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Is moving slow a good thing or is he not interested?


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So I met this guy about two weeks ago on bumble. We have GREAT conversation and went on one date so far. I had a lot of fun. He's very nice, we have a lot in common and he's texted me consistently since. We're supposed to have another date this coming weekend. 

My only issue is (and I think it's definitely a me issue) is that he's hard to flirt with. We definitely joke around in ways that could be flirty I guess? But definitely not anything crazy. But I mean I think he likes me?I just have a very hard time assuming he's interested in me on more than a friendship level even though we met on a dating app?

 

Is that normal and healthy or am I just so conditioned with guys trying to get physical right away that this seems weird?

 

(I'm definitely not opposed to it going slow and I think he's great by the way) my insecurities are just kicking in

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He’s not going slow. You met once.  I’d slow down on the chatting and spend time getting to know him in person.  Chat with your buddies. Let him learn about you over time and mostly in person like unwrapping layers of a special package. 

Edited by Batya33
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Gosh golly gee you can't determine anything after just one date nor over text. If he is interested he will ask you for another date. Just keep showing your interest, be upbeat, light, a little flirty.

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36 minutes ago, Spicydicey449 said:

So I met this guy about two weeks ago on bumble. We have GREAT conversation and went on one date so far. I had a lot of fun. He's very nice, we have a lot in common and he's texted me consistently since. We're supposed to have another date this coming weekend. 

 he's hard to flirt with.

Relax, it's fine The main issue is that he asked you out again. And that's good news. Don't worry about flirting.

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You have only been on one date.

 By him not being sexual, it shows that he respects you.  By someone trying to get into your pants does not indicate interest, but wanting to get sex.  Personally, I would be really turned off by guys trying to be physical early on, as I would want them to get to know me first.  

How old are you?

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That sounds like a really positive start. And it’s great that he’s already asked you out on another date. 
Having said that, I can personally understand why it might seem frustrating as most guys show intense interest at the start, but that’s not always a good indicator in itself. 
How is the communication been since the date? Is he showing an interest/initiative. Also, consider his background. Where’s he from? I’ve dated people from different nationalities and have often noticed differences in dating etiquette. So what might be slow to you might be normal to him. 
Keep us posted with the details. I love a bit of suspense and romance! 🥰

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On 2/8/2021 at 2:40 PM, Spicydicey449 said:

am I just so conditioned with guys trying to get physical right away that this seems weird?

Just in case you weren't aware of this, you don't have to get physical right away just because a guy wants to. You know you've got a choice, right?

 

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Two weeks and one date, I'd be concerned if a guy was being overly suggestive to me.  At this point I don't even know him.

Yes, I think you've been exposed to too many men trying to push physical boundaries with you too soon.   Come back and talk to us if he's still not giving any physical flirty vibes after a couple more dates.

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21 hours ago, Hollyj said:

You have only been on one date.

 By him not being sexual, it shows that he respects you.  By someone trying to get into your pants does not indicate interest, but wanting to get sex.  Personally, I would be really turned off by guys trying to be physical early on, as I would want them to get to know me first.  

How old are you?

I'm 25 and he's 26

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5 hours ago, LunarUK said:

That sounds like a really positive start. And it’s great that he’s already asked you out on another date. 
Having said that, I can personally understand why it might seem frustrating as most guys show intense interest at the start, but that’s not always a good indicator in itself. 
How is the communication been since the date? Is he showing an interest/initiative. Also, consider his background. Where’s he from? I’ve dated people from different nationalities and have often noticed differences in dating etiquette. So what might be slow to you might be normal to him. 
Keep us posted with the details. I love a bit of suspense and romance! 🥰

The communication has been good! We text daily, give each other updates on our day. I do enjoy him. My difficulty is whether or not I'll be more interesting than just a friend 😂 but I think I'm over thinking it a bit. I'll give an update if anything exciting happens.: )

 

And he's from the same city I'm from. He's from a Mexican family and I'm white. We're 25 and 26.

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4 hours ago, gamon said:

Just in case you weren't aware of this, you don't have to get physical right away just because a guy wants to. You know you've got a choice, right?

 

I do know that. I just think I seek that validation so I allow it. It is an issue 

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8 hours ago, Spicydicey449 said:

 He's from a Mexican family and I'm white. We're 25 and 26.

Are you self conscious about your looks/attractiveness?

Why else would you be in a rush to get sexual right away?

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15 hours ago, Spicydicey449 said:

I do know that. I just think I seek that validation so I allow it. It is an issue 

Something to work on.   I am thinking that you have made a lot of poor choices?

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