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What to do when you’ve broke your exs heart and trust

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Hello , I was dating my ex for a few months and I was talking to him since April but when I first met his friends and stayed at his house I got so drunk to the point I was insulting him and his friends which I really don’t remember doing and in the morning he broke up with me , his friends now hate me and he doesn’t want to hear my apology and doesn’t trust me because I hurt him so badly , I am very sorry , so upset and very ashamed at what I said and did and I wish I could turn back the clock and redo everything because I really was happy , any advice ?

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Do you usually react like this when you drink? I ask just because I'm curious if you've experienced this before. You may also not remember clearly but were antagonized by him or the party in some way. Do you think that's a possibility? 

It doesn't sound like a healthy situation anyway. Why put yourself through this rollercoaster with company you always have to feel bad around? Take time to let the dust settle and see what happens and how you feel later. Slow down on the guilt. You said you were sorry so let things be for awhile. Your self-confidence is in the gutter and his reaction to you after the party was extreme also. Don't react anymore. Just observe. Let us know how you feel in the next few days!

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