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Long Distance relation feels like is going down hill.


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I'm sorry this is allot to read, but i have nowere to go or noone to talk to about this and just hope to get some neutral insight ..

this is me emptying my heart of what's been happening for the last few months:




i Love my girl very much

i alway's have and probably alway's will

but theres things that have been at light

in recent day's that i just i can't

i cannot understand.


She has made comparisons to me and another guy

a guy before me a very bad guy

a guy i saved her from a guy i litteraly

have fought to protect her and made him

go away.


And Yes ..

She told me in the end the situation that we have is different.

But still i cannot understand ..

Altho i have made the comparisson myself ..

Maybe in other way's then she did

i even told her this when she first actualy confimred this

even at a moment i was very vunrable and sad ..

it shook me ..


At least i'm happy she told me much later that the situation wasn't the same

And theres one key part to that ..

She has met another guy.

A guy she say's right now they are just friends ..

they just play games together ..

And i believe her.


Just ...


The situation is .. she was seeing or met this guy a while back ..

And i am not the jealous one maybe a little ...

She alway's told me i'm the cute kind of jealous ..

Never controlling or toxic ...


And it was fine, she meets guy's and girls and everything in between

All the time ..

But one day she told me she was upset .. it was him

i think it was just a month maybe two months in when she had met him ..


He apparently if i recall correct got upset with her playing a game

telling her to do something or that she didn't do things the right way

While she was more experienced and when she didn't listen he got mad

or somethin along those lines i don't exactly remember ..


I was just like owh, Well that kinda odd he would behave like that

treating you like that while he barely knows you even ..

And said something well people are idiots, something we alway's

say about people but fine ..


Not even a week further i think i noticed him speaking on her Discord again

and Then playing again, it was fine i'm not the judgemental type

and i really know nothing about this guy ..

altho i asked a little what was up with him and if he was okay

or why after he wronged her in a way she got upset that they were

playing together again .. And why ..


They were playing allot at some point and sometimes it felt like

she forgot about our time ..

See me and her are in a long distance, our time is cut short

in our 7 hour difference ..

but i knew she played more games and hung out more hours then

me with him for the longest while

But i said nothing trusting her, after a while i had to ask


Like why is it you play so much with him we barely have our time

it seems like he is all over you in some way, like maybe

idk maybe he likes you a little to much? ..

She is like naaaaah lol. he is gay ..

You know me being a man being in a relationship with a girl for

over 2 years at that point was like , ofcourse that makes it eisier


still gettin weeks past that i had my doubt about this guy

something felt off it didn't seem he was gay to me

it seemed he hanged out and talked to her in way's maybe

that just didn't seem to add up ..

i told her about it but it got brushed off nah he doesn't like me like that ..


i Never minded her playing with guy's talking to them

And somehow she is very loveable and just atracts everyone

And i'm used to it but again i trust her 200 % so i can step

over my own insecurity's and maybe jealousy i have and

be a better man the man that she needs ..


2 Months further or so ..

She calls me ... she's very upset ..

It was him ...

i was like whats wrong what happened now ?

She told me that he lied about him being Gay

He told her that he is bisexual ..


Me: just being like oh, i see.

She: i should've listened to you ... and told me she felt like she just lost a friend.

And i thought that was it ..


Not day's later , i'm sure it was 1 day ...

seeing him on her Discord again talking .. on there

creeping back in ...


i thought it was very strange and it raised allot of red flags..

He liked guy's only but oh NOPE sorry, he actually likes girl to

While being on her pretty much from day one like a bee on honey

And i immidietly thought how can she after that still be wanting to hang out with this guy

isn't it wrong ? does she not think about me ? she is in a happy.

That's what she tells me all the time we tell her we love eachother still every day

And we don't have allot of time to hang so i udnerstand she gotta have friends ..


