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I think I’m going to vomit


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I just reconnected with my youngest half sister after 10 years of no communication. She is 12 years younger than me and still lives with her parents (I’m 29 and she is 17). I moved out right when I turned 18 because my mother and stepfather (my half sister’s real father) abused me pretty badly. Never sexual, but I got beat up almost weekly. Punched, strangled, hair cut off, and extremely cruel punishments for no reason that I’m embarrassed to tell about. I got the abuse the worst because I wasn’t his biological child. So I moved out and never looked back. My sister isn’t allowed to speak to me but is sneaking around to do so. Anyways, my sister is also abused, just not as bad. But, wHat makes me absolutely sick is that apparently my abuser (stepfather) is finishing up his degree to be a psychologist. HOW CAN SOMEONE WHO IS CLEARLY MENTALLY ILL BECOME A PSYCHOLOGIST?? I am seriously so upset about this and mad at myself for not having him arrested a long time ago.

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I am sorry that happened. Report it to the regulating authority for psychologists .

 

I thought about that but I just don’t know how to prove that he abused me. I never reported it to anyone. I just dealt with it and told myself it would be over soon. And then it was and I moved out.

And I’m sure my sister won’t want to report him either. It’s crazy how someone being abused can be so scared/unwilling to report it and still love their abuser.

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I thought about that but I just don’t know how to prove that he abused me. I never reported it to anyone. I just dealt with it and told myself it would be over soon. And then it was and I moved out.

And I’m sure my sister won’t want to report him either. It’s crazy how someone being abused can be so scared/unwilling to report it and still love their abuser.

 

It is not crazy at all it is very typical and normal. I am sorry for what you went through but report it to the regulatory board.

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It is not crazy at all it is very typical and normal. I am sorry for what you went through but report it to the regulatory board.

 

Thank you. I know I need to report it. It makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. He used to be a prison guard for many many years. Strange how he would decide to change his career at this point in his life and to want to be a psychologist. It just blows my mind.

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Thank you. I know I need to report it. It makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. He used to be a prison guard for many many years. Strange how he would decide to change his career at this point in his life and to want to be a psychologist. It just blows my mind.

 

He sounds very disturbed. I am sorry.

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Your word is your proof. Someone will take you seriously and will listen to you. No one is going to take it lightly if someone is training to be a psychologist and has these kind of allegations against them.

 

A psychologist is responsible for some very vulnerable people.

Because of this, it would be a crime to not report him. He is an abuser. He could do far more damage to people who are already in a bad way.

 

Please do the right thing and tell someone before he is allowed to potentially hurt people.

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Do you have a restraining order against him/them? Is your mother still with him? You can not really report something ( to where?, he is just studying to be.. no licence) there is no record of, however your mother and half sister need help and you could give them the resources you can find on domestic abuse.

 

Since your sister is a minor, why haven't you reported it to the police on her behalf? It sounds like she is trying to reach out but you are overly concerned with his studies, rather than her welfare. What he is 'studying to be" is irrelevant. Child abuse is a crime. Do you still speak to your mother?

She is 12 years younger than me and still lives with her parents (I’m 29 and she is 17).

 

My sister isn’t allowed to speak to me but is sneaking around to do so. Anyways, my sister is also abused, just not as bad.

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Do you have a restraining order against him/them? Is your mother still with him? You can not really report something ( to where?, he is just studying to be.. no licence) there is no record of, however your mother and half sister need help and you could give them the resources you can find on domestic abuse.

 

Since your sister is a minor, why haven't you reported it to the police on her behalf? It sounds like she is trying to reach out but you are overly concerned with his studies, rather than her welfare. What he is 'studying to be" is irrelevant. Child abuse is a crime. Do you still speak to your mother?

 

Mother is also an abuser, mainly due to her drug addiction issues. She acts insane and then doesn’t remember it the next day. And that’s not true about not being concerned about her welfare- she has begged me not to say anything or to even tell anyone she’s been in contact with me. Our middle sister did report them and the department of children and families investigated and decided that my sisters are just disobedient children. Step father is very good at fooling people that don’t know him. However, all family knows he has issues. I don’t think they know the extent of his issues but he does not get along with anyone.

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Are you in a position to have your sister move in with you?

 

She told me she doesn’t want to move until she graduates. She’s very involved in her school and said that she is okay. She tries to stay in her room and interact with parents as little as possible.She is also 5 hours away from me. She does have a lot of friends and stays with them frequently, which makes me feel better.

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Do you have a restraining order against him/them? Is your mother still with him? You can not really report something ( to where?, he is just studying to be.. no licence) there is no record of, however your mother and half sister need help and you could give them the resources you can find on domestic abuse.

 

Since your sister is a minor, why haven't you reported it to the police on her behalf? It sounds like she is trying to reach out but you are overly concerned with his studies, rather than her welfare. What he is 'studying to be" is irrelevant. Child abuse is a crime. Do you still speak to your mother?[/quote

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And also, me being a teacher, I have seen DCF let children down on a regular basis. They tend to side with parents for some odd reason. Even if it’s apparent to everyone around that some parents aren’t fit to be parents.

 

And it’s only really verbal/emotional abuse for her- which is hard to report.

Because like I said, her biological father isn’t as terrible to his own kids.

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Our middle sister did report them and the department of children and families investigated and decided that my sisters are just disobedient children..

The fact that they have been reported once before might validate what you have to say (if you report him). The more people who report him, the better. They can't ignore it if more people come forward.

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She told me she doesn’t want to move until she graduates. She’s very involved in her school and said that she is okay. She tries to stay in her room and interact with parents as little as possible.She is also 5 hours away from me. She does have a lot of friends and stays with them frequently, which makes me feel better.

 

Honestly, i get that she wants to finish school there. Is there a way you could go visit - go to her area and meet up with her whether she tells them she is going to a friends or do you have a relative that loves you both and can vouch - invite her to come over and no one will be the wiser that you were also there?

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She's reaching out to you. Try to be there and help her learn about domestic violence and abuse

 

You were smart to leave 10 yrs ago, but there's nothing to "report" with regard to the stepfathers studies.

And it’s only really verbal/emotional abuse for her

her biological father isn’t as terrible to his own kids.

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Sounds like your sister has her $%^& together. Just tell her if she ever needs help or just wants to talk you will be there for her.

 

as for your step father, I wonder if they will be doing interviews with friends and family, to make sure he is in good standing to even be in this profession.

 

The others are right, you could look into it, and report him, and later your sister. They will see there is a report of abuse on the records. Anyone knows, victims of abuse stay silent for years before they feel comfortable talking about it. They will take that into consideration.

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How does he go from prison guard to teacher to psychologist? It would be best to distance yourself from this source of info.

 

It’s true. I confirmed it by looking at the staff directory for that school. Honestly, he’s sick enough that I wouldn’t doubt if he decided to become a teacher because soon there won’t be any kids at home for him to abuse. He gets pleasure out of abusing and bullying people. But only people that he perceives to be “weaker” than him (women & children). He acts like a pu**y when grown men stand up to him. This is a sick person we are talking about here.

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It’s true. I confirmed it by looking at the staff directory for that school. Honestly, he’s sick enough that I wouldn’t doubt if he decided to become a teacher because soon there won’t be any kids at home for him to abuse. He gets pleasure out of abusing and bullying people. But only people that he perceives to be “weaker” than him (women & children). He acts like a pu**y when grown men stand up to him. This is a sick person we are talking about here.

 

And unfortunately, anyone with a bachelors degree can be a teacher. Which makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

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