Anxiety Help - Journal

[boltnrun]

Although I am now negative it doesn't mean I am symptom free!  Got the runs (TMI), I still tire VERY easily and the body aches are still here.  But mentally it helps a lot.

The kids didn't want to hug me and they kept their masks on indoors.  But I respect their choices and didn't berate them or tell them their precautions were silly.  We still had a very nice visit.  And my nephew gave my son a haircut!  For some reason that was really heartwarming.

I will hug them in a few months after we are vaccinated.

[boltnrun]

Today I feel a tremendous sense of relief.  And hope.  

It's a beautiful day.

[boltnrun]

I went on an in-person job interview.  The man interviewing me brought me into an office and closed the door despite there being a sign on the door that said "Maintain 6 feet of distance.  Only one person at a time allowed in the office".  His mask kept slipping down under his nose.  We were in there with the door closed for about 20 minutes.  We sat about 4 feet apart the whole time.

If I hadn't already had Covid I'm pretty sure I'd have it now, especially since one out of every three people in my county are infected.

WHY won't people follow safety protocols?  WHY are so many businesses only pretending to follow the recommendations?  WHY aren't the protocols being enforced?

No wonder we can't get a handle on this pandemic.

[boltnrun]

I'm sick again 😞  Same symptoms I had before, just as bad as they were before.  I don't know that this is a new infection.  I'm presuming it's just a continuation of the original infection.  I had two good weeks and now I'm down again.

I have to push through, though, because I have an interview tomorrow for a great job.  I'll load up on caffeine, antihistamines and pain killer and power through because I have to.

[Jibralta]

Good luck on your interview! Hope you feel better!

[Seraphim]

Good luck tomorrow! I hope you feel better . ❤️

[boltnrun]

Thank you to both of you!

I feel good about this position.  I know I can do it.  I just need my body to cooperate.

[boltnrun]

Got a second interview tomorrow.  I've had two second interviews during this job search with other companies and haven't gotten the job.  But I'm hopeful!

[Jibralta]

10 hours ago, boltnrun said:

Got a second interview tomorrow. 

Nice!!

10 hours ago, boltnrun said:

I've had two second interviews during this job search with other companies and haven't gotten the job.

Oh.

Still a good sign, though!

[Seraphim]

How did the interview go? How are you feeling ?

[boltnrun]

Hey!

So, I didn't get the job I went on the second interview for.  Apparently they told the staffing agent that I was "a GREAT interview!" and they really liked me but they are looking for "the perfect fit".  Which I get.  

I do believe there's a degree of ageism going on in some cases.  Everyone at that company except the owners appeared to be young to mid 20s.  So almost-55-year-old me would not have blended in very well.

However...I had a phone interview on Monday for a different position.  And despite only doing a 30 minute phone interview (no video), they called the staffing agent and said they wanted to offer me the position!  I need to pass a drug screen and a background check and once those results are in I am to start February 15th.  I'm not worried about the drug screen at all (lulz) but I had some credit issues about 6 or 7 years ago.  All of that has been resolved for quite some time but I hope that isn't reason enough to deny me the position.  And I didn't write bad checks or do anything criminal, I just got behind on bills because I was out of work for a few months.  However, I've paid all of that off and haven't had a single late payment since 2014.

Everything should be confirmed by the middle of next week.  Here's hoping it all goes well!

[Seraphim]

You will do great! 

[boltnrun]

Thank you!

I also am happy that I can get out of this house...BUT, there are almost no rentals available right now.  It's crazy how few properties there are.  I have to try to be patient, I guess.

And I do need to get out of here.  I love my brother dearly but we are starting to grate on each other.  Any conversation with him is basically a monologue where he'll go on and on for 15 to 30 minutes straight.  And if I try to insert a comment he complains that I "interrupted" him!  Well, I've been listening for 15 minutes straight!  When do I get a turn?  He does this to his kids too, just talks and talks and talks at them and all they get to say is "uh huh" or "that makes sense".  He's downstairs right now talking at his son and it's been him non stop for about 20 minutes.  And he's getting annoyed at my cat (understandably) because she is extremely vocal and will meow over and over and over.  It's more like a howl and since he works from home I can definitely understand why he gets annoyed.

All I need is one or two properties that meet the needs of me and my cousins.  But we can't even find that!  However it's only been a few days so I will keep searching.  I would love to be in a new place by mid-March.

[Jibralta]

11 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

And he's getting annoyed at my cat (understandably) because she is extremely vocal and will meow over and over and over.

Your cat sounds a lot like your brother 😄

[boltnrun]

39 minutes ago, Jibralta said:

Your cat sounds a lot like your brother 😄

LOL

[boltnrun]

One of my favorite football players was found dead today.  My heart is broken.

38 years old.  Way too early for him to be gone.

I hope he's at peace.

[boltnrun]

BTW, I got the job. I started Wednesday. 

[Seraphim]

Awesome ! 

[boltnrun]

So I've been on here a lot because the company I just started working for did not setup access to the required computer programs for me. I have literally been sitting in a chair doing absolutely nothing for the past 8 days.  It's been hellishly boring.

Hoping sometime next week I'll be able to be trained and then do some actual work.

[Jibralta]

1 hour ago, boltnrun said:

So I've been on here a lot because the company I just started working for did not setup access to the required computer programs for me. I have literally been sitting in a chair doing absolutely nothing for

Sounds like my first week in the office at my current job!!

[boltnrun]

Too much tedious detail to get into.  But still trying to get everything settled with the new job. At least I've received SOME training.

I am allowed to work from home but the internet service at my brother's house is terribly unreliable.  I got booted out 5 times during training and had to jump in my car to drive to the office.  It takes an hour and a half to drive to the office so I lost a few hours this week.  I bought a WiFi extender and hopefully that will help.  Otherwise I am going to be ready to make that drive again tomorrow if it still doesn't work.  And lose more hours.

Oh, and since I started this new job (2 1/2 weeks ago) they have had 3 new Covid cases.  Awesome.  More grateful than ever that I already had it.  Hope my turn for the vaccine comes soon!

Hoping I can move out into a new place with my cousins in about a month or so.

Stimulus money, please get here soon!

[boltnrun]

Still waiting to be trained. No one wants to take time out of their day to train me. But it took them so ridiculously long to get me access to the needed programs that the person I replaced left before he could train me.

At least I am at home, where I can do household tasks (and post on here!) while I wait for someone to decide to train me.

And yes, I have asked multiple times. 

I hope someday soon I will get to actually do the job they hired me to do.

[Seraphim]

11 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

Still waiting to be trained. No one wants to take time out of their day to train me. But it took them so ridiculously long to get me access to the needed programs that the person I replaced left before he could train me.

At least I am at home, where I can do household tasks (and post on here!) while I wait for someone to decide to train me.

And yes, I have asked multiple times. 

I hope someday soon I will get to actually do the job they hired me to do.

Same is happening to my husband the majority of his “ on the job “ training is calling a boss who is at home and to call if he needs help . 🤦‍♀️

[boltnrun]

I can't even try to do the work. I haven't been trained at all, except for one task that I already completed last week.

People are contacting me asking to complete tasks today. And I can't because I don't know how. My coworker told them I was getting trained today and will complete them, but no one has scheduled any training. I sure hope someone gets cracking on this. 

I really want this job and am happy I got it, but it's frustrating that I haven't been able to do anything yet!

[Seraphim]

🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️