But it seemed wrong to me for that guy to be still in the picture , after what i told her

she found out and how she be treating her and all that

We both me and her hate liars, at this point i never lied to her ever ..

and for this guy to just be around her asking her to play with him

i'm pretty sure every single day and now him confessing his sexuality preferences to her

that he doesn't just like men but also girls while being it seems so attached to her ..

isn't it wrong is it just me is it just mu jealousy playing up ????


idk, maybe it is because i wouldn't do that to her , love for me means i think about her more then myself

what she would think what she would like , if she didn't like a person for such clear

reasons that are more then a little odd, then i already would have let that person go ..

just to ... i know how she would think or could think about that whole situation ..


But fine i am wary now yes ofcourse, can you blame me what guy wouldn't be

were about to be three years together (officially)

but basicly we know eachother for 4 years now , were happy she has come to visit me with a friend

in the Netherlands they both thought it was perfect i'm a gentleman

and i tryd to show them both a good time even if i worried her bringing a friend and i really ddin't know her

it was perfect we were happy ..


i still didn't say anything much about her still seing this guy, cause again i trust her.

So maybe .. you know .. it doesn't matter if he likes her a little to much ..

our relationship is steady and stronger then it's ever been

We've come a long way and i've been alway's there for her, even if we both started working

and we could only hang out in the weekends ...


after a while thoo is started noticing .. i don't really have allot of friends ..

so i started noticing We've been msising more and more day's out of our weekends day's

and we only have a couple of hours in the weekends since our 7 hour difference, ..


Then she was sick on a saturday , then her mom needed her to do stuff or she needed to go with her fine

that's out of her control i thought but also there have been so many weekends this last year she just

had the sauturday or sunday She told me that Well her best friend needed to see her or she was going over

or this person or she also has being playing late in the night games with , whoever ..

so she wakes up late and tired when it is basicly already evening for me like 6 pm or even 7 or 8 pm and

that would leave is for just a few hours and tbh i alway's been patient so ing patient and

telling her to have a good time, maybe still beign a little dissapointed or upset sitting alone at home

having noone to talk to, and every single day my routine has been i wake up for work text her a heart

right away seeing her being up a little later when i turn on my computer playing games

usually with him , then i tell her i love her and i miss her asking her what's she been up to for her night

, then when i go to work i come back home and i wait, maybe i'l lwatch a little youtube or play games to

make the time go and i wait , for her to finally wake up so we can talk on Discord and maybe play something

together watch some netflix or whatever


Usually i say nothing of all this going on and tell her well have fun bby playing see you tonight when you wake up

but there has been times i tryd to tell her gently or let her know in a way i wqasn't happy we missed another day or

missign so much hours , like bby you wokoe up late again , yes i'm sorry she say's i'm like it's kie

i just miss you , she tells me i know i miss you to, or i'll tell her we've been missing so much day's we only have

the weekends, she tells me yes she is sorry, she is trying ...

i asked her straight up, mutiple times, if you don't wanna play with me or something yo ucan just tell me okie

she tell me NOO, ofcourse i want to spend time with you , and she want to spend more time then she has

i'm just okie then, and i hope for better day's ..


Then at late December, start of Januari i visited her in the States

2 weeks it was prefect we visit her friends we've been to places

it was good she was happy and we spend her birthday and Newyears

and it was the best ever , it was too me. it was actually blizz.


Now see about a lil month ago it happened and i finally had enough i had some rough weeks

and we've been missing every single weekend ..

The first weekend was her best friend showed up in her room sitting on her bed

while were suposed to hang out on saturday , at this point i also start asing her allot what she is doing

the weekends so i know we have our time she tells me nothing but she showed up anyway, and texted me she was

gonna spend the day with her, i was upset i needed her, and thought it was strange she showed up like

that in the morning cus she knows that is our time, my gf told me she doesn't know or she forgets that kinda stuff

but i know she doesn't, it's been like that , and also she didn't tell her that nooo she had to go, that is our time

and she can come back i nthe late afternoon for her like 4 pm is prolly when i go in she has all that time after to

hang with wehoever she wants ..


Then me going okie, it's kie bby have fun.


