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Caught partner on dating website


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At the end of my tether.... my partner has continued to flirt and message other women throughout our relationship and stupid me has always forgiven him. He makes it seem like it’s my fault for looking. He says he likes the attention but would never act on it. I have now been informed by a friend that she has seen him on a dating website. I just need to get away from him but I’m finding it so hard....

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I live in another county away from my family I live alone now and have a good job here, I am now in debt because of him so cannot move again. I have blocked him this evening.    thank you I do

If you truly want to get rid of him, then block all contact. Right now. Just do it. I don't care how hard that feels, how final it feels - treat it like kicking a drug habit. You have to quit this col

You will get it back by getting away from him.  What do you get out of this relationship?  Move in with your family and reach out to friends.   You are making an active choice to stay in this, do

What exactly does he have to do for you to end it?   What do you get out of a cheating liar?  

You do realize that he has been cheating all along.  He does not love or respect you.  

Get tested.

 

 

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I know I don’t know why I have put up with it. I even left my family to move in with him but he became more and more abusive towards me and I moved out and still stayed with him. I don’t know why I’m not strong enough 😞 

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Just now, LootieTootie said:

Do you have a low self-esteem?

Usually people who allow their partners to continually mistreat them and humiliate them in public are people who feel they aren't worthy of respect and love.

I clearly do have very low self esteem and don’t know how to get it back 

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6 minutes ago, Hollyj said:

What exactly does he have to do for you to end it?   What do you get out of a cheating liar?  

You do realize that he has been cheating all along.  He does not love or respect you.  

Get tested.

 

 

know I don’t know why I have put up with it. I even left my family to move in with him but he became more and more abusive towards me and I moved out and still stayed with him. I don’t know why I’m not strong enough 😞 

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You will get it back by getting away from him.  What do you get out of this relationship? 

Move in with your family and reach out to friends.   You are making an active choice to stay in this, don't you think it is time to get yourself back.

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I get nothing except an odd occasion when I’m happy. I have been emotionally abused fir 7 years and have no strength left. Luckily I moved into my own home in July 2020 as it got so bad in the lockdown. He just won’t leave me alone. I hate how I sound as I’m usually such a strong women 

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5 minutes ago, Hannah81 said:

he became more and more abusive towards me and I moved out.  I don’t know why I’m not strong enough

You are strong enough if you had the wisdom and resolve to move out. Continue to confide in trusted friends and family about the abuse, betrayals etc. Stop having sex and get tested for STDs, you may only know the tip of the iceberg.

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2 minutes ago, Hannah81 said:

I get nothing except an odd occasion when I’m happy. I have been emotionally abused fir 7 years and have no strength left. Luckily I moved into my own home in July 2020 as it got so bad in the lockdown. He just won’t leave me alone. I hate how I sound as I’m usually such a strong women 

You tell him it's over.  Then you block and delete him.  If needed, get a restraining order.   You are not helpless, you can do this.  

Where does he live?

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I live in another county away from my family I live alone now and have a good job here, I am now in debt because of him so cannot move again. I have blocked him this evening. 
 

thank you I do deserve a better life I know I do but he’s just got into my head I would never find any better 

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1 minute ago, Hollyj said:

You tell him it's over.  Then you block and delete him.  If needed, get a restraining order.   You are not helpless, you can do this.  

Where does he live?

I have told him and he’s said he’s not giving up on me. He lives literally 2 miles away from me. 

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3 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

You are strong enough if you had the wisdom and resolve to move out. Continue to confide in trusted friends and family about the abuse, betrayals etc. Stop having sex and get tested for STDs, you may only know the tip of the iceberg.

I was strong to move out I was so proud of myself but then let myself down by still being with him. I have confided in friends but I’m not getting great advice from them 

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1 minute ago, Hannah81 said:

I live in another county away from my family I live alone now and have a good job here, I am now in debt because of him so cannot move again. I have blocked him this evening. 
 

thank you I do deserve a better life I know I do but he’s just got into my head I would never find any better 

Do not let him drag you down to his level. You are a strong woman & can have the best life ever, you just need to get away from his negativity.

Do not start communicating with him again.

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Just now, Hannah81 said:

I have told him and he’s said he’s not giving up on me. He lives literally 2 miles away from me. 

Then you tell him you will call the police and get a restraining order.  Stop giving him so much power.  He does not love you, but loves treating you as his emotional punching bag.  Your life, take some control!

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Just now, Hannah81 said:

I was strong to move out I was so proud of myself but then let myself down by still being with him. I have confided in friends but I’m not getting great advice from them 

What are your friends saying?

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Just now, shellyf62 said:

Do not let him drag you down to his level. You are a strong woman & can have the best life ever, you just need to get away from his negativity.

Do not start communicating with him again.

Thank you so much...

I just feel really lonely and torn it’s horrible 

 

 

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Just now, Hollyj said:

Then you tell him you will call the police and get a restraining order.  Stop giving him so much power.  He does not love you, but loves treating you as his emotional punching bag.  Your life, take some control!

I will have to now as I feel different this time about breaking up I’ve tried so many times but failed 

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