Emotional support group Covid19

[SherrySher]

1 minute ago, reinventmyself said:

It's interesting to see who hollers the loudest.  If you believe in your conviction then you wouldn't need to defend it. . so loudly, repeatedly and obnoxiously

Yes.

This pandemic has brought out a lot of truths on different people in our lives and some not so nice ones.

I am still somewhat shocked on the ones who refuse to be responsible or are telling everyone to not follow the rules, Covid's not real, etc.

 Ones I honestly never thought would be like that.

[reinventmyself]

37 minutes ago, SherrySher said:

Yes.

This pandemic has brought out a lot of truths on different people in our lives and some not so nice ones.

I am still somewhat shocked on the ones who refuse to be responsible or are telling everyone to not follow the rules, Covid's not real, etc.

 Ones I honestly never thought would be like that.

We all have friends who vary in their degrees of being responsible or disciplined.  These things were just mere difference and not deal breakers 

I now notice my less disciplined friends sign up for whatever benefits them. One's who have NEVER been socially or politically aware are now waving any flag that gives them the permission to not behave responsibility.  And being loud about it.  I think it's really telling.  No need to lecture me about it.

I get it.  It's hard.  Being responsible means you sometimes have to set your needs aside momentarily. . For the greater good

[boltnrun]

I love me some beer. Absolutely love it. But when I was pregnant my doctor told me not to drink because it would harm my unborn child.

Did I throw a tantrum and lay down on the floor screaming about freedom and how the doctor was trying to "control" me and calling him a communist? No, I knew alcohol could harm my child so I didn't drink! Not that hard!

Having to wear a small piece of cloth inside Costco or Walmart won't kill those people. But they act like it will.

Ridiculous.

I did have some family members call the virus a "liberal hoax"...that is, until SIX of us got it. Then they shut up, at least on social media. They're still screaming "open everything up!!" but no more hoax talk.

[Seraphim]

It certainly has created a lot of disappointment in people. 

[reinventmyself]

So, I have a friend coming in town for a funeral.  Words out she's arriving Thursday and staying with a mutual friend and wants us to get together.  We've done to patio social distancing this summer.  It's now cold and things in the meantime got a little laxed  No firm plans but assuming now a handful will be in the house?  

Now CA has travel restrictions in different counties.  Not sure what county she flies into, I text her asking if the restrictions have changed her plans.  Me and my selfish agenda, not wanting to be the odd man out and say I won't join them for the get together.

As it turns out she'll need to fly into the next county.  She had no idea and wasn't happy.

I stir things up further and text my friend who's home she's staying at and it turns out she was exposed and testing tomorrow.  The 4th person in this party is currently very sick and testing tomorrow as well.  She was with someone who tested positive but symptom free.

I feel a twisted sense of relief things are falling apart.  I didn't want to be in the position to be the only one saying no.

[boltnrun]

I did say no. I was one of the cousins (there were three of us) who declined to attend the planned family Christmas get together. The gathering was eventually cancelled and the three of us got publicly blamed but I didn't care. If my other cousin wanted to throw me under the bus that's fine. So be it.

[SherrySher]

I've said no every time. Yes, red-faced and yes stammering. I don't like confrontations or hurting people's feelings.

But I still stood my ground.

I am immunocompromised. No matter how careful someone has said they've been, I just can't chance it.

[luminousone]

A Facebook acquaintance of mine (our kids were in Cub Scouts  together years ago) still thinks it is a hoax. And when the news reported about people getting the vaccine, she called them “sheeple”. 
 

But - she is a school bus driver, and so is currently unemployed. I bet if they required her to get the vaccine in order to go back to work, she would. I don’t think she has ever been an anti-vaccer. Just a supporter of our current administration.

So I’ve kept her as a FB friend all the way through, because I feel it is her right to express opinions that are different from mine. But now her posts (and re-posts) are becoming more and more filled with vitriol. I usually just scroll on past. But it is starting to get to me.

 

[SherrySher]

1 hour ago, luminousone said:

I usually just scroll on past. But it is starting to get to me.

I can relate.

I may not confront anyone or say anything out loud, but I am so damned tired of the conspiracy theorists, the selfish people, the irresponsible people, the complainers, etc.

It's a mask dammit, and it's staying home till this virus clears up a bit. You'd think with some people, you were asking them to have their leg cut off!

Ugh, yeah, it does start to get to a person. 😞

[Cheetarah]

 I’ll never understand how someone can willy nilly go to an indoor restaurant...get drunk, share drinks and then go try to dance with the masked waiter who looks terrified(an FB friend got tagged in a video like this - then in the next breath wants to preach safety.  Did you not review your tags?).  
 

And yes, indoor service has been closed here for awhile but in addition to establishments being openly defiant, we are a 45 minute drive from the next state which is completely lax.  

