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His girl mate is ruining my mental health


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37 minutes ago, Hollyj said:

Rachael,  You gave some sound advice to HeyHale. I think that you need to apply the same to your situation.

How would you advise a sibling or friend in the same situation?

I know and I understand. But the difference in my situation is that I'm currently dealing with a missed miscarriage. Whoch has started happening. Part of me feels unhinged with myself like I wasn't aware my baby had died. So it makes me question everything. I don't feel right in my choices or my environment. 

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1 hour ago, Jibralta said:

She was now married with kids. She'd found him on facebook, and had contacted him to catch up.

Wow!  I think a lot of affairs start that way.  People can find their old ex's or crushes a lot easier now with social media.

Every ex-boyfriend I had has tried to contact me randomly on facebook years later (while obviously married and with a different last name!).  Only one felt like he was genuinely trying to just be friendly, yet still was, "making sure I was still happy.

What on earth does that mean other than trying to see if there's a way to wedge into your current marriage/relationship?  

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1 hour ago, Rachaeljay27 said:

But the difference in my situation is that I'm currently dealing with a missed miscarriage. Whoch has started happening. Part of me feels unhinged with myself like I wasn't aware my baby had died.

I'm so so sorry 😞 I've had 2 miscarriages, both were horrible and devastating.  

You may want to spend some time offline just being kind to yourself and watching movies and laying low if possible.

Women process miscarriages differently... some need more time than others.  Take the time you need to really process your pain, block things out that don't help you or stress you out too much.

Try to feel for your boyfriend, too, because it was his baby he lost also and he's probably feeling some of the same emotions just in different ways 😞 

If you can be together with him relaxing/mourning the loss, that may help bond you both closer.  

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