Then the next weekend after i have worked my ass off all week so happy it is weekend and we finally can spend some time

She has been sitting at home for i think 2 weeks already cus of Coronaso all the time in the world to spend any time with anyone

she wnats and thats fine .. but the next weekend i think it was the sunday , she got up and told me she made new friends

in a game she plays exessivly now Apex Legends, and promised to play with them ..

i wanted to yell at her you gonna leave me alone AGAIN ?? for totally random people promising them your time

when we have SO LITTLE ??! i didn't really understand why she would do that, even at the morning she could have been

maybe she just forgot in the moment and told them, but she could have told them sorry i forgot me and my bf

Who she keeps telling me i am her wordl her galaxy her everything her home ..

But she didn't i told her again like 99% of the time ah kie i see .. have fun bby.


Now then one week further ..

it happened , i'd lost my ..

At this point i'm so sad and wary and feeling neglected ..

And we had the best day i na while saturday, it was really good ..

but me in my head i'm still thinking we have had a good day but what about tomorrow, next week you know ..

so the evening was over for me , and i went to bed everything was good ..

i couldn't sleep really thoo , i've been turning in my bed for hours so i got up i saw she was on and on Apex

so i messaged her in the game as a surprise ... she's like hey ?!?! you're up ??

i'm like yes i couldn't sleep etc. her not being able to login to Apex seeing her log in and out i asked what was going on

Apex is not working it's not letting me in, her messages were also very slow not really responding fast to me ..

i wen't on Discord to message her instead of Origin cus maybe that's the reason we couldn't really talk talk

cause we don't use that at all to text eachother.

i Asked her how she was doing and told her about i couldn't sleep and if she maybe wanted to play a round of Hunt

with me just so i tire myself out for a little , maybe 30 minutes and hour tops ..


She told me No, that i needed sleep .. (It's him) ,and he has been waiting for 30 minutes ... she would feel bad ??

And something snapped inside of me , i couldn't believe she told me No in my face for him

and that he has been waiting for 30 minutes ...

Me just thinking about ALL ourt lost day's and hours and we have SO little ..

That she would tell me No for him, for just 30 maybe 40 minutes of her time ..

i wouldn't even cared if she said , Well is it okay if he joins is and we play trio's

but she didn't, i really didn't want to start ... but i wanted to let her know

i was upset. or sad at the least.


So i just said: oh ok.

Knowing she would notice i wasn't agreeing with it, i can also be bad at showing emotions

i'm a Taurus and my past , (tis a long story) but i can be really clear and tell her what i want and

don't but when i get upset or am sad i tend to shut myself off , maybe.

so i said oh ok.


She said she was sorry and she just felt bad for me.

It is what i alway's get a sorry and she feels bad, but then why can't she just tell someone to hey

the love of my life came on he just wants 1 round can you wait a little longer then we have the time after

if he goes to bed ... i'm sorry but i'd do anything for her give up any time with anyone for her if she asks

she needs me i'm there so .


then i said: so What?? but nvm. imma try sleep kie, bye.

i weanted to say so ing what he waited 30 minutes, so maybe that was confusing to her ? ...

but i was mad at that point she didn't want my time .. and spend it with him while i ask for almost nothign ever.


She then said: seriously ?


That made me almost go in a blind rage, not understanding i was upset for her already msising 2 weekends before

and now we had our first really good saturday that felt so perfect but before that saturday was over she already

blew me off for someone and him even ??


maybe i should've said it that way, and maybe i sometimes think if she loves me that much and alway's tells me she want

to spend more time, then why doesn she act and say or do things this way then , i don't want to spell it out ..

and maybe that is not fair, i'm ed up to , sometimes yes i can't be clear like i am usually at all

but i just want her to WANT spend time with me cause SHE WANTS too you know.


So when i was already in a blind rage, she knowing i was upset. and just not changing her mind on spending it with me.

or asking what was wrong ... i told her this


nah, that was the last time you did that , seriously

tellin you kay.


she just said: what ??


Me: Her best friend, MAYBE .. but him or mostly u anyone else.


She said: because i didnt want to be rude and ditch them after they waited for me ?

or is this just because its him.


And me being from Rage in duced to even sad she just said that to me ....

ofcourse it is ing him , but more importantly cause you just told me nope for

all i asked was 1 match of Hunt with me ? you couldn't make that ing work ??


She then proceeds to tell me:

i do it all the time, like every time we hang out

i'm always telling people no


This hurts...


