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Caught partner on dating website


Hannah81

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Just now, Hannah81 said:

Thank you so much...

I just feel really lonely and torn it’s horrible 

 

 

I understand! My ex cheated & I had to move with 2 small children & literally no support from family or friends. 

You need to realise being alone is better than being with him.

Join meetup groups, take up a new hobby, get a pet...anything to take your mind off him & your situation.

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Just now, shellyf62 said:

I understand! My ex cheated & I had to move with 2 small children & literally no support from family or friends. 

You need to realise being alone is better than being with him.

Join meetup groups, take up a new hobby, get a pet...anything to take your mind off him & your situation.

It’s so horrible isn’t it I’m sorry you went through that 

Thank you I will do that 

 

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Just now, Hannah81 said:

It’s so horrible isn’t it I’m sorry you went through that 

Thank you I will do that 

 

Thank you. It was 25 yrs ago. Life is great now....it was hard at the time, but it all worked out, and your life will too.

Keep posting here & we will be your support system!

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2 minutes ago, Hannah81 said:

My friends are just listening to me and being there for me and checking up but they probably just believe I will go back again 

Well, you can't blame them.   Show them, and yourself that you will change your life.

Honestly, you really need to address why you have stayed with this guy.  When you understand, it will help you move on from this miserable situation.  

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1 minute ago, Hollyj said:

Well, you can't blame them.   Show them, and yourself that you will change your life.

Honestly, you really need to address why you have stayed with this guy.

Because he’s emotionally abused me for so long I got used to it and thought this is what I deserve but this time something has clicked and I can’t do it anymore but my problem is I always go back and I just can’t this time I know I can’t 

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1 minute ago, Hannah81 said:

Because he’s emotionally abused me for so long I got used to it and thought this is what I deserve but this time something has clicked and I can’t do it anymore but my problem is I always go back and I just can’t this time I know I can’t 

You need to stop telling yourself this & rephrase it as "I used to go back"......this is a new you, and you wont be going back

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Just now, Hannah81 said:

Because he’s emotionally abused me for so long I got used to it and thought this is what I deserve but this time something has clicked and I can’t do it anymore but my problem is I always go back and I just can’t this time I know I can’t 

You made a positive move by blocking.  Do not allow him in if he comes over, if he insists, tell him you will call the police.    I also suggest staying with friends for a few days. 

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4 hours ago, Hannah81 said:

continued to flirt and message other women throughout our relationship and stupid me has always forgiven him. He makes it seem like it’s my fault for looking.

 

4 hours ago, Hannah81 said:

I don’t know why I have put up with it. I even left my family to move in with him but he became more and more abusive towards me and I moved out and still stayed with him. 

Combined... him being on dating sites AND abuse.  Are reasons to get out of this.

You find that inner strength that says you do NOT deserve this kind of treatment!  He is mean.  He does not deserve you!

You walk away & stay away.  No contact.. nothing.

Is only way you can start to heal & let go.  You've allowed this crap for way too long.

Time to work on getting over all of this and Get yourself back.. to Good ❤️ .

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9 hours ago, Hannah81 said:

I clearly do have very low self esteem and don’t know how to get it back 

Yeah I'm being mistreated by my wife (seperated). Its horrible isn't it, you feel you have to accept it just to get them back. But oddly, if you move in the other direction he will be more interested. So, don't speak with him, and get strong, stronger than you ever have been, and show that *** that you are worthy.

He might be on it as he wants attention, as he can't get it from you

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10 hours ago, Hannah81 said:

Yes but still owes me money he said he’s paying it back next month 

Consider writing off the remainder that is owed as lost, and paying it back yourself, rather than leaving the door of communication with him open just so that he can pay.

If he mails you a check, great. But if he wants to talk about it, don't let him.

When you feel strong enough, you can sue him if you want. 

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