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Feeling not enough


Iredeindigo

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My bf has been looking at images of other women all throughout our relationship. I’ve brought it up multiple times only to be told I’m jealous and insecure. Sometimes he has said he will try to stop. He says our sex life sucks and I don’t seem attractive to him, but he gets angry at me almost every time we try and holds things against me. I’m not trying to do the same. I think it’s both our faults. I just feel like I don’t know how to let it go, him looking at other women is making me less and less attracted to him. I don’t feel like putting effort in because even if I do he still does it. This is really troubling me and I feel like I’m losing my mind and becoming hyper observant of his internet profiles. Does anyone have any advice on how to address this better? 

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27 minutes ago, Iredeindigo said:

 Does anyone have any advice on how to address this better? 

Yes.  Instead of trying to save this, show him you have enough self-respect to walk away.  He's rude and disrespectful to you and treats you like dirt.  A real jerk (imo).  Your big mistake is allowing him to treat you this way.  Please note, he will never change.  In fact, the longer you put up with his lousy treatment, the more he'll do it.  It will get worse.  Is this really what you want for the rest of your life?

YOU have the power to change the situation by standing up for yourself and leaving a toxic situation.  If you decide to stay with him, knowing he won't change, knowing he will forever treat you like dirt, ... well, that's on you.   Choice is yours.

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Why let him treat you like that? because you love him? You can't change him, and how he treats you. The only way is to leave him to make it stop. Girl there are plenty of nice caring guys out there that don't have a need to drool over images of women, and insult you for being upset. He doesn't care about you or your relationship...he has no respect. So awful to be said things like that from someone that's supposed to love you. Love yourself, be free and move on.

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41 minutes ago, Iredeindigo said:

I just feel like I don’t know how to let it go, him looking at other women is making me less and less attracted to him

People do. look at others... be worried when they act on it.

BUT..

I think the words below can explain this plenty....

41 minutes ago, Iredeindigo said:

He says our sex life sucks and I don’t seem attractive to him, but he gets angry at me almost every time we try and holds things against me

HE is pathetic 😞   Very insensitive.. WHY are you still involved with this dude??

 

42 minutes ago, Iredeindigo said:

I feel like I’m losing my mind

Yes, you are losing yourself... because he is not too kind, at all.

Get out of this crap... be with someone who DOES fancy you & appreciate you.

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10 hours ago, Iredeindigo said:

. He says our sex life sucks and I don’t seem attractive to him, but he gets angry at me almost every time we try and holds things against me. 

Sorry this is happening. It's not about images of women. It's about his mental and verbal abuse.

How long have you been dating? Do you live together? 

Talk to trusted friends and family about the verbal abuse. Develop a plan to extricate yourself from this situation.

Immediately delete and block him and all his people from ALL your social media and messaging apps.

Read up on emotional abuse and how damaging it is to your self respect.

He's just trying to wear you down one slap in the face after another. That's not what relationships are for.

 

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Whenever someone doesn't own the capacity to view you through the right lens, they are also not capable of seeing and appreciating your unique value.

So skip them.

Never base your own view of yourself on the limits of anyone else's lens. Relax into being who you ARE, and consider, instead, that anyone who would demonstrate disrespect for you does not deserve to be near YOU.

Head high, and walk forward. Leave this guy in the dust!

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