And that is true, she tells people in OUR time i can hear her yell at her phone or social media's what teh people want from her

acting like she is anoyed, or maybe not acting she is anoyed but

i'm just thinking THAT is our time already you shouldn't even have to be talking to people or reading their , a couple of hours later you

can read and reply to them all and spend all the time you want with any of them so it didn't make sense to me ...


then i'll tell her : babe this isn't the FIRST time

i HAVE been very patient so in patient

i just don't understand how you can tell me no rn

and i am tellin you it hurts me and you firing it back at me tellin you how i feel, that it hurts you

naah i give you a night to think about it

good night


i wanted her to think it over, see or figure our for herself and especially for my mad ass to calm down

cause i didn't want to start a huge fight we have never fought it's been a perfect relationship you know

Well , for the most part since a while ...


The conversation was still going and not going to well, and i figured the girl she brought over when she visited me here

We became really good friends we clicked way better then anyone thought i thought ...

i know a little about how she thinks and is and thought she would or could help us , as a neutral party

something i never did before, but i was now desperate, she just didn't seem to understand me , mayeb i even thought she just didn't

care about what i said or thought cause of her actions and firing things back at me in a way i just didn't know how to make

her understand how bad this was for us and how broken i felt ..

So i told her to talk to her , i wanted to calm myself down as well before we kept talking and let her think let me think

and maybe they could talk about what happened and have some kinda insight ..

ofcourse that backfired at me ..

and her friend texted me if i was okay and my gf ..

i just told her what has happened everything ..


i woke up the next morning her still being up ofcourse, and told her she needs time to think about this whole thing over a night sleep

but we need to talk and not in text but on voice so i can explain

and she needs time to think about this whole thing over a night sleep, and me getting ready and rushing for work, i couldn't talk then neither.

and still being mad cus she didn't text me at all ... i figured she loves me so much she has something to say ...

maybe again that was little unfair of me to have handled it like that ...

And she putts that on me , telling me a left her when she wanetd to hear me cause i was not being heard ...

i don't understand sometimes the way she thinks , if i am her world ... but ..


Then it got worse, she was now ignoring me ...

And when i had a look on her Discord i saw him, and her other best friend jus ttalking happily on her Discord

Something i see more often when i am sad or upset or when i feel i get wronged and it hurts me so ing much ...

and i noticed something , first they were talking about how her best friend gotta step up to mod or something liek that idk

if that's true not do i care , but the timing on it ...

then i noticed something, i wasn't an admin no more on her Discord ... i got upset i'm like oh okay she wants to hurt me now ..

so i left the server in a rage ... and i messged her that if she wanted to hurt me now on purpose ..

she said she didn't know what i was talkin about and i epxlained what i saw ...


she told me no she didn't do anything to the discord roles

and i was awh , okay then that's weird cus i wasn't in there on top as an admin anymore and i scolled down and i was just

down with msotly everyone else in the nromal role, but mkay then maybe Discord ed up trhen thats weird.


then she proceeded to screenshot the logs and tehre wqas nothing about it in there ..

i told her she didn't need to do that that i believed her,

she said do you thoo, it hurt ...


then she proceeds to ghost me for a week, and i felt so lost ..

i can't believe the love of my life doesn't understand me anymore

Picks people she doesn't know over me for that little time we have

and trows back into my face when i am on the verge of breaking down ..


she tells me that she is broken and she can't talk,

that i walked away from her that evening while she was trying to listen ..

and i hurt her ... and i'm just like .... i don't even have words ...


at this point i am also just getting so much suspicious of the guy

like he must mean a hella lot to her if she picks him over me spend so much time with him

over me .. you know


so basicly 5 day's further me being a mess, lost allot of weight i couldnt eat or sleep good

while walking around like a zombie at work being broken and didn't know what to do

should i give her space right now should i fight for her as i promised i'd do if we ever get

bad and i did both ...


i trdy to text her now and again in those 5 day's some day's i didn't ..