I think those things boggle my mind more than the ones who think it’s not real.  There’s a weird and strange self protection thing in believing conspiracy theories.  What is there in knowing it’s real, having seen some of your friends be hospitalized for it, but be reckless anyhow?

[Fudgie]

Cheet, yeah I take 40mg a day of pantoprazole. It works well for me so I keep taking it. Hopefully her follow-up will be helpful, who knows maybe she needs a bit bigger dose.

If you (or anyone else) is concerned about at-home pulse oximeters, this is something I was concerned about as well. It's well known that many are just not accurate. However, I can vouch for one brand on Amazon. "Zacurate" brand on Amazon is available for about $30 USD and it's very accurate. I know this because I've personally tested it on several medical-grade (in a medical facility) pulse oximeters and the numbers were either the same or maybe one digit off, for both oxygen sats and heart rate. I know a patient who uses this all the time and he's even tested it himself, it's accurate. 

It's even good on hypoxic folks. I went slightly hypoxic in October following a small procedure I needed to have - nothing to do with COVID, I was given some IV narcotics while I was waking up and that crap makes me forget how to breathe properly. My oxygen levels were low 90s/ high 80s for an hour or so if I didn't think often about breathing. I was very tired but I pulled my oximeter out of my bag and it had the same numbers. 

[reinventmyself]

My friend updated me about her plans to fly in.  She's flying into the county that's restricted and is limited to essential travel only.  She writes in a text  "it's only a piece of paper you have to fill out and they can't possibly enforce that you quarantine for 10 days anyway"

Meanwhile two of my friends are testing today.  One is really sick and I've watched her run around for the last year, so I am surprised she hasn't had it by now.  

None of this sways my friend flying in.  She'll be staying with one of the two above mentioned friends.  Add in she is one a just a select few invited to attend a funeral on Friday.  Zero consideration to whom she might expose.  Knowing this family, only older immediate family members will attend.

The selfishness is mindboggling.  No one should dare disrupt her world for one weekend.

My friend who's home she is staying last night mentioned it might be best if she came another time.  But I know her to be to nice to say that to her.  And I know that visiting friend to be too self absorbed to care to ask if it's still even ok considering everything that is currently going on.

These are most closest circle of friends.  It's trying to isolate, work from home and not really have any outlets.  I miss my life, my friends and now I lose respect for them when it matters most.

[boltnrun]

If this friend wants to go that badly she can rent an Air BnB.

And it's not "not nice" for your other friend to say, sorry, but I'm not able to have you stay over.

There seems to be a lot of codependency going on.  Saying "no" to someone isn't saying "I hate you and don't want to be your friend anymore!!"  And if they stop being a friend over something that trivial...they were never a true friend to begin with.

I didn't care that my cousin got upset that I decided not to attend the planned family gathering.  That was her choice.  She can get over it or choose not to.  Not my problem.  And as it turned out, she got over it and we are fine.

[reinventmyself]

1 minute ago, boltnrun said:

If this friend wants to go that badly she can rent an Air BnB.

And it's not "not nice" for your other friend to say, sorry, but I'm not able to have you stay over.

There seems to be a lot of codependency going on.  Saying "no" to someone isn't saying "I hate you and don't want to be your friend anymore!!"  

Totally agree, but they don't think or reason the way I do.

[boltnrun]

1 minute ago, reinventmyself said:

Totally agree, but they don't think or reason the way I do.

I get it, I used to be terribly codependent.  I would sacrifice anything, even put myself into financial distress, trying to make the guy I was dating happy.  But one day I just got tired of it all.  I read up on codependency, realized what I'd been doing and resolved to stop.

Now I have no problem saying "no" if that's what works for me. But it took some work to get here.

[Seraphim]

1 hour ago, reinventmyself said:

My friend updated me about her plans to fly in.  She's flying into the county that's restricted and is limited to essential travel only.  She writes in a text  "it's only a piece of paper you have to fill out and they can't possibly enforce that you quarantine for 10 days anyway"

Meanwhile two of my friends are testing today.  One is really sick and I've watched her run around for the last year, so I am surprised she hasn't had it by now.  

None of this sways my friend flying in.  She'll be staying with one of the two above mentioned friends.  Add in she is one a just a select few invited to attend a funeral on Friday.  Zero consideration to whom she might expose.  Knowing this family, only older immediate family members will attend.

The selfishness is mindboggling.  No one should dare disrupt her world for one weekend.

My friend who's home she is staying last night mentioned it might be best if she came another time.  But I know her to be to nice to say that to her.  And I know that visiting friend to be too self absorbed to care to ask if it's still even ok considering everything that is currently going on.

These are most closest circle of friends.  It's trying to isolate, work from home and not really have any outlets.  I miss my life, my friends and now I lose respect for them when it matters most.

Can you inform this poor family? 
 

I know if someone had showed up sick at my father’s funeral would have gutted them like a fish. 

[reinventmyself]

1 hour ago, Seraphim said:

Can you inform this poor family? 
 

