Jump to content

Long distance relationship


Recommended Posts

I've been with my boyfriend for about a year in a long distance relationship,he's a dj/radio announcer, also a businessman and he have 2 kids .I need some advice. We've been back and forth ever since the covid 19 pandemic occurred.  It's been really tough ever since and I felt though my boyfriend is being really distant. He said he's frausted and worse of all cannot get to see me . Even more worse he cheated and he honestly came out and tell me .. I even forgive him and was willing to take him back by him earning my trust back,it was really difficult ever since .We came to an agreement that we will put in the effort and try to make it work  but I've notice a slight change .He's not calling as much nor video calling either,which just left us to texting only. When I called he never answers and he kept saying that he have alot on his mind.what should I do because I'm thinking that he's in another relationship. I feel that he's lost interest.  

Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, Tricia said:

what should I do because I'm thinking that he's in another relationship. I feel that he's lost interest.  

I think that you should go with your gut, here. He's already cheated on you, and now he's behaving like a cheater again. There are better men out there. Free yourself up for one of them!!

Link to post
Share on other sites

This probably boils down to just how much you know about him. Lack of enough info (not uncommon for LDR) puts blinders on. This means we don't get to see what's actually going on or form first hand knowledge or opinions about whether things are good or bad. Long range evaluations are never as trustworthy. That's just a fact of life. There are exceptions but you'll take risks doing so. 

Do you know who cares for his kids when he's working? Have you met them? What's the situation with the mother of his children? These are past history/track record clues about what type of person he is. How much do you know about his family life or previous marriage or relationship?

He was honest with you but it may not be the kind of direction you want it to go. Honesty is good, right? But this sounds more like he's looking for a way out and doesn't know how to break up with you. A lot of people won't be honest about infidelity if they don't feel invested in their current relationship because all sorts of things could go wrong. You could sabotage his family life, his career, his new relationship. That he told you about the infidelity tells me that he cares even less for you and doesn't see you as a threat. That he's making less effort to communicate with you tells me also he's not as invested as you thought he might be. 

What's your end goal for this relationship? Did you see yourself in a serious relationship with him or him asking you to move in with him, be a stepmum, become a family? What are you losing here? Is it worth hurting yourself even more over or was this something you weren't serious about either? 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Tricia said:

Even more worse he cheated and he honestly came out and tell me.When I called he never answers and he kept saying that he have alot on his mind.

Have you met in person? Yes, end things. He's most likely in a local relationship. You as well should date local single men.

Link to post
Share on other sites

What kind of epiphany has happened to make his sucky ethics do a 180? If you think people change from being a cheater to not being a cheater in a heartbeat, you're very naive.

Your self worth is severely lacking. Work on that before you date again, and then date locally. You will find out far sooner who the person really is, and with a healthy self esteem, won't accept smelly garbage that needs to be dragged to the sidewalk.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Someone cheats and they should be jumping through flaming hoops to make it up to you and earn your trust back.

Instead he's too busy to take your phone call?

This was over when he cheated.  He's now merely behaving badly hoping you'll have some self esteem and leave.

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/21/2021 at 9:35 AM, Tricia said:

he cheated and he honestly came out and tell me

The only reason, IMO, to confess cheating is to manipulate you to break up.

I'd oblige and find myself a better partner.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...