da0804 Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 Me and this boy have been speaking for about 5 months, we have been seeing and exclusive with each other for about 3. I recently found out he pulled someone else a few nights ago but when I asked if he has ever done anything like that he said no. We have both been stressed recently and not in the best headspace, but I’m unsure if I should be bothered or not? He says he does want a relationship but as I would be his first wants to take it slow. I’ve told him how I feel about him and he says he feels the same. Should I be bothered or not? As we are not completely official I’m unsure what to think, although he has said we will be official soon. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 If he's hitting on other girls, he isn't ready for a relationship. Sorry OP, but I would see myself out. He's not into you the same way you're into him. He wouldn't be trying to pick up other girls if he were. At least now you know not to waste any more time on him. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 52 minutes ago, da0804 said: . I recently found out he pulled someone else a few nights ago but when I asked if he has ever done anything like that he said no. Sorry to hear that. How did you come across this information? What does "pulled someone" mean? Sex? When you confronted him did he lie to you? If you feel he's fooling around behind your back, step back from this and carefully observe what's going on. Link to comment
da0804 Posted December 28, 2020 Author Share Posted December 28, 2020 28 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: Sorry to hear that. How did you come across this information? What does "pulled someone" mean? Sex? When you confronted him did he lie to you? If you feel he's fooling around behind your back, step back from this and carefully observe what's going on. By pulled I would think from where I am from its kissing, I seen a text pop up from one of his good girl friends (who is also friends with the girl he pulled) he was quiet when I asked him so I kept asking and he said he wouldn’t ever want to hurt me and when I told him how I felt he had tears slightly come from his eyes Link to comment
Andrina Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 Let's call it what it is--cheating. You two became exclusive 2 months ago and he kissed another woman. You wouldn't kiss another guy, I'm assuming, while exclusive. Your ethics don't match his. You can't have a good relationship with someone with poor ethics. How could you trust him again when he already crossed boundaries in a dealbreaker way? After knowing you 5 months, shouldn't he know everything he needs to know to be "official" with you? If you continue on with him at this point, he's know that kissing another girl is not a dealbreaker for you and he can do whatever he wants because your self esteem is so low you're willing to settle for a cheater. Don't grasp for straws and give excuses because of "stress." That's not a free pass to cheat. Cut this toxic fish loose and go fishing for a keeper. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 You call him a "boy". How old are the two of you? How do you know he "pulled" this other girl? Link to comment
Hollyj Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 He has cheated and lied. He cannot be trusted, stop making excuses. This is not someone you want to keep around. I would end it. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 During a pandemic, I wouldn't want to be around anyone who I couldn't trust not to share AIR space with other people, much less kiss them. Decide whether your own self worth is so low that you'd be willing to settle for a relationship with someone you don't trust. If so, then here you are. If not, then walk away. What other outcome are you seeking? Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 I'm not sure how you can be "exclusive" but not yet official? How does that work? Link to comment
Jibralta Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 11 hours ago, da0804 said: As we are not completely official I’m unsure what to think, although he has said we will be official soon. What you should think is, "He's already broken an important promise to me by kissing someone else. That's enough for me to know that he can't be trusted, and that I shouldn't waste any time on this one." Don't fall for those crocodile tears. You're being strung along. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted December 28, 2020 Share Posted December 28, 2020 10 minutes ago, HeartGoesOn said: I'm not sure how you can be "exclusive" but not yet official? How does that work? And he says he doesn't want a relationship. When you get mixed messages like this. . it never ends well. I think he's messin' with your head a little here. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted December 29, 2020 Share Posted December 29, 2020 8 hours ago, reinventmyself said: And he says he doesn't want a relationship. When you get mixed messages like this. . it never ends well. I think he's messin' with your head a little here. Yep. It means he wants YOU to be loyal while not expecting the same from him. That's turd territory. Link to comment
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