I know if someone had showed up sick at my father’s funeral would have gutted them like a fish. 

No.   They are only acquaintances of mine.   

I agree.  I'd be livid.  That's why I come here to talk about it.  It seems I'm mostly alone on my take on this.

Not to mention she works at Costco as optician. She is flying from 3 states away into California where things are currently catastrophic and there is a freakin' travel ban.

At the same time I need to be fair and remind myself noone has test results at this time.

But it wouldn't matter because its all about her right now

[Seraphim]

37 minutes ago, reinventmyself said:

No.   They are only acquaintances of mine.   

I agree.  I'd be livid.  That's why I come here to talk about it.  It seems I'm mostly alone on my take on this.

Not to mention she works at Costco as optician. She is flying from 3 states away into California where things are currently catastrophic and there is a freakin' travel ban.

At the same time I need to be fair and remind myself noone has test results at this time.

But it wouldn't matter because its all about her right now

Ugh ! I would just tell her under no circumstances are you meeting her. I am having very little kindness or understanding for azzes that only care about dems rights right now. If it was legal to hit people with a shovel I would be tempted . 

[waffle]

How can someone be all "I wear a mask because I care about others" and in the next breath want to assault those others you pretend to care so much about? 

Serious question. 

I see people every day who are doing something different than I am and it literally never occurs to me to hate them or harm them in any way.  The very worst in humanity has been brought out by this. 😞 What if we just respected other peoples' opinions and simply go the other way without incident if we're uncomfortable?

[Seraphim]

2 minutes ago, waffle said:

How can someone be all "I wear a mask because I care about others" and in the next breath want to assault those others you pretend to care so much about? 

Serious question. 

I see people every day who are doing something different than I am and it literally never occurs to me to hate them or harm them in any way.  The very worst in humanity has been brought out by this. 😞 What if we just respected other peoples' opinions and simply go the other way without incident if we're uncomfortable?

But is science an opinion? Is epidemiology an opinion? 
 

Did I say I hate people ? Nope, not at all. I said I am tired of their opinion. Would I actually harm people ? Well, I am 54 and haven’t yet so I am not likely to go bezerk and do it now. 
 

I just don’t think the science of viruses includes opinions. 

[Cheetarah]

14 minutes ago, waffle said:

How can someone be all "I wear a mask because I care about others" and in the next breath want to assault those others you pretend to care so much about? 

Serious question. 

I see people every day who are doing something different than I am and it literally never occurs to me to hate them or harm them in any way.  The very worst in humanity has been brought out by this. 😞 What if we just respected other peoples' opinions and simply go the other way without incident if we're uncomfortable?

Assault issues aside(which I do not agree with. although I’d have no problem shoving/punching an unmasked person yelling in my face, self defense), there is no being all “kumbaya” and come together right now about this stuff.  
 

The people who aren’t following safety guidelines are ENDANGERING people.  Their opinions and thus, their actions, are harmful to others.  Deadly.  
 

Yeah, I truly detest people who recklessly contribute to the deaths of others.  

[Fudgie]

It's not just an "opinion" when someone forgoes public health advice and puts others, innocent people, at risk. If some adult wants to eat crap all the time, fine. If an adult wants to do drugs at home, fine. But not wearing a mask and having small gatherings is harming all of us. The CDC has stated that the primary source of covid infections have been from such gatherings. It's affecting all of us.

Personally, I think if people don't want to do these simple mandates, fine, but sign a DNR/Do Not Hospitalize order and make copies and nail a copy to the front door. That way they can have their gatherings and when they get sick and can't breathe, they can die at home rather than crowd up the hospitals for people who WERE careful. 

And, folks, this is why I refuse to pick up time on covid wards. I have the ability to save lives but I don't want to help save any irresponsible people after seeing the utter disrespect and ignorance people are displaying out in my community. So I stay home. 

[Seraphim]

Yup, my frustration is far less dangerous than someone’s “ opinion” not to wear a mask because they ain’t gonna get the rona. 

[boltnrun]

This is not about "freedom" but about caring for one another.

I presume everyone has seen examples of people infecting others because they chose not to wear a mask and had the virus.  That's exactly how I got it; because some selfish a-hole didn't want to wear a mask and didn't care how many people they infected and possibly killed.

It's appalling how many people don't give a fig about anyone but themselves.  Whining about "masks make me sweaty!!" and "I'm so borrreeedddd at home!!"  Well, sorry that you hate your home and your family so much that you're willing to risk killing them with a deadly virus!  Masks make my nose run.  Know what I do?  I carry a damn kleenex.  Problem solved.

Ugh...

[Fudgie]

What really grinds my gears is knowing that so many vulnerable seniors and other folks with medical conditions are being good and safe. But if they have a medical emergency unrelated to covid, they will get horrendous care and/or contract the virus in the hospital setting because of these idiots. 

It's not fair. It boils my blood.