate to that.

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Congrats on your climb beyond such a challenging period into such a wonderful present and future.

I think it's natural to reflect on hard times. Whenever I do this, it inspires pride in my resilience, and it builds appreciation and gratitude for the contrast in what I have now.

If same holds true for you, it could be why you do it a lot, especially if you might even enjoy it to a degree.

You suffered, you had no idea how things could or would get better, but you mustered your way through it, and it stretched you--you grew from it.

It could be helpful to take an inventory of how this period may have benefitted you, even in some small way. If you have trouble coming up with something, your default benefit could be a recognition that hard times CAN be temporary. This might bring you some confidence in navigating your future.

EnjOy!

 

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