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Don’t want to be thinking this but, stopped having sex


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Hello all, this is a first time post for me so I thank you for all advice given. This is not meant to be a poor me post, just hoping to get some opinions. So to start off, I’m 26 and my GF is 27. We’ve been together a little over two years together. During the first year, we would go on dates, have movie nights, I’d surprise her with flowers and gifts every now and then also sex multiple times a week. I will say my sex drive is fairly high and could have it once or twice a day. I know sex isn’t everything in a relationship and expected it to drop off a little over time. I’d easily settle for twice a week because, I enjoy our time together.The second year things were still going great between us and decided to get a house together. It was a great feeling and felt like our connection was stronger than ever. However, thats when our sex life really slowed down. It went down to maybe once every 3 weeks. Even during this time I would still show her love and support her helped her finish school, along with going on dates and a cruise.

Now leading up to current day, we have sex maybe once a month currently going on a month and a half. I have talked to her about it in a very nice way with no fighting or blaming. She would tell me it’s not all about sex and try to make it seem like that all I care about or would say she’s too tired. Lastly, she says she doesn’t feel comfortable as we both put on a little weight since the beginning of our relationship. In which I’ve understood. I try support and her wanting to lose weight as well as make her feel sexy but not too aggressive by complementing how she looks and try to initiate sex sometimes but getting tired of getting shot down every time. So then I tried to back off of it and see if she would imitate sex when she was ready all it’s done is lead to no sexual contact at all. I don’t feel good about this because sex Is a very important and emotional connection I feel like. I also that feel that we should be comfortable around each other no matter what because, I lover her for who she is and not her body.

 

She does have a friend that lives in another town. It’s a female though and she’s hung out over there a couple times in the past two months on fridays and return on Saturday afternoons. I only added this because when she came home last weekend she went and changed when she got home There was a thong that you could tell had been worn was laying on the bathroom floor. ( she never wears thongs because she says she dont like them) so I asked the next day over a light coversation without accusing if she had wore a thong out. She got real defensive and offended while denying it. She blamed my dog for the reason they were out even though previously they were in the top drawer of her dresser and she could not account to why they were worn (was rolled). She went on to throw away the few thongs she had and was not happy with me at all. IM trying to believe her and said I was sorry but IM really having a hard time in my head right now.

 

Just an idea on a few things...

Last time with her dressing up for sex and the whole 9 yards was December 2019.

Other than that its been a few (quickies) and she worked the way down to only offering a handjob.

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