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Worried about how my family will treat my girlfriend.


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So, just an update for everyone... this get together will likely still happen, but my girlfriend and I won't be going. I am on quarantine for ten days because there's a chance I could have covid. There have been several confirmed cases where I work, most of which are people who work in or go in and out of the quality lab, and I go in the lab regularly. I got really sick out of the blue yesterday and had to go get tested. The doctor wants me home at least until the results come back. And my girlfriend works for a company that has a lot of immune-compromised clients. Her boss already told her if she starts showing any symptoms she will be off for two weeks and if she gets sick she could lose her job. So we are staying 6 feet away from each other even at home right now.

 

All these replies were helpful though, so thanks to everyone. My family will meet her eventually even if not this weekend.

 

My heart goes out to you and GF. Holding you both in my thoughts and hoping for a safe and healthy outcome.

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I see your point, but...there are a lot of people who DO associate missing/broken/otherwise "bad" teeth with drug use, being "low class," etc. I have heard/seen a lot of "hillbilly" and "meth head" jokes about people with less-than-perfect teeth, and I remember when my mom had lost a couple of teeth (and put off getting them fixed because of severe anxiety about having a major procedure), she NEVER smiled because she knew people would ask "What happened to your teeth?" and people actually did. I 've had students who dealt with this as well. I'm not generalizing that all Americans think this about teeth -- of course they don't -- but it's prevalent enough that a lot of people are very self-conscious about it.

 

That said, I agree with you about the sister. Yikes. Reading stuff like this makes me very grateful for my sister!

 

It is sad to think that people do make these types of judgements. No one knows what is happening in that individuals life. It must be very embarrassing and hurtful for anyone to be on the receiving end of this type of ignorance.

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It is sad to think that people do make these types of judgements. No one knows what is happening in that individuals life. It must be very embarrassing and hurtful for anyone to be on the receiving end of this type of ignorance.

 

Yea... idk it might be a small town thing. We live in a city with a population of about 30k. And this town is about an hour away from a Major US city, but the small town mentality is strong here.

 

I get a lot of judgments like this too and I have perfect teeth. But I have visible tattoos and my hair is usually a combo of un-natural colors (currently blue and green.) A lot of people assume I have a criminal record, that I'm uneducated, and that I do a lot of drugs. I worked for a non profit a while back. Occasionally we would have people there volunteering as part of their community service. A lot of people just assumed that about me. I also used to volunteer at an animal shelter and people assumed I was there as part of some court order, etc. I've had people come up to me on the street out of nowhere and just asked me to sell them drugs. I just have to laugh to myself. I worked with drug addicts for years. Most of them look like everyone else. I have a Fine Art degree. I own a business. I have no criminal record. And I could pass a piss test any day of the week. These kinds of assumptions used to really bother me. But not so much anymore. It's more about them than it is about me.

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Yea... idk it might be a small town thing. We live in a city with a population of about 30k. And this town is about an hour away from a Major US city, but the small town mentality is strong here.

 

I get a lot of judgments like this too and I have perfect teeth. But I have visible tattoos and my hair is usually a combo of un-natural colors (currently blue and green.) A lot of people assume I have a criminal record, that I'm uneducated, and that I do a lot of drugs. I worked for a non profit a while back. Occasionally we would have people there volunteering as part of their community service. A lot of people just assumed that about me. I also used to volunteer at an animal shelter and people assumed I was there as part of some court order, etc. I've had people come up to me on the street out of nowhere and just asked me to sell them drugs. I just have to laugh to myself. I worked with drug addicts for years. Most of them look like everyone else. I have a Fine Art degree. I own a business. I have no criminal record. And I could pass a piss test any day of the week. These kinds of assumptions used to really bother me. But not so much anymore. It's more about them than it is about me.

 

You are right. It is them. In my city, you would not get a second look. I love the diversity and the freedom for people to express themselves. One of the many reasons I moved here.

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