Need advice for girlfriend troubles

[shellyf62]

Don’t need you to be rude with it [emoji849]fact is though I have her address, her emails, logins she willingly gave me everything to show me proof she wasn’t playing me I never asked for them iv just never been to her area.

 

If I were you I would turn up at her address unannounced & find out exactly what is going on

[foxmaster300]

If I were you I would turn up at her address unannounced & find out exactly what is going on

 

That’s one of the plans that’s being thought of right now. Almost happened a few weeks ago but had to think more about it. But most definitely going to be showing up at her place soon. What she doesn’t know is a friend of my and my cousin live close to her. So I always have backup and iv also notified police about the situation in case anything goes down

[Capricorn3]

My only advice would be: ...... whatever you do, do NOT buy a house with this woman. There are way too many red flags with this one and it would be very wise to step back and rethink this entire relationship. If it were me, I'd run.

[boltnrun]

I wonder if the money is already spent...

[foxmaster300]

My only advice would be: ...... whatever you do, do NOT buy a house with this woman. There are way too many red flags with this one and it would be very wise to step back and rethink this entire relationship. If it were me, I'd run.

 

I’m already in talks with a friend of mine to get our own place. She doesn’t know anything about it and I refuse to tell her

[foxmaster300]

I wonder if the money is already spent...

 

Nope it’s not. I have access to all her accounts. From emails to her PayPal n bank stuff n Facebook she gave it all to me willingly I didn’t even ask for them. So I checked to make sure she didn’t use the money and she hasn’t

[melancholy123]

I too dont think she wants to move in with you.

[foxmaster300]

I too dont think she wants to move in with you.

 

That’s what I’m starting to think because this has been going on for a year

[Capricorn3]

we came into some money to get our own place together.

Just curious about this. You've never been to her place and this seems to be a semi long distance relationship, so I'm trying to figure out how the two of you came into some money and how come it seems to be in her bank account? Is this her money? Your money? You both have 50/50? ~so confused~

[MissCanuck]

Oh boy.

 

OP, it is a gigantic red flag that you have never once been to her house in all your time dating, and she wiggles out of every attempt to visit her. She is not being honest about this roommate of hers, I promise you that. He is likely her boyfriend. Having her log-ins means nothing. You have no idea how many other accounts she might use that you don't have any access to at all. This woman has been playing you for a fool, man.

 

At the risk of sounding insensitive - why the heck did you think it would be a good idea to move in with such an evasive and secretive person?

[Hollyj]

Don’t need you to be rude with it [emoji849]fact is though I have her address, her emails, logins she willingly gave me everything to show me proof she wasn’t playing me I never asked for them iv just never been to her area.

 

Is this for real? You have never been to her place, met her family or friends, and turned over money. C'mon!

[Hollyj]

I wonder if the money is already spent...

 

The money is gone. I cannot understand why he would send her the money. Sorry OP, but your actions have been very foolish.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately it sounds like you built this thing up in your mind, with very little knowledge of her. For example, she has 2 kids, a BF in jail, lives with some guy and her exbf's family have her kids? Does that even sound true to you?

 

Do you really think sending money for a supposed real estate venture was to live together? It sounds like you are being scammed. To send her jailed bf money or for her to buy drugs, whatever. Immediately close the accounts and change all the passcodes.

 

Cut your losses, check your credit score, etc. and do not go to her house or send people there. Also 'we came into money' sounds rather shady.

my girlfriend for about two years we came into some money to get our own place together.

[LaHermes]

OP you remarked:

 

"for dating locally I’m not up for that in my area girls here aren’t very...good "

 

They sure can't be much worse than this current rather flaky individual.

 

And you are even contemplating on having your family meet her!

 

"Right now my family is more focused on wanting to meet her and see what type of person she is"

 

 

Boy, are they in for a surprise.

[foxmaster300]

Just curious about this. You've never been to her place and this seems to be a semi long distance relationship, so I'm trying to figure out how the two of you came into some money and how come it seems to be in her bank account? Is this her money? Your money? You both have 50/50? ~so confused~

 

My money her family decided to help me save it so the only person who has any access to the account is her father she doesn’t work at all. Her dad asked to help because he knows that she’d spend it all on useless stuff

[Wiseman2]

Whose money is it? If any of it is yours, why does her father rather than you have access to it? You are getting scammed, get your money back.

My money her family decided to help me save it so the only person who has any access to the account is her father she doesn’t work at all. Her dad asked to help because he knows that she’d spend it all on useless stuff

[foxmaster300]

OP you remarked:

 

"for dating locally I’m not up for that in my area girls here aren’t very...good "

 

They sure can't be much worse than this current rather flaky individual.

 

And you are even contemplating on having your family meet her!

 

"Right now my family is more focused on wanting to meet her and see what type of person she is"

 

 

Boy, are they in for a surprise.

 

I’m not contemplating on having them meet her. That’s something THEY want to do on their own at first they never even knew about her until they saw me on the phone with her a bit ago. I’m not gonna let my family meet some crazy chick who can’t get herself together my parents would call her out on sight 🤣

[boltnrun]

Why did you need "help" saving your own money? I presume you could have put it into a savings or investment account and have a professional manage it.

 

Is her father a professional money manager and that's why you chose to give him access to your funds?

 

When the chips are down, whose side do you think her father will take? Yours or hers?

 

And what do you mean by local woman are "not good"?

[foxmaster300]

Why did you need "help" saving your own money? I presume you could have put it into a savings or investment account and have a professional manage it.

 

Is her father a professional money manager and that's why you chose to give him access to your funds?

 

When the chips are down, whose side do you think her father will take? Yours or hers?

 

And what do you mean by local woman are "not good"?

 

He just decided to help and she passed it to him. And he won’t be in favor of her iv already got that taken care of. And in my area a lot of the locals are drama starters or drug users or people know them from a record they have with an ex and all that. I’m not really into all that

[tattoobunnie]

You don't need other people to help you save your own money. Get your own savings account - it's not hard. Takes 20 minutes at any bank in the world. Get your money back asap, and tell them you are putting it into your own savings account. Do NOT LEAVE IT WITH THEM!

[boltnrun]

He just decided to help and she passed it to him. And he won’t be in favor of her iv already got that taken care of. And in my area a lot of the locals are drama starters or drug users or people know them from a record they have with an ex and all that. I’m not really into all that

 

So she has full access to pass YOUR own money to her father? How come you didn't have any say in that decision?

 

Were you just going along with whatever she wanted to try to keep her?

 

I recommend you get your money back from her father today. Don't delay.

[Wiseman2]

But she is "all that". Hopefully you are just pulling legs, because you claim you gave away all this money you mysteriously "came into" and consort with a woman who lives with a mystery man, whose place you have never seen or been to, has kids by more mystery men, has another mystery man in jail and her kids live with yet another mystery man's family.

the locals are drama starters or drug users or people know them from a record they have with an ex and all that. I’m not really into all that

[HeartGoesOn]

I have access to all her accounts. From emails to her PayPal n bank stuff n Facebook she gave it all to me willingly I didn’t even ask for them. So I checked to make sure she didn’t use the money and she hasn’t

 

If the above is true, why would you be "half tempted" (as stated in post #14) to ask for your money back? Obviously there's more, or possibly less to this story.

[MissCanuck]

Have you spoken to her father, OP? As in a live conversation?

[foxmaster300]

Have you spoken to her father, OP? As in a live conversation?

Long distance relationship. So he’s contacted me before about somethings and so has her brother and her aunt