i didn't want to overwhelm her but i didn't want her to think i just could let this silence

go on without me saying anything liek i didn't care , also i never been in a situation like

this before and since it's hard to get in touch with my own emotions let alone

expressing them this was a tiresome and horribly painfull experience for me


i tryd in all my might to explain to her, that some things might have worded in text i didn't mean or she

has misunderstood, just trying to get her to realise how i felt about everything and also to make her understand taht i understand her.


i've wrote down walls and walls of text to be ready for when we would talk and i would cover everything we needed to

what was on my mind what was on her mind.


and the talk wen't well, she was very quiet but listened to every word but i think i got her to understand and cover everything she wanted.

she told me now thoo she is broken and something broke in her she is seeing a therapist as well

things had changed a little for the better she was seeing me during middays in the weeks again as well

and we have been hangin out more in the weekends, i feel now like she is really trying ..

and it feels .. better ..



ofcourse i am still wary, she still is seeing this guy and i don't like it one bit ..

the whole situation is weird .. about him confessing his sexuality , twice apparently

i don't go around telling strange people i am a hetero sexual man ..

it just doesn't feel good ... but fine i don't say anything but my eyes are open now

and yes i'm watching more ..


And i'm still hurt and drained and broken and don't know what to do basicly even scared to even tell her about it

cause i don't know how she is gonna react to it with the way it has been going if i did.


so i did something stupid , 1 day last week , she has started streaming again on twitch ..

that is outside my times as well i noticed him being on there she made him a mod even on there and

the've still be playing relentlesly, so i had her stream open i was logged out and when i woke up

i saw some things he said , idk it was all out of context probably but it was there ...

and i'm just scared cus i asked her about him like why ??

why is he so important to you that you must hang out with after everything

she said he isn't important that they just friends and they play games that's all

and i said that's what you say, and i believe you. but what about him ?

do you even know how he feels about you ? cus i think theres more

no she said i don't think so .. great she doesn't think so

and i asked her does he flirt with you say sexual things, cus she once told me that she doesn't realise sometimes when

someone does, and i said cause you know if he does that would be really ed up right ? yes .. but

she doesn't think so ..


so what i saw i nthe Twitch chat was him saying something like: that's because you are very thicc and a friendship is a relation ship too.

and check your DM's, and i'm ing stupid insetad of just not , just letting it go, maybe just asking her ..

i tryd an attempt to login to her twitch and see the Dm's


something i've been wondering a while what if i just could see the dm's on Discord and twitch etc.

but i don't want her to think i don't trust her cause i really do , but i don't know what to do anymore

cause honestly i told her in my talk even i think that he is putting a strain on our relationship ..

but after everything i never told her to break off her friendship with him eveen if really wanted to.

And she just wants him in her life and now in our life ...


Cause she ofcourse noticed someone logging in on her Twitch and asked me if i did, cause she

can say the location and town and it's pretty ing obvious ..

idk why ... maybe cus i didn't want to make her feel sad , amybe cause i didn't wanna start some again

or maybe i didn't wanna go through it again that she after i'll let her know how much it pains me we don't see eachother

so much she ghosts me for a week, and i don't know what would happen if it happened again ...


but my stypid ass said no, why ??

she told me well someone in my location tryd to log , i knew i shouldn't have and just confessed but ...

i said no it wasn't me you gotta beleieve me , why would i even do it ...

she is like okay weird then and went to bed i was gonna go the the grocery shop , already hating myself

i broke my own promise not to lie to her cause in these 3 years i have never ... and being so mad at myself

for doin it the whole way to the grocey shop i thought what kidna idiot am i , did i do ???!

imma tell her when i get back and hope she isn't to mad and disapointed in me ..

so i did .. she was asleep at that point ..


and when she woke up ofcourse she wasn't happy ,

she said so you did lie to me ??

and i tryd to explain that things were still high and with him still being in the picture and i have no idea whats

goin on at all being in long distance like this and showed her the screenshot of why i did it as why it triggered me to

do what i did , i know it was bad and i wouldn't have ever but ...i did and i said sorry and i was an idiot but she

gotta understand after everything i cna't be like on my guard at all ? you know ...


so she took another day after to just not be able to talk to me another sunday gone, my fault again i guess..

then she couldn't talk the next day neither when i told her we should talk on voice but she woke up saying she couldn't talk

and again i was broken and can't believe it that she took these things so hard telling me that it wasn't healthy the way

i react to thing and i cannot understand that i am alway's there for her waiting when i get home from work everytime she is sick

or sad or need me and asks me for anything i'll be there, and now we had two bumpsi didnt'see them as fights

and i don't understand how things wen't like they did, like how it backfires on me like i'm doing so terribly wrong ..

and i know i'm not doign everything perfectly right now like i have but it's not bad but i feel like she sees this as some

relationship ending fights and i can't ...


