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i need a bit of advice


Creamybutter
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so i met this guy on a dating app a year ago, and loooong story short - he was very interested in me, we had a great connection but when we met in person I felt no chemistry at all. We stayed in touch for a while to see if there was anything there but i was just not feeling it so i was very honest with him. We kind of stayed as friends as we had a great rapport and similar wavelength...and pretty clear that I have no romantic aspirations here.

 

Recently i met his friend who is also single and i really like him. Now im not sure what to do because im not directly in touch with his friend and its too awkward to ask him.

What do I do?

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I'd say be patient. You'll probably get a chance to meet the friend again and see if you can exchange contact info then. You already know you can't ask for his number.

 

Thing to keep in mind though is that the friend might not be interested in dating you since his buddy had a crush on you or tried to date you in the past. In short, something might happen or nothing. Either way, keep looking at other options. Sucks when you like the friend better, but.....that's life.

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Ok thank you all. it’s really unfortunate when you like someone as a person and are so compatible but feel no attraction or chemistry. Like I would not want to get close to them or kiss them but fine with hugs as friends. I didn’t like the way they smelled or looked and no natural desire to get close.

 

I battled with this for a while and finally realised I had to end it. Is this very common? It’s just really sad coz I find it difficult to come across guys who I share a connection with :(

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Good for you for ending it if it wasn't right for you. Yes, it's common. Don't sell yourself short. Start (or get back in touch) mingling with your friends and chatting about things other than dating or even about dating if you want to. I don't know anyone who thought it was easy to date off a dating app. It's a good idea also to check in with yourself every now and then and see whether you're interested in getting to know someone. Just as you're taking a look at others, others are also taking a good look at you and asking themselves if you're someone worth getting to know.

 

If you're feeling burnt out or need a break, it's ok to take a break from dating. There is nothing wrong with that. Take a look at the profiles a bit more also and you can spot the signs usually a mile away.

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How close is your friendship with the first guy? If you've left left things awkward, then yes, it would not be wise to ask him to help you get in touch with his friend. It could lead to hurt feelings on his part and could make him feel used. However, if you are on good terms and he is the kind of guy who understands that you simply didn't work out and has no problem with how things ended up, then why not ask? There are plenty of good people out there who would be fine with helping two friends connect. I would have no problem doing so for my friends. Because, in the end, all I would want is for them to be happy.

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