Jump to content
'

URGENT ADVICE NEEDED: Suicide and ow to stay consistent with cutting family off?


Recommended Posts

I was cut off by my family. I posted about the situation on other threads.

 

In short: my family (mainly my mother) doesnt want me around. However I'm coping with a sexual assault and I want someone around but that isnt a realistic desire for my situation.

 

I am struggling with this SEVERELY. And although I'm getting help I still go home to an empty apartment and I'm craving love.

 

That mindset is placing me in a position where I'm itching to contact family even though I was told not to make contact. I spend 60% of my life fighting the urge to reach out even though I'm not supposed to. I feel very alone

Link to post
Share on other sites

A therapist can help me but a therapist can't hold me when I need it. I was told not to contact my family by my mother. But I spend majority of this time fighting the urge to reach out. Whenever I get good news I want to contact my family despite them telling me not to. (I talk myself our of it) How can I cope with this or curve this desire?

 

ALSO...A BIT OFF TOPIC..

How can I cope with losing material things that hold meaning for me? I moved out the other day but I had to bring only what I could carry to my new apartment and I had to leave a lot of sentimental stuff that will probably be thrown away. I had a photo of my late grandmother, some art projects and a bunch of other things that I bought myself over the years. I don't have any clothing to wear to job interviews and I'm taking a giant financial loss because the belongs I bought myself will be thrown out. I was able to locate a food bank so I'm set with that but all my clothing I do have is dirty and I worry about my ability to present myself in a job interview. Does anyone know of any government organizations or non profits that can help me with getting living necessities? I'm in my early 20s and enrolled in school if that helps.

 

I've been wondering if life is even worth it

Link to post
Share on other sites

Go to the department of social services. They can help you with housing assistance, food stamps, mental and physical health care, career training, job placement and perhaps support groups . Start looking online for state agencies as well as local recourses through your city/county as well as private organizations, such as faith based groups, etc.

Does anyone know of any government organizations or non profits that can help me with getting living necessities? I'm in my early 20s and enrolled in school if that helps.
Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sorry this is happening to you. What was the reason you got kicked out of the house and told never to make contact again? What happened to cause that?

 

I don't think anyone can stop you from picking up your own personal belongings unless there is some kind of restraining order in place.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Lookup your local police non-emergency number and call them to find out if they can escort you to your family home to collect your belongings. That's a pretty common request, so it's not something that they don't know how to accommodate.

 

We've suggested a call to a suicide hotline, and there are many to be found on the internet. They can help you to find local resources, but most are likely posted on the Internet.

 

You are in school, and your tuition covers mental health counseling. You've already paid for the services, so use them to your advantage.

 

Phone your therapist for a referral to a social worker who can help you to find and apply for resources.

 

In the absence of love from someone else, rather than talking yourself into believing that you are suffering, talk yourself into recognizing how much and how well you can love your Self at this time. View every baby step you make forward as an accomplishment, and build your pride in how many of those steps add up.

 

Recognize that you will reach a point where this hardest of times is in your rearview mirror, and you will thank yourself for your resilience and ability to bounce back from this.

 

Head high, and keep taking baby steps. One at a time.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Just one more thing I was thinking of... if you're the same person I'm thinking of... did your mom used to strangle you when you were ages 3-4 and abuse you physically etc to the point where your grandparents had to take you in?

 

If you are... when I first read your post on the mental trauma you've endured over the years with you mom, and how it was always ongoing... I just felt so much pain for you. I think your life is going to be painful - extremely painful - as long as you have your mom in your life. She's borderline sadistic in her treatment of you and as long as she's there, she's **going** to hurt you.

 

I think... accepting that is really hard, but it's probably the only way to heal and move on and release the trauma you've experienced. Because having her in your life is just going to be ongoing trauma....

 

You have to protect yourself and she needs to be cut loose.

 

If you're not the same person then disregard... BUT if she really was abusive, I tend to think it still applies that the best thing for you longterm is to just cut her out of your life.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I see the post quoting scriptures about parents abandoning you was deleted, that's ok I didn't realize it was against forum rules.

 

I do think spiritual healing is valid for some people though. It wasn't my own personal experience, but actually my mother's (who had extremely abusive parents). My mom broke the cycle of abuse, and made a totally different life for herself, and she personally accredits that to Christianity. If she hadn't been able to heal from her childhood abuse, I don't know what MY childhood would have been like to be honest. But it was wonderful and I ended up marrying a heroic man and amazing father to our 4 kids

 

I also have an awesome mentor woman (a second mom really) in her 50's who had abusive parents and she also accredits her healing to Christianity. I wouldn't deny it definitely helps probably a lot more people than we'd realize. Her daughters are adults now and living good balanced lives - and she also broke that cycle of abuse. It just takes ONE person :D and they can change the course of their future family's legacy.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Take advantage of your school's mental health resources. They are there to help.

 

Do you have anyone there you can talk with? A friend you can trust? If you need to, please keep posting here. We might not be able to solve everything, but we can be here to give support and encouragement. We're all wanting the best for you and to see you get through this.

 

Always remember you are a good person who deserves better then what you've experienced. You are not responsible for how you have been treated. Things will get better. Love yourself, and have faith.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...