So we talked , or more like i started explainging everything again over and over through text cause idk if she ..

or if i could take being away from her again being ghosted or like not ... idefk.

and i told her if she really wants to see this guy it is fine but i am not gonna come back on her discord i can't be on her stream

and see himn on there and we can't play games together with him and i don't wanna see or hear his name and i also won't ask then

what she's been up to and who she been playin with ..


She tells me that something that is a big part of her life her stream and art .. how can she not being able to want me there

and that she still would feel pressured like she has to let him go and bail on him other wise it wouldn't work for her

or she be thinking about it all the time ... and i cannot fhatom it .. How this can be a thing ....


But for the patient man i been and usually being the better man in everything and just putting myself in front and doing whats best

i basicly now have had to confess to her that if she wants him in our life that much, i will deal with it then

i told her she can invite me back into her Discord and i will just deal with him being there, i'll come on her streams

and talk to her if he's there and her mod even and deal with it like a man then cus i didn't think of it that way

and i understand i don't want her to feel pressured , because of me , i never want her to mad or upset cause of me ..

and that has never been a thing before ...


but i feel so alone, i have noone to talk to, noone that hits me up even from her Discord i left a while ago,

people on that discord even have been telling her to dump me ?! after the first thing that happened

peopel been telling her she is a best friend imposing times on her taking our times away ..

and i am just whitering away .... i DON'T know what to do anymore or say ...


i feel like anything i say or do will just come back at me, and then me being called or thought of as a terriuble guy

but i am not that guy .. and i am just ... lost..

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I only skimmed through because it's way too long. In the future, summarize the highlights. Long distance is one of the hardest forms of dating there is. If you can't close the distance within a year, why be stressed out and living in an unsatisfactory situation?


IMO, people who seek out LDRs are not ready for the reality of serious, local relationships. Either one or both are hiding a secret that a partner can't be privy to, or one or both suffers from low self esteem and feel that they can look better to someone over cyberspace instead of the person seeing them in 3D, amongst other smokescreens.


If you feel alone, that's your problem for not having created your own support system of friends and a hobby outside of your home. Don't ever make one person the sole center of your universe because it's smothering.


My advice? When social distancing is no longer an issue, join Meetup.com, or a co-ed sports team, or volunteer at a zoo, or anything else that strikes your interest. When you have a fulfilling life solo, you will attract the kind of girl who will be a better risk to your heart.

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Everything you write sounds like she fell out of love but is too cowardly to end the relationship. Based on my own experience with someone like this trying to hold on will only hurt you, a lot, repeatedly, over and over and over again.


Additional thought, the silent treatment is a Very bad way to communicate your displeasure and for me personally, that is a deal breaker going forward.


I co sign investing in your life where you live (and recommend dumping her ass she sucks!)

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Is there a TL;DR version of this, OP?


It's so long that most will skip it and you won't get the advice you're looking for.


Totally agree, I just skimmed through your post OP as it’s way too long, can you post the bits you mostly want advice on/ another person’s POV ?? I hope then you can get more of a response and some good advice

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Totally agree, I just skimmed through your post OP as it’s way too long, can you post the bits you mostly want advice on/ another person’s POV ?? I hope then you can get more of a response and some good advice


i know it is long but i wanted to write everything down for myself that happened into a document with as much information as i could that has happened recently and so on.

i know having more info, and making this a Giant wall cluster lol , can be allot or i guess to much and harder to give advice but i felt like narrowing it to

1 lil paragraph wouldn't really tell anyone the situation ...


