Ex reached out owes me money but no trust

[Horsegirl]

Billie28 and Jibralta,

Both good points! Yesterday was tough as it was just one more time he displayed his true colors ( he was supposed to pay me money yesterday). Of course he didn’t contact me to make arrangements. The anticipation of him possibly following through on a promise and knowing in my heart he wouldn’t hit me hard. This morning I woke up knowing that I will be ok , I have amazing friends and family that see me and care about me because of who I am . I had a bit of a pity party last night , today is going to be a good day. Today I choose to move forward without needing anything from him. I am worth so much more . I choose to not feel less than because one person cannot see my worth when there are so many others who have loved me for years that do.

[Jibralta]

Great attitude!

[Hollyj]

Don’t be so dramatic!!

 

It’s fine to trust someone when no reason not to. That’s normal and healthy.

 

You “trusted” someone who had already proven to not be trustworthy. That’s not healthy and never has a good outcome.

The qualities you describe of yourself are good qualities. But you trusted someone who displayed none of those. Why?

 

It’s not all about you , it’s also about the person you are with and choose to be with.

You chose to be with him despite not sharing qualities you posess but also admire and are proud of.

 

Stop feeling sorry for yourself because of your poor choices , instead try understand why you with all these great qualities made a poor choice??

Despite being loving , trusting, giving etc , do you suffer from low self esteem for example??

 

Totally agree.

 

OP, what brought you to this point of choosing such a poor relationship partner? There were many red flags, yet you continued on with the dysfunctional relationship. What exactly is so great about this guy, as it sounds like a great deal of drama and instability?

 

What happened to your self worth?

[Hollyj]

Billie28 and Jibralta,

Both good points! Yesterday was tough as it was just one more time he displayed his true colors ( he was supposed to pay me money yesterday). Of course he didn’t contact me to make arrangements. The anticipation of him possibly following through on a promise and knowing in my heart he wouldn’t hit me hard. This morning I woke up knowing that I will be ok , I have amazing friends and family that see me and care about me because of who I am . I had a bit of a pity party last night , today is going to be a good day. Today I choose to move forward without needing anything from him. I am worth so much more . I choose to not feel less than because one person cannot see my worth when there are so many others who have loved me for years that do.

 

So what did you expect change? This is who he is. You need to accept it. Block and delete him.

 

I think it would be wise to address the type of men you are choosing. I, also, used to choose people where there was no future, due to my low self esteem and trust issues, once I hit "the bottom" it forced me to address why I was choosing these types people. I will never go back to this type of toxic dynamic. This is about YOU!