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A bloodchoke, still kind of nervous about it


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Hi everyone, I hope you all are well. Thanks for all the advice you’ve given me in the past.

So I’m a bit kinky in that I like some mild neck holds during sex. My boy is comfortable with it so we do that from time to time.

 

This last time however, he went a bit too hard and I saw the room darken. Next thing I know I see flashes of images and lights and suddenly I open my eyes, and my concerned boyfriend is freaking out, worried sick. I didn’t know why he was scared, until he recapped what happened. Apparently, I sagged to the side, made jerking motions, and then started to snore. It lasted only a second. I had passed out.

 

He asked me some basic questions to test my consciousness and though correct, I was slow in answering who the president of the United States is. Afterwards, I was sleepy and had a headache and my neck was hurting.

 

I told him I don’t want to do anything like that anymore, so at least that is settled. However I’m still reeling from the event. Could there have been any damage done to me, despite it being only a second I was out? Has anyone ever had this happen?

Thanks 😊

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You need to see a doctor. Sadly many erotic asphyxia cases end in death. Not necessarily the first times due to amateurish practices, but when confidence is gained and they up the ante.

 

The high is the anoxia (lack of oxygen). When your body is harmed by a lack of oxygen, it's called a hypoxic-anoxic injury. (google it)

 

So while there may not be lasting damage, good idea to see your doctor and be candid about it.

Apparently, I sagged to the side, made jerking motions, and then started to snore. It lasted only a second. I had passed out
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Realistically it was much more than a second. Yes, cutting off oxygen to the brain can cause damage. Yes, you do need to see a doctor for a check up and you are correct in never ever engaging in this kind of behavior again. People do die from this more often than you realize. It's just too easy for things to go a bit too far and it can happen fast and unexpectedly. A tragic accident that ultimately destroys lives, as in ends one and leaves another one in jail for manslaughter.

 

There are better ways to get an adrenaline rush than being choked to death..... Might want to put some thought into that.

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You need medical attention, OP.

 

That didn't all happen in a second. It lasted longer than either of you really realize, and the fact that you were jerking is concerning. Please, call your doctor. Be open about what happened so they properly evaluate you.

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Actually your bf should have called 911 or taken you to an er if you lost consciousness. not play doctor asking orientation questions.

 

It takes a split second to go into a cardiac arrhythmia from this or do some brain damage. Good you are seeing a doctor. be frank, they've heard all this before.

 

You need to reconsider a relationship with someone too high risk oriented and too stupid to do the right thing when he got in over his head.

My boyfriend told me yesterday that he would’ve stopped if I told him to.

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Thanks for all the help.

I went and I’m ok. She was glad to hear I wouldn’t be engaging in any more of this behavior.

 

The thing is, right after it happened I was sleepy and my BF told me to stay awake. Suddenly I was having an uncontrolled laughing fit; I was feeling loopy. He went right to his video game and I lay in bed. He later claimed my laughing made it seem like I was totally fine.

 

After about 20 min I started feeling nauseous and my head and neck hurt and told him I really wanted him to hold me a bit. He took a break from the game and asked me if I wanted to go to the ER. I stupidly said I didn’t think I needed to..and a couple minutes later he was wrapped in his game.

 

He obviously was concerned about me but I kind of wish he didn’t joke about it afterwards. He mimicked my flailing movement and pretended he would squeeze my neck again. Maybe my pain made it harder to take the joke, but I didn’t laugh. He often makes jokes about heavy things to lighten the mood. I’ve always wondered if it’s because he’s been through a lot in his life.

 

The next day he did call a lot to see how I was. Sometimes I wonder though how important I am compared to his games.

Edited by caraviolin
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Thanks for all the help.

I went and I’m ok. She was glad to hear I wouldn’t be engaging in any more of this behavior.

 

The thing is, right after it happened I was sleepy and my BF told me to stay awake. Suddenly I was having an uncontrolled laughing fit; I was feeling loopy. He went right to his video game and I lay in bed. He later claimed my laughing made it seem like I was totally fine.

 

After about 20 min I started feeling nauseous and my head and neck hurt and told him I really wanted him to hold me a bit. He took a break from the game and asked me if I wanted to go to the ER. I stupidly said I didn’t think I needed to..and a couple minutes later he was wrapped in his game.

 

He obviously was concerned about me but I kind of wish he didn’t joke about it afterwards. He mimicked my flailing movement and pretended he would squeeze my neck again. Maybe my pain made it harder to take the joke, but I didn’t laugh. He often makes jokes about heavy things to lighten the mood. I’ve always wondered if it’s because he’s been through a lot in his life.

 

The next day he did call a lot to see how I was. Sometimes I wonder though how important I am compared to his games.

 

Different people react to things differently. It doesn't make him a bad person. That said, it does sound like if you want him to stop joking around, you'll have to be very very blunt about the fact that what happened is not a laughing matter and that you don't appreciate him trying to turn it into a joke and that he needs to knock it off immediately. Think hammer to nail kind of approach.

 

Overall, most people don't actually know how to react to bad situations. Easy to say from the bleacher seats and in 20/20 hindsight - should've done this or that. This is something to keep in mind for you in general. If you engage in risky or dangerous behavior, don't expect people around you to know what to do if things go sideways. In fact, expect that they won't react well or correctly at all.

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Thanks for all the help.

I went and I’m ok. She was glad to hear I wouldn’t be engaging in any more of this behavior.

 

The thing is, right after it happened I was sleepy and my BF told me to stay awake. Suddenly I was having an uncontrolled laughing fit; I was feeling loopy. He went right to his video game and I lay in bed. He later claimed my laughing made it seem like I was totally fine.

 

After about 20 min I started feeling nauseous and my head and neck hurt and told him I really wanted him to hold me a bit. He took a break from the game and asked me if I wanted to go to the ER. I stupidly said I didn’t think I needed to..and a couple minutes later he was wrapped in his game.

 

He obviously was concerned about me but I kind of wish he didn’t joke about it afterwards. He mimicked my flailing movement and pretended he would squeeze my neck again. Maybe my pain made it harder to take the joke, but I didn’t laugh. He often makes jokes about heavy things to lighten the mood. I’ve always wondered if it’s because he’s been through a lot in his life.

 

The next day he did call a lot to see how I was. Sometimes I wonder though how important I am compared to his games.

 

You teach people how to treat you. There's nothing you can do now to prevent the previous incident because it's happened already but I think you should be very wary and cautious going forward. I agree - stop with these types of bedroom games if both of you don't have enough basic respect for each other. You're hurt emotionally and your body also went into survival mode as you had to recuperate from something life-threatening. He offered to take you to the ER so accept that with some grace. Yes, he cares for you but no, he may not have the same level of maturity as you either in other areas.

 

For the moment don't drown yourself in woe and despair. Get up and pick yourself up from this incident and learn from it. Feeling down and out about this or broken will lead to worse decisions down the line or knock your self-esteem. Tell yourself "I'm lucky I'm fine this time around but I won't subject myself to something like this again." If your boyfriend starts making jokes, remain detached and be vocal if you don't appreciate it. Don't start feeling sorry for yourself about what happened. What matters is that you are ok now so make use of this experience and go on to lead a happy and fulfilling life or relationship with this person. Don't stand up for stupidity or any danger or threat to your life.

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