But thanks everyone so far for the advice and suggestions.


Also no i did not send her this Giant wall of text, she doesn't need to see me narrowing down everything that happened, but it's in there what i told her and not


Anyway's thanks everyone, and i'm just not the kinda person who does things by himself i'm a gamer mostly and i work fulltime i just game and watch youtube alone,

i guess it is my fault then .. being lonely i guess


Also yes i never expected teh silent treatment i todl her i wanted to talk she told me that talking is the key to as well so idk, why she has taken the these to me minor bumps we had and blew it up so proportiontly ..


But i do LIKE to do things with her the two weeks she was here and i with her so 4 weeks we spend we went everywere had lots of fun and it was so great,

and i'm trying to make the moving thing possible she says she wants to , but now with corona that also has delayed us.

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i know having more info, and making this a Giant wall cluster lol , can be allot or i guess to much and harder to give advice but i felt like narrowing it to 1 lil paragraph wouldn't really tell anyone the situation ...


There is a big difference between one paragraph and long, rambling post you have above.


If you could condense it to a few key points and write in a more cohesive style, you will get more reads and responses.

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Did you copy/paste this from somewhere? Why not start journalling if that helps you cope?

no i did not send her this Giant wall of text, she doesn't need to see me narrowing down everything that happened, but it's in there what i told her and not
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Did you copy/paste this from somewhere? Why not start journalling if that helps you cope?



Cus i told you, condensing it to,


my girl been missing more us time more often lately more and more

And having met a new friend guy that wronged her twice that she came to me with

the most confusing and suspicious part about him cus i am fine with her hanging with guy/girl and everythin in between and she does without me thinking or complaining much

But he lied to her from the very beginning not only that about his sexuality, whyever people bring that up

(i asked now btw, it came up wit hher playin with his ex boyfriend at the time and they were just reminiscing apparently)

Anyway's after him confessing a month or a half or somethin later he is actually bi-sexual ... again , like -_-

While it seems he is like a bee on honey on her, she was very upset about the lying part, cus we both hate liars

but he came back soon after, well course my eyes were open at that point what bf wouldn't have SOME suspicions about him ..

or overprotecting and i am a little of that ...


and then at some point we were losing every weekend more time to spend

it was the third weekend in a row, and i asked her for a little mroe time cus i couldn't sleep and she said no

cus he promised him time and he had been wiating for 30 minutes, and it just felt wrong

it feels wrong if she would be spending time with a guy who has what i think is a crush on her ..


So i told her and we got in a fight, it seems she doesn't really believe he has a crush on her

and she tells me they are just friends and play games , i know and i trust her

but i think she is a little naive and very emphatic towards people


and he just seems also not very subtle about it i just notice things

that he say's or does, that just seem to evolve around her ..



secondly i thought if someone really wanted to give advice they would read it

it's very detailed about what happened , was said and done to describe the situation better

so you don't misjudge the situation just because you only heard what i think is wrong or happening.

i think just typing the core/ problems will be in the end get less accurate advice then you know as much details as possible

butthat's just me.


And yes i copy/pastaa from my own saved document, cus i was just emptying my mind and tryin to describe the best i could the whole thing.

for myself first.


i guess you can call it rambeling if you want, i like to call it emptying my heart in detail.

Also everyone copes in their own way, this is my way of coping i never tryd a forum but i don't have much people to talk to.

And me feeling lonely , from her is what it is don't tell me to go out and make friends and go places, i know i am not the most social guy out there i don't like

to or do things by myself here, and it is not the advice i asked, it's relationship advice i posted in not, my own social life.

Eevryone has their ways of doin things right, if you don't want to give advice then don't but don't tell me how to do things or cope with this if you don't even know me.

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It's just easier for other people to understand things that are organized and concise, is all. I read your second synopsis pretty quickly, but I couldn't make it through your first post because I didn't know where to find key information. But now I'm looking back and forth between them.


Am I correct in the following:


You're long distance

She lives in the US and you do not

There is a 7 hour time difference, so your hours to communicate are limited

She's been devoting what would usually be your time together to speak to another guy

You've told her this bothers you and she doesn't seem to get it

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