Everyone loves my husband

[tattoobunnie]

From what I read, sounds just like my mom, just like it, but she's no where near a narcissist. One way to get others to talk is to share a little bit about yourself, for others to feel like they can spill their own beans. It's called charm.

 

If other people swoon, it could be you that is jealous. Can you tell me what he may do that puts you down, or doesn't care about you?

 

I also find you can trust people who are always talking about themselves, because they are way too busy talking about themselves, and don't talk about you behind your back. You may just not actually like your husband. I mean think of this way, after 17 years, what has changed that you are finally try to work out why he is the way he is?

[jimthzz]

So, how old are the two of you anyway?

 

Does he mistreat you?

 

Is it possible that he just is shmoozing more successfully than you do?

 

Honestly, none of us can make a diagnosis of narcissism. Nope.

 

Is it possible that you have become irritated with how your husband behaves with others compared to yourself for other reasons than some kind of flaw in him?

[Wiseman2]

Ok so he's recently puffing and boasting, so? There will always be name-droppers, and people who want to be in the spotlight, know-it-alls, etc.. Why not up your self esteem through things you do well? What hobbies, interests, activities, talents, etc do you have that you could spend more time with?

 

Do not live vicariously through him or in anyone's shadow.. Live your own life on your own terms. This isn't about him or his recent name-dropping. There are always people who want to keep up with the Jones's and need to say 'the Benz' instead of car.🙄

But recently with this new position at the university it's gotten worse.

[ninjabib]

I'm not getting narcissist either, not that i am a professional by any stretch. He may be a smooth,slippery and attention seeking son of a gun but i'm getting nothing messed up and evil from him.

 

You even said yourself he's good man most the time. Perhaps he's so damn smooth it's irksome and grinds your gears, i can get that. This is just some peoples character. Social dynamite. Seems to roll around in muck and always come out shining.

 

I know people like him. It does grate but not evil for me As for the false front i think we all do that to some extent.

[goddess]

I'm not seeing how anyone here could responsibly insinuate the guy is a narcissist. Identify and handle your actual marital issues accordingly.

 

Some people do swoon for the sake of it, but by and large, it's not some grand theme that an entire network of people get satisfaction from one sided conversation. If everyone you know is having a blast with him, I'm much more inclined to scrutinize the outlier.

 

According to what OP stated, he fits quite a number of the official criteria for NPD. That's why we believe he is a narcissist.

[Cherylyn]

According to what OP stated, he fits quite a number of the official criteria for NPD. That's why we believe he is a narcissist.

 

Yes, that's right, goddess.

 

I've known several people who are exactly as you had described, Traes. You either accept your husband as is or after 17 years of marriage, do something about it. Either he goes or you go or seek your own happiness if you're stuck with him.

 

Unfortunately, a lot of people are stuck with spouses whom they despise or don't respect. If there's no way out and he refuses to be considerate of you, don't rely on him to provide your happiness.

 

If you don't expect any positive changes from him, you won't be disappointed and hurt anymore.

 

And, don't be envious of him. There is nothing to be envious about. His disdainful characteristic traits are shameful and disgusting. What